AOL: A Revelation Story of the Alternate Kind

By Rose <>

Rated G

Submitted March 2000

Summary: What screen name will Lois choose in AOL? The answer explains a *lot*. ;)


"Argh!" Lois pushed herself away from her laptop in disgust. She just didn't understand it. She wrote Kerth caliber stories for a world-renown newspaper, possessed a brown belt in Tae Kwon Do, and had once even gained Superman's powers and was a superhero for a while. So why was it that she was having so much trouble getting started on AOL?

She stood and moved to the kitchen for a beverage. Clark was sitting at the kitchen table, slowly eatting his breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast, and reading that morning's edition of *The Daily Planet.*

"Morning, Honey," he said when she entered.

Standing behind him, Lois slid her arms around his neck and planted a kiss on the top of his head. Clark set down the paper, and turned around so that he could kiss her properly.

"What's got you so tense, Hon?" Clark asked, messaging her shoulders gently.

"Oh, it's nothing… Just this stupid AOL. I've been trying and trying to create a screen name, but everytime I type something in, it's taken!"

"Well, what have you tried? Maybe I can help you come up with something."

"I've tried Lois Lane, Lois Kent, LoisLaneKent, and even Mad Dog Lane. All of them, already in use. How many people could possibly be called Mad Dog Lane? I was even going to try Ultrawoman, but I didn't want to risk anyone to making the connection."

Clark grinned. His own screen name, Farmboy22866 had been accepted on the first try. He tried to keep Lois from getting too worked up.

"Honey, why don't you give it a rest? You're always racing around trying to do a million things— research, write a story, or start up AOL. Why don't you and I spend a little time relaxing today, and forget about AOL for a while?"

"Oh? And just how, do you propose, we spend this time relaxing?" Lois asked coyly, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh, I'm sure I could come up with some interesting ideas…" Clark pulled Lois to him for another kiss.

"Mmmm," Lois murmured. "I think I could arrange some time in my schedule for a little *relaxation.*"

Clark smiled. He loved his wife. She was beautiful, brilliant, and sexy. He loved making her smile, and he really loved making her *relax.*

After relaxing for the rest of the morning, and again later that afternoon, Lois was able to get up and face the computer again without stress. She successfully created her new screen name, and sent emails to all of her friends and family so they'd know her email address. Then she signed off, and went to research her latest story.

Clark sat down at the laptop to check his own email. When the sign on window appeared, Clark's eyebrow arched in confusion.

"Zoomway?" Clark wondered aloud. *Why did Lois name herself after a highway?*