Secrets Jude aka Judith Williams Rated: PG13 Submitted: September, 2001 This is a revised version of a sequel to "The Circle Game" which I posted on the Zoomway's Fanfic Board in July. In response to some suggestions made there, I have added quite a bit of new material and re-written several things. It is the second entry in The Circle Game trilogy. You don't need to have read "The Circle Game" to know what's going on in "Secrets", but reading it may enhance your understanding. For continuity, I've used song lyrics as chapter markers just as I did in TCG. This is a different kind of story from TCG. Here I've attempted to write a mystery, suspense thriller. I have no idea if I've succeeded, so I hope you'll let me know. Please send feedback to the e-mail address above. I couldn't have finished this without the help of my excellent beta readers - Gerry Anklewicz, Anne Carlson and Becky Bain - who have been rigorous taskmasters. Any problems still in the story are there because I wouldn't take their advice. Additional thanks go to Sherry Murphy and Anne Carlson for expertly beta reading the new material. The characters from the Lois and Clark television series are not mine. I have only borrowed them for a while. The characters and incidents I have created belong to me and may not be used by anyone without my permission. < > enclose direct thoughts; * * indicate emphasized words. PROLOGUE October 17, 2032 Once you held me so tight I thought I'd lose my mind You said I rocked your world You said it was for all time You said that I would always be your girl. All I ask Don't tell anybody the secrets Don't tell anybody the secrets That I told you. Lucinda Williams The thought worried at her brain. In Metropolis, New Troy, USA, it was after midnight, in that dark interval between 'last night' and 'this morning' when those who cannot sleep reflect mournfully and regretfully on their pasts and fearfully for their futures. Laura Lane Kent Forrest was not sleeping. The man she had fallen in love with and married five years before had just made love to her with fierce intensity and was now sleeping beside her in exhaustion. Having spent himself renewing the passion that had once been their second natures, he lay, arms still around her, his head on her breast. There had been a time, long ago, when she would have been happy and contented holding him. Tonight she felt miserable and frightened. After dozing for a moment, she woke suddenly to find that Jack was no longer in her arms. He had turned on his side, his back to her. She thought He had turned away from her, *left* her to be a stranger sharing their house, occasionally their bed, but they were not together. And she had never known why. From that moment, he had no longer been a vibrant presence in her life. He would sometimes return from one of his many business trips abroad, strung out and on edge. Seeking comfort, he would make love to her almost violently. It was during one of these interludes that their daughter, Carla, had been accidentally conceived. When they were in public, he played the buffoon, a southern clod with the sensitivity level of a stud bull. Her parents were confounded and bewildered. Her brother, Chris, who had thought that he and Jack could be great friends, pitied her. She didn't know what had happened, she didn't know what to do about it, and her mother's hints that they should talk about it were becoming more and more frequent and more and more obvious. The one thing she *did* know was that tonight she would have to celebrate her mother's birthday and pretend to be happy. She only hoped Jack wouldn't ruin the party. At just after 7:00 a.m., the Daily Planet newsroom was almost deserted except for one night man still on call in case there should be any break in the usual boredom that preceded the arrival of the morning shift. One other occupant of the room sat at his desk firing up his computer and looking at the research that had been left for him the night before. Christopher Kent glanced briefly at some information he had uncovered about a mysterious figure named Ferret who was apparently the head of a shadowy organization that unearthed, stole and sold to the highest bidder, secrets from the governments of the world. He had little more than the name and some rumors, and right now his editor wanted him on the trail of what looked like corruption in the dispensing of overseas aid to countries in need. His editor expected him to show that he had the 'stuff' that made his parents the great award-winning reporters they had been. He turned to his task. He had a lot to do before his mother's birthday party tonight. It was after 8:00 a.m. in Guayaquil, Ecuador, where Maria Escobar, CHILD's administrative representative in the country, was unlocking the door to her recently acquired office. As an adviser to Lois Lane, the head of CHILD - Communities Helping Innocent Lives Develop - she was frequently sent on assignments to Spanish-speaking countries because of her bilingual upbringing. Now she was in Ecuador to oversee the distribution of food and medical supplies to families displaced by the volcanic eruption of a few days earlier. She wasn't happy about what Lois had told her. The World Economic/Environmental Recovery Council (WERC) would also be funneling funds to help Ecuador recover from the devastating damage to its environment, and Clark had assigned Hector, a bookish, mild-mannered man to keep an eye on the money. Maria considered this about-to-be-formed working relationship with disgust. She was an intelligent, vivacious, aggressive *Metropolitan* woman, a cum laude Harvard graduate herself and the daughter of Ecuadorian parents emigrated to America. She was certainly not some shy se¤orita waiting for her se¤or to tell her what to do. Well, she would waste no time before setting him straight when he arrived. Up in the highlands at Quito, Francisco Arroyo del Rio gazed out the window of his expensive high rise apartment at the snow- capped sierras ringing the city. His mind, however, was not on the beauty of the vista before him. He was, instead, mentally counting the millions of $ucres being diverted to his Cayman Island bank account from the volcanic disaster relief funds he administered. He speculated on how long the theft would go undetected and how soon he should transfer his gains to his numbered Swiss account. Taking a last sip of his chocolate, he breathed in the cool morning air and thought Back in Metropolis at 9:15 a.m., Marshall Stewart was waking from a dream in which he possessed his beloved, Lois Lane, and the objectionable Clark Kent was past and forgotten. All he needed was a chance, a toe in the door of opportunity, so to speak, and he could make that dream into a reality. He did not understand his obsessive love for this woman, but he knew he could not find happiness without her. By 10:30 a.m. Henry Forrest was in his Washington D.C. office reading the report from his son, Jack. He would never, of course, perform as well as Jeff; that was a pity, but that chapter was over. One had to cut one's losses and move on. Ferret caught a noon flight to Yucatan. He was meeting with a contact arriving from Cuba. How annoying that the man could not enter the United States without attracting suspicious eyes. It was vexatious finding excuses for these trips. Ferret sighed. ++++++++++ METROPOLIS JANUARY 13, 2033 Were we in Tahiti; were we on the Nile Long, long ago, say an hour or so, I recall that I saw your smile. I remember you; You're the one Who made my dreams come true A few kisses ago. I remember you; You're the one Who said I love you too, I do, didn't you know. I remember too a distant bell And stars that fell, like rain Out of the blue; Well, when my life is through And the angels ask me to recall The thrill of them all; Then I will tell them I remember you. Johnny Mercer It had been three months since Lois's ill-fated birthday celebration. Since that unpleasant night, Laura had seen her parent's happy marriage break apart, her father almost die only to be saved through the cooperation of his family, a dear friend, and a woman attempting to find absolution for her previous misdeeds. Her parents were together again, rebuilding their lives, but her mother was still intent upon finding out what was wrong in Laura's own troubled marriage and was, in true Lois Lane fashion, relentlessly presenting her daughter with increasingly pointed invitations to 'talk'. Clark had forcefully handed Jack an ultimatum about his public treatment of her, and Jack no longer drank too much and made a fool of himself or embarrassed her. But in their private lives they were still separate from each other, strangers going about the routine of their daily lives - she at her STAR Labs research office where she presently sat in contemplation, he at his father's office in D.C. or traveling for him on assignments abroad. How had they come to this point in their lives after such a hopeful beginning? ++++++++++ Five years before, on a ski holiday in St. Moritz, she had walked blindly around a corner in the hotel where she was staying and stumbled into the arms of the man she thought she'd never meet. "Judas Priest! How clumsy of me. Ah hope you'll forgive me for bein' so thoughtless." He had just a touch of the South in his voice - not enough to be a drawl, but hinting that it had once been his natural speech. He bent to help gather up the files she had dropped, work she had brought for when she wasn't on the slopes. Scrambling to retrieve the final folder, she rose, saying "Oh, no, it was my fault, I should have looked before I cut the cor..." She looked up and looking back at her were the clearest blue eyes she had ever seen. They were set in the face of a blond Adonis - well over 6 feet tall, lithe and muscular. She was suddenly hit by a jolt of what must have been static electricity. He was occupied with appraising her short black curls, expressive milk chocolate eyes framed by long, luscious black lashes, a pert nose, a voluptuous mouth and, on quick glance, a figure of perfect proportions, tall with long legs. "I take full responsibility, beautiful lady, and I insist on helping you take this paraphernalia to your room as penance. Now you can't deny me that, can ya?" Laura had acquaintance with every line thrown by every manner of man and boy Metropolis had to offer, so she recognized one when she heard it. But she liked this one; in fact, she found it charming. "How very gallant of you, sir. Do I detect a note of the Southern Gentleman in your voice?" "Why yes, ma'am. You truly do. At least there was one hidin' in there somewhere, once-upon-a-time. Now, if you'll just lead the way." She did, and by the time they reached her room, she knew that he was as talkative and outgoing as she was quiet; that he was in advertising and public relations, and would she please prove that she had forgiven him for being such a big ox by having a glass of wine and dinner with him "this evenin'." Normally, she would have refused him politely, retired to her room for a hot bath and room service while she pored over those files. But he* was* charming, and that bite of static electricity still tingled. "Tell you what. Why don't we meet in the bar for a glass of wine at 7:00, and we'll go from there." "You don't mind if I'm hopeful and go ahead and make dinner reservations for 8:00? Don't suppose I could persuade you to have that glass of wine at 5:00? Seven o'clock seems such a long time away. By the way, my name's Jack Forrest." She laughed. "If I drank wine with you for three hours, I'd never make it to dinner. I'll see you at 7:00, Jack, and I'm Laura Kent." Chanting her name, he salaamed his way out the door to run down the stairs thinking They met in the bar at 7:00, had a glass of wine and then another as they sat near the huge fireplace watching the heavy snow swirling outside a large plate-glass window, and went in to dinner, talking and laughing and never running out of things to say. He told her that he'd been working in his family business, but had recently decided to strike out on his own, which had disappointed his father. That he was from a proud, old southern family who were transplanted Charlestonians now living in the Virginia hunt country to be near their business in D.C. That his full name was Jackson Bedford Forrest and his older brother was called Jeff, short for Jefferson Lee. That he had graduated from The Citadel, number 1 in his class as had his brother and father and a line of male Forrests stretching back as long as there had been a Citadel. She had sat listening, laughing in the appropriate places, or looking serious in others, but saying very little. "I guess you don't volunteer a lot in the conversin' department," he said. "'I'm a good listener." "I can see that, but now *I'm* goin' to listen. So start talking. Tell me about yourself. What do you do when you're not skiing? Where do you live? What's your family like? And how did you get to be so beautiful?" She gave him a wide grin, and he thought he would need resuscitation. "I'm from Metropolis." He gazed at her with admiration. "What's the matter with all the men in Metropolis that you're still walking around free...unattached...single?" Then he gave her his best charming, boyish smile. He listened as she continued, ignoring his unabashed adoration. "I have a Ph.D. in Bio-Chemistry and do research at STAR Labs. My full name is Laura Lane Kent and my parents are Lois Lane and Clark Kent who..." "Are just about the most famous investigative reporters and columnists in the world." "You've heard of them, then?" "Who hasn't? But go on. Do you have any brothers or sisters? Boyfriends?" "I have a younger brother, Chris, Christopher James, and my boyfriends are none of your business." "Feisty, aren't you?" "Nosy, aren't you?" "Where did you get such a sassy mouth?" "You should meet my Mother." "I agree. When do we leave?" Things were beginning to move much too fast! "I think I'd better leave this conversation and go up to bed. It's getting late and I want to be on the mountain early." "Wait, you didn't finish telling me all about yourself." "Another time, maybe? Come on. You can walk me to my room." After they exchanged the obligatory "thank you for a lovely evening" he asked her which run she was skiing the next day. She replied that she didn't know; she wanted to wait to see what the conditions were. He said that he might see her, bade her goodnight and left. As she watched him go down the stairs, she realized, with surprise, that she wished the evening had not ended so soon. And she was again surprised by a little tug in her chest where her heart lay beating. On the way downstairs, he was thinking The next morning the wind and snow had stopped; a glorious sun shone on deep new powder. she told herself. She dressed in her black ski pants and boots, white turtleneck, a Nordic patterned sweater in Scandinavian hues of green, blue and white with flecks of deep red, and topped it with a burgundy ski jacket, knit cap and leather gloves. She regarded herself carefully in the mirror before leaving, making sure her eye makeup was just right, her hair not too Little Orphan Annie-ish, her lipstick unsmeared and just the right shade. Then she picked up her skis and poles and headed for the cable car that would take her to the top of Corvatsch Glacier, the most difficult skiing challenge at St. Moritz. The ride up the mountain was incredulously exhilarating, as the ski lodge dropped below her and the valley spread out under her gaze. Miniature huts with glacier green or rust colored metallic roofs looked like so many Monopoly houses thrown randomly about across a deep snow field pierced by the green tops of trees poking upwards trying to snag the cable as it passed them by. Small figures became tiny and then black dots zipping about the mountainsides. The air was cold and clean, the sun, blinding as she neared the top. The cable car eased into its landing and stopped. She stepped out onto the top of a remote white world peopled with an exclusive group of expert skiers. As she glanced around she spotted a blonde head turned away looking over the ski trail wending downwards. Her heart bumped. Then he turned, and his smile sent a beam of warm light into her chest filling the corners of her heart, which began a tap dance to a rhythm that Tommy Tune could only wish for. She was lost and there was nothing to be done about it. He said, "I was right about you. You're not the kind to stick to the lower slopes on a day like this. Let's go. Last one down buys lunch." She managed to gasp out something affirmative and then they were flying down the mountain, initially schussing away from the top, then turning into long traverses, carving endlessly back and forth across the face of the glacier, until they finally reached the tree line. Then the broad reach of the snow disappeared into narrow paths between groves of trees only to open and widen again. They stayed together for most of the way but she lost him when one of the paths divided, and he went one way and she the other. After that she didn't see him again until, almost at the bottom, she swept the area with her Super vision and caught a glimpse of him waiting in a grove of trees off to the side. She liked that and toyed with the idea of falling, so that he would have to come out to her and they could finish together. She was concentrating so hard on him that she didn't see the young intermediate skier coming from her left, and they almost collided. To avoid hurting the boy, who shouldn't have been where he was, she *did* fall , and when she looked up she saw Jack hurrying toward her, yelling at the other skier who hadn't even stopped. "Are you all right? What a dumb thing for that kid to do!" "I'm fine. And just what were you waiting for over there?" He looked sheepish. "Okay, you caught me. We finish together, but I get to buy lunch." They laughed, as he helped her up, and they skied to the end of the run. After eating a lunch neither of them remembered, they spent the afternoon on the sun deck, laughing and talking. They had wine and dinner. Afterwards they had a brandy in the bar and went back to her room where he kissed her once lightly, twice warmly; then they stopped counting as she returned his kisses with an eagerness equal to his own. He pressed her to him so that he could feel her delicious softness against him, and she molded herself against his muscular body. Their kisses deepened and eager tongues were exploring and tasting, exciting feelings that were both old and new. Laura was not inexperienced sexually, but what she had known stemmed more from her scientific curiosity than her emotional reactions. Now she was feeling new sensations, intense tingles in places in her body that had been only mildly aroused before. She wanted more, quickly and without thinking of consequences. Her tongue explored demandingly and she moved her body against him sensuously. Jack's response to her grew with her every motion against him. He lifted her in his arms and carried her to the couch before the fire, settling her on his lap. She was kissing his face and neck, running her hands over his chest and back. Her body was aflame with acute sensations heightened beyond any of her previous encounters. An unknown world was opening for her, promising unpredictable delights she had only imagined. Her breath was coming rapidly in short almost inaudible gasps as she gave herself over to his desire. Without either of them being aware of it, they began helping each other remove articles of clothing, and her gradually revealed beauty was overwhelming. The effect she had startled him. Exploratory hands were followed by hungry devouring kisses as they mapped each other's bodies with the eagerness of a Burton or Speke searching for the headwaters of the Nile. Jack had known many women, some as a part of his work, others as easy conquests readily available to while away a boring evening. He had made use of them, but they had left no lasting emotional impression on him, and he quickly forgot them all. He was unprepared for the unexpected rush of emotions Laura provoked in him. She had a sweet innocence that he found refreshing and somewhat intimidating coupled with a wanton abandon that expressed her intense reaction to him. It was a fascinating and intriguing combination that inflamed his senses to a peak he could not remember ever reaching. With any other female, he would have shown no reluctance. But with this incredible woman he hesitated. He wanted to make no mistake in this, their initial lovemaking, for that was how he thought of what they were in the midst of. Not only were they truly 'making love', but it was the first of what he wanted to be many times, maybe a lifetime. It was a thought with a potential that puzzled and even scared him a little. "Jack, please," she gasped. "I know," he answered, and lifted her in his arms to carry her to the large bed across the room. Was it his imagination, or did she feel lighter than she had the first time he carried her - almost as though she were floating? He laid her down gently and lifted himself over her, as she continued urging him to commence their dance of love. He responded seeking the collaboration that would lead them to unity, and found a fantastic new world where pleasing her was all that mattered. He reveled in striving to send them both into an orbit culminating at an apogee of perfection. She was flying as she had never flown before , higher and faster in a dizzying and uncontrollable whirlwind of sensation, light and sound until she burst into showers of tiny sparks exploding into the sky like a giant fireworks display, then descending gently, gradually, luminescence slowly disappearing. They lay, returning to themselves, gradually realizing who they were and where they were and marveling at the ferocity of what they had created together. And as the shining remnants of their explosion faded away, they knew at last what it was to love with body, mind and soul and to want to give and receive everything, holding back nothing. They never left each other again. For two days they made love and lounged in the hot tub at the spa, ordered room service or went to the dining room, sat on the sun deck or walked into town. It didn't matter what else they did as long as they were together - except skiing, which was out of the question because they couldn't touch each other, or look into each other's eyes or hurry back to his room or hers to make love again. By the end of the second day, he had asked her to marry him 19 times, and 19 times she had demurred, first saying "I can't", or "We need to get to know each other", or "Why do you want to marry me", and then "I'll think about it", and "Maybe". He persisted, saying, "I love you" in as many different ways as he could, and she would answer, "I love you too, but..." Then, at 4:30 in the morning of the third day, after they had made particularly sweet and passionate love, he looked into her eyes and said, oh, so seriously, "Laura, darlin', I've told you I love you every way I know how. I've *shown* you I love you every way I know how. Please say you'll marry me. We can't just stay here in this room makin' love for the rest of our lives. We have to make a decision. I know you love me. We could be married tonight and spend the next two weeks in Paris having a sensational honeymoon. Or we can fly out of here and back to Metropolis and plan whatever kind of ceremony you've always wanted. But please, just tell me you'll marry me, so we can start living the rest of our lives together." Without answering, Laura got out of bed, put on her robe, and went to sit on the couch by the fire. He followed and sat beside her. She regarded him with grave eyes, and began to speak hesitantly. "I do love you, Jack. I really don't make a habit of picking up adorable men on my vacations and spending days with them in sexual abandon." Her discomfiture was apparent. She continued nervously: "And I *do* believe that you love me. That's why I have to tell you something before I answer you. And you need to know that what I tell you will give you incredible power over my family. I don't believe you would use that power, or reveal what I tell you to anyone else, but I don't know if you'll still want to marry me after I tell you; and that's all right, because I would understand, but you need to tell *me* if I'm right about you, and that if you know this thing, even if you don't want to marry me any more, that you won't use it and you won't tell." She was almost pleading with him, now. For the first time in her 29 years Laura had lapsed into "Lois babble", so she was as surprised by it as he, who had never heard anything quite like it before. "Do you practice that?" Re-asserting her Kryptonian control, she continued, "I'm serious, Jack. Be serious with me. Don't make jokes. Tell me what you think." "I think that unless you and your family are vampires preying on innocent blood victims, there is no way that I would *not* want to marry you or that I would ever betray your secret, whatever it is." "Well, we're not vampires, but what we are, is almost as hard to believe." "Then just tell me, sugar. It can't be as bad as you're afraid it is." She took a deep breath and began. "My father is a very special person." He nodded. She went on. "He isn't from Metropolis. He grew up in Kansas. But he wasn't born there, either. In fact." She took another deep breath. "He wasn't born anywhere on Earth." He looked at her expectantly, waiting for a punch line. "So he was born on a space ship, or a space station? There's nothing wrong with that. He isn't even disqualified from being elected President, if they're U.S. territory." "Think for a minute, Jack. We're not talking about my brother; we're talking about my Dad. When my Dad was born, we didn't have any space stations or any space ships big enough to carry families. At least Earth didn't." "What are you saying? That your Dad...Wait a minute. C'mon. You're kidding. You're saying your Dad is some kind of alien?" "I suppose there are a lot of different kinds, but yes, my Dad is an alien. He came here in a space ship as a baby in 1966 from the planet Krypton. He was adopted by Martha and Jonathan Kent of Smallville, Kansas, where he grew up. Later he went to Metropolis to work at the Daily Planet, met my Mom who wrote about him, and he became...Superman." "Your Dad is Superman." He looked skeptically at her. "Yes." She nodded, soberly. Still looking at her, now warily, he said, "Okay, let's say I believe you. How could that make any difference about whether or not I want to marry you?" "Because there's more. You know how there's not just Superman any more? There are other Super heroes." "Yes, there's Ultra Woman and there's The Defender." She could see incipient comprehension his eyes. He gaped at her. "You mean you... you're..." She nodded, watching him apprehensively. "I'm Ultra Woman, and my brother Chris is The Defender." She stopped, waiting. He stood dumbfounded, staring at her, his mind moving in ten different directions at once. He eyed her up and down, looking for some physical evidence of Super being. She was beautiful and sexy and an incredible lover, but he saw nothing supernatural about her. He walked over and kissed her. No, that was the same kiss he'd tasted for two days, but he didn't think it was Super power that made him feel the way he did about it. He walked around her, observing her in minute detail. She sat, composed, enduring his scrutiny. He continued circling, his mind working. "Nope", he said. Her heart lurched and she let her head drop slightly as a look of disappointment fleetingly passed over her face. She closed her eyes briefly, then opened them, and raised her head again resuming her stoic countenance. "Nope" he said again. "No difference I can see. Still the same woman I fell in love with. Still the same woman I want to marry, even if she can beat me up if she wants to. Gosh, honey, promise you'll be gentle." She stood and ran to his arms, and for a few minutes, there were smiles, soft murmurs and sweet kisses. Then he said, "Wait a minute. I've taken this on faith, but I think you better prove it to me. Do something spectacular." "Anything?" "You can do that many spectacular things?" "Well, more than one. I think this is probably the most spectacular. At least it's the most fun." And with that she floated up to the ceiling, lifting him with her. "Whoa! What a great sensation! You must save a lot on airfare." "Actually that's true. We could go to Paris this way." She descended lightly and placed him back on the floor. It took a minute for her words to sink in. "Are you saying 'yes'? That you want to get married today and honeymoon in Paris?" "Yes, my love, I'm saying "yes" to you for the rest of our lives." He picked her up and whirled her around, yelling, "Yeee-haaa!" He put her down and kissed her hard. Then he kissed her softly; then again, passionately; then hungrily. Then they celebrated their impending nuptials in the way of all lovers since love began. "Dr. Forrest?" Laura's reverie was interrupted by a lab assistant asking her to sign off on the data from a completed experiment. She looked over the material, recognized it as something she had already critiqued and signed, sending him on his way. Returning to her thoughts, she remembered how happy they had been when she had called home to tell her parents about Jack. When they had hung up the phone after breaking the news to Lois, Jack had looked at her and said, "Well, that was a masterful bit of manipulation if I ever heard one. Are you sure you're not in *my * field?" "I was just practicing a bit of the art I learned at my mother's knee, and believe me, *she* knew exactly what I was doing. I didn't fool her for a second. But by the time we get back, she'll have Dad happy and ready to meet his new son-in-law." They had been living a dream when they came back to Metropolis from their honeymoon. Clark was over being angry, but he was wary on first meeting Jack. Jack, with his innate charm and obvious love for Laura, soon made a friend of Clark, and even managed to overcome Lois' inherent skepticism about his frequent compliments to her. They were a happy family. And when Laura became pregnant in their second month together, they were sure that they had found paradise. But when Laura was in her sixth month, Jack's brother, Jeff, was killed in a hit and run accident in Prague, and at his funeral, Henry Forrest had taken Jack into his study for a long discussion. When Jack came out, *he*, her Jack, had disappeared. In his place was a cold and distant Jack, who was going back into the family business to take his brother's place. That was all he would tell her. And she was suddenly shut out of the central part of his life. He continued to be concerned for her in her pregnancy. He very much wanted their baby, even if he no longer seemed to want her. She hoped that after a while, the loss of his brother would be ameliorated and he could ease himself away from his father's influence and come back to her. But that didn't happen. Then their son, whom they called Lee - Jeff's middle name - was born, and Jack was overjoyed. He seemed to once again be the man she had met in Switzerland. In the hospital, he called her "sugar" and "darlin'" and held her hands and told her how much he loved her and how proud he was of her and their son - how they made all the difference in his life. And then Henry Forrest came to see his grandson. She knew they were quarreling in the hospital corridor, but, preoccupied with breast-feeding Lee, she only caught fragments of what they were saying: "... already registered... Citadel ..." "...unregister...not going..." "...grandson will...won't stop it" "... *will* keep...safe..." "...killed your brother..." "...kill me..." "...son... take...place." "...wife...never..." "Pressures...brought..." "...who...dealing with." "...I can do..." "...leave...alone!" "...agreement." And they walked away down the corridor so that she couldn't hear if they did reach an accord. When Jack came back into her room he looked somber and troubled, but when he saw her still holding Lee to her breast and cooing sweet nonsense noises to him, his face softened, and he gazed at his wife and child with a winsome tenderness. She had watched his face change as he saw her, and her heart reached for his as they shared this moment of warm affection. But it was only a moment. His troubled gaze returned as he asked her, "Does Lee have your Super powers, do you think? Is he safe from harm the way you are?" She had looked at him in surprise as she answered, "I don't know, Jack. I hadn't thought about it. I would guess that he probably doesn't have any powers now. Chris and I didn't until we reached adolescence, and neither did Dad. Lee could be different in his development, but it wouldn't seem likely. Eventually he could have powers or no powers or some and not others. Why do you ask?" "Well...you know...well..." He paused, his face showing an embarrassed flush, and then he continued hurriedly, "Fathers get very protective when they see how small and defenseless little babies are. I'd just never thought about it until I saw the two of you together just now." He gave her a brief, self-conscious smile. She grinned at him, delighted that he felt such strong emotions for their child. He smiled back, and after another pause went on. "I worry about you too. Are you and Chris and Clark completely invulnerable?" Pleased at his concern, she replied, "As far as I know, we are. Chris and I have never come up against anything that affected us, but I've heard Mom and Dad talk about something that was a problem for him before we were born...what was that called?" She thought for a moment. "It was something about Krypton...oh, I remember, Kryptonite. It was a kind of green glowing rock that came along with his space ship when Krypton blew up. But I don't think there's been any of that around for years." "And nobody knows about your Super powers or about Kryptonite except the family?" "A few other people have known in the past but I think they're all dead now. My, you really are into this protective father thing, aren't you?" "Believe it!" She saw the serious set of his face as he continued, "So Clark doesn't think anybody around knows about Kryptonite or has any?" "Ask him. I told you as far as I know there's none around anymore. It's all gone." "It had better stay gone," Jack stated firmly. "I don't want anything or anyone hurting my family in any way." The way he said it made her wonder if its meaning went beyond what they had been talking about. They had passed a pleasant afternoon and when he kissed her goodbye, she had been sure that their troubles were behind them. But the next morning he had stopped by only briefly because he was on his way out of the country again. The light was gone from his eyes, and he was once more that remote person she felt so distanced from. ++++++++++ Laura's sad eyes regained their focus and she saw that another packet of research data had been placed in front of her but she had no idea who had left it there. Her private unhappiness was beginning to dominate her life and she couldn't ignore it any longer. Maybe it *was* time to talk with her mother. +++++ ++++++ Last night I thought I found you; I saw it in a dream: I was tangled in the rushes, baby; You were caught up in the stream; And the more I tried to reach you The more you slipped away; And when I woke up in the darkness I was callin' out your name. There's a shadow in the garden, And it's coiled around our hearts. Won't you help me to believe you, baby? Won't you show me where to start? The more I try to reach you The more you slip away. I want to wake up in the darkness And hear you callin' out my name. You and I we dance around it; Why is the truth so hard to say? We long for true love, well, We've found it. It's one belief away. Bonne Raitt, Paul Brady, Dillon O'Brien In the Kent townhouse kitchen, Clark poured two cups of decaffeinated coffee, added cream and 4 lumps of sugar to one and two teaspoons of sucreme to the other. Lois had gratefully received this calorie-less fat free, all natural substitute for sugar and cream when it had been introduced several years earlier, at precisely the time when she had begun to find it harder to keep her weight in check and had begun to worry more about the artificial ingredients she had been using. He smiled as he remembered her elation when she realized that she wouldn't have to give up 'doctoring' her favorite beverage. How he wished they were as at ease with one another now as they had been then. The change was mostly his fault. He had wanted to protect her from watching his painful death. Dr. Klein had told him, just after Lois's birthday in October, that he would die in a particularly unpleasant way because of Veda Doodsen's youth- sucking experiment, and he had acted stupidly - running away from the woman he loved and cruelly telling her to start a new life without him. Fortunately, Klein, Doodsen and Laura had figured out a way to save him when he finally returned to ask for help, but Lois had not forgiven him easily for showing a lack of faith and trust in her love for him. They had talked things through on a December day at the farm, and she had admitted to being partly to blame because they had fallen into complacency in their marriage, practicing on each other what she called the Seven Deadly Sins of Lois and Clark: pride, anger, arrogance, nobility, silence, subterfuge and fear. Even though she had taken the lead in their reconciliation, and they were working to put their lives together again, there was still a watchfulness, a hesitancy on her part that kept them from completely returning to the affectionate ease which had characterized their relationship for so many years. He missed it; he wanted it back, but he didn't know how to get it. Indeed, he didn't know if it was possible to return to something they once owned but had, between them, managed to transmute. Wisdom counseled that you can't go home again, but oh, how he wished they could! The circle of life allowed one to look back, perhaps even repeat one's mistakes, then learn and maybe change oneself in the future, but it did not allow a return to the past. No use yearning for what could not be; better to concentrate on how to move their lives toward the symbiosis he longed for. He heard her emerging from the shower and went up the stairs with their coffee. As he entered their bedroom, he smiled, said "Good morning!" and placed the cup on her dressing table. She turned briefly from the mirror to smile back and say, "A-a-h, coffee!" She sipped, then continued, "You've saved my life, again." "That's what I'm here for," he answered, watching as she toweled her short hair into a mass of wet curls. He bent to kiss the back of her neck and while she didn't visibly stiffen, he felt a cloud separate them, a cool, invisible haze which sometimes formed between them. He hadn't been able to figure out what triggered it or how he could prevent it. There were times, like last night, when they were as passionate with each other as they had ever been. There were other times, like now, when she was cordial and friendly, but a shadow would fall between them. he told himself. It would take time. And, after all, he was a very patient man when it came to waiting for what he wanted. +++++ +++++ Later that morning, Lois rode into work alone. The town car that usually took the two of them to their respective offices in Gates Tower seemed icy in the grey morning light of a cold January day, and she burrowed deep into her heavy coat. But she knew that her chill was due more to her reaction at Clark's show of affection after she came out of the shower than to the snows of winter. She was dismayed by her inability to overcome...what? She didn't understand why she could not regain the sense of amiability she once had with Clark, an amiability born of long years of love and trust. Heaven knows she loved him and she had forgiven him for losing faith in her last October. Hadn't she? Intellectually, she understood the reasons for everything that had happened and she wanted to put the whole experience behind her. But apparently she was still wary emotionally. There was just a tiny corner of her heart that was not yet ready to trust completely. The car stopped at a concrete, glass and exposed steel skyscraper on Bridge Boulevard in downtown Metropolis. She got out and hurried inside where she caught the elevator for the 52nd floor, home for CHILD headquarters. The decision she and Clark had made to work with different organizations after their retirement from the Daily Planet had been a good one. If he had worked with her here at CHILD where she was president and chair of the board - a legacy from CHILD's founder, her Aunt Liz - he would have had to be her employee not her partner, but they knew from experience that such an arrangement didn't work. And CHILD was too important to her, personally, for her to consider doing anything else. Clark had chosen to ally himself with WERC, using his skills and talents to do what was important to him: bringing countries of the world together to save the earth and its people by working toward common economic and environmental goals. Even though they no longer worked side by side, their offices were on adjacent floors and they frequently were involved together in finding solutions for common problems. As she stepped off the elevator, Lois thought, . Clark had made a detour to pick up his dinner jacket for a social event they were attending that evening - a charity auction and dance benefiting Metropolis services for the homeless. He usually had appropriate clothing in the dressing room at his office, as she did, but his jacket was at the cleaners after a waiter had dumped a tray of canap‚s on it at a recent dinner. She really wasn't looking forward to this evening. Marshall Stewart would be there, and his presence was sure to exacerbate the already strained state of affairs between the Kents. Clark had never liked the playboy millionaire, and was angry when she gave him a place on CHILD's board of directors. But Stewart was wealthy and influential, and, regardless of Clark's apparent jealousy, which had become worse since the events of last fall, she needed his contacts for CHILD fundraising. Once she would have blithely used her sexuality to cajole her husband into a good mood, but after they had admitted, while talking at the farm, the manipulative ways they had dealt with each other in the past - their seven deadly sins - she thought twice these days about using her wiles to turn him around to her point of view. Arriving at the 52nd floor, Lois hurried into her office, pausing at her executive assistant's desk. "Good morning, Caroline. Your cheerful face is a real treat to see. Has the mail come yet?" Caroline, giving her boss and friend a happy smile, replied, "Good morning to you too, and yes, the mail is here. You have some phone messages too. I put them on your desk." "Way ahead of me, as usual," said Lois, heading for her office door. "Please tell me the coffee's ready and waiting." Laughing, Caroline shot back, "I wouldn't dare tell you it wasn't. I'd be out on my ear." Inside her executive suite, Lois hung up her coat, poured a cup of coffee, sat at her desk and sorted through the phone messages first. Most were concerning administrative details that Caroline could handle, but one was from Laura. She turned on her visi- phone and punched the insta-com for her daughter's private line at STAR Labs. Almost instantly the face of a younger version of Lois appeared on the screen. "Laura Forrest. I'm away from my desk right now. Leave a message with your com number and I'll get back to you as soon as I can." Lois punched in Laura's personal communicator number and waited. In a moment she heard, "Laura Forrest here." "Laura, it's Mom. What's up?" "Oh, Mother. Thanks for getting back to me so quickly. I'm in the middle of something pretty complex right now, but could we have lunch and would you mind making the arrangements and leaving a message for me? I've really gotta go." "Sure sweetie. One o'clock okay?" "Just let me know where. See ya." "Click." Lois heard the disconnect and turned off her visi-phone screen. She tapped her intercom and said, "Caroline, could you come in for a minute." Caroline entered with a formidable stack of computer printouts, which she placed in front of Lois saying, "These are the accounting reports from the National Bank of Metropolis, the Bank of America and the National Bank of Ecuador concerning their receipt and dispersal of funds for volcanic disaster relief." Lois regarded the hundreds of pages of tiny type with dismay. There went most of her day. She picked up her mail and the remaining telephone messages and, turning to Caroline, said, "I haven't looked at the mail, yet, but unless it's from Maria in Guayaquil, I don't think I need to see it. Would you take care of it as well as these phone messages. Looks like I'm going to be spending most of my day immersed in the finances of Ecuador." Caroline took the material, saying, "Don't worry about it, Lois. I'll take care of this stuff," and she turned to leave. "Thanks, Caroline. Oh, yes and would you make a lunch reservation at Julia's for Laura and me? One o'clock. Also leave her a message at STAR Labs about the place and time. And no calls except for my family...or the President," Lois finished with a chuckle. "It's done," said Caroline, closing the door. By 12:15 she had barely touched the stack of data, but had consumed a pot of coffee and was on her second. She leaned her head back, removed her reading glasses and rubbed her eyes. Caroline poked her head in and said, "Lois, shall I call a Town Car for you? Your luncheon appointment is coming up and it will probably take half an hour to get to Julia's because of the traffic." "Yes, please, and thanks for the reminder, Caroline. I need a break from these tedious figures. I may take a little extra time since I'm meeting Laura. Have there been any calls?" "Nothing important. Marshall Stewart left a message that he was looking forward to seeing you tonight. That's about it." Ten minutes later Lois was on her way to the elevator, stopping to tell Caroline, "If Clark calls, tell him where I am and that I'll talk to him as soon as I get back." With that she was out the door and in the elevator down to the Bridge Boulevard entrance level and her waiting Town Car. Lunch at Julia's was special for Lois and Laura. Mostly vegetarian, it had flourished for many years through the patronage of healthy diet-conscious Metropolitans. Beginning with Laura's sixth birthday, Lois had made it a habit for the two of them to have a 'ladies lunch out' appointment at least once a month at Julia's. It had made her daughter feel very special and had given the two of them time for bonding conversation that wasn't possible in the noisy Christopher-imprinted Kent domicile. As the airfoil glided past familiar Metropolis landmarks, Lois wondered if Laura was finally going to confide in her about her problems with Jack. Her mind went back to the night when she first learned about her daughter's love for the man who was now her husband. ++++++++++ It had been 1:00 a.m. when the telephone rang at 348 Hyperion Avenue. Lois had woken in bewilderment to find her reading lamp on, her book overturned on the bed and her husband gone. "Brrrrng" "Brrrng." "Okay, okay." She reached for the porta-phone. "Hello" she said, uncordially. "Mommy? Did I wake you? I'm so glad *you* answered." "Laura? Is something wrong? Are you back already? Do you *know* what time it is?" "It's about 7 a.m. here, I think. Everything's fine. In fact, it's perfect! I ...we just couldn't wait to tell you." 'We'. The word leaped out and hung in the air like an Olympic competitor in a perfect swan dive, just before turning down to enter the water. Lois caught her breath. "You're still in St. Moritz then? What's up?" She waited for the splash. "Oh, Mom, I met someone, and it was just like Dad always said it was when he first met you; I didn't think I could ever feel this way, and I'm so happy, I just couldn't wait to tell you; I know you'll love him as much as I do." "We love each other so much, and we just couldn't wait; well, it just seemed so practical, since we were here..." She paused, then went on in a rush, "so we got married last night and we're going to Paris for two weeks for our honeymoon." "Well, I...I...I don't know what to say." "Say you're happy for me, Mommy. Say you're glad I finally found Jack and that you've always wanted me to find the man I can love forever." "I am all of those things, sweetheart, if you *have* found the man you can love forever, and Jack is that man; it's just that I don't know him." "But I do, Mom. Trust me. Show me that you trust me to know my own heart and make this decision, even if it might seem hasty." Lois sighed inwardly. She knew her very Kryptonian Laura would not do anything without being sure that it was right. For 29 years she had hoped for her daughter the joy and happiness that loving someone completely could bring. If Laura thought this Jack was the guy.... no, if Laura believed this Jack was the guy, then he must be. All that remained was to welcome him into the family, and <...Oh god...tell Clark!> "Oh, sweetie, I'm so happy this has finally happened for you. I've wanted it for so long. It might have been kinda fun to plan a Metropolis wedding, though. Give your Dad a chance to get used to the idea? How *do* you plan to tell him? And when do we get to meet Jack?" "Oh, Mom, I love you. Thank you for understanding. We'll be in Paris for two weeks and then we'll be home in Metropolis. And you'll love Jack, really." "So you will be living in Metropolis. If you're staying on at STAR Labs, can you be gone that long?" "I still have a lot of accumulated vacation time plus some emergency time. I think this is an emergency, don't you? I'll call Uncle Bernie and arrange it. There shouldn't be a problem. Anyway I brought some work with me, so he shouldn't complain too much." "Honey, if you can work during your honeymoon in Paris, you married the wrong man." Very seriously she said, "No, Mom. Believe me...I didn't." "I believe you, my sweet Laura. But you're ignoring an important question I asked you, and it has to be answered. How are you going to tell your Dad? Or is that why you were glad I answered the phone, because you want me to do the dirty work?" "Oh, Mommy, that would be so great if you would. You know you can do it so he won't get all mad and punch holes in walls the way he did sometimes when I was a teen-ager. And I couldn't bear it if he treated Jack suspiciously, especially since Jack knows all about us." "You *told* him?" "I wasn't going to marry him under false pretenses. You should understand that better than anyone." "Yes," Lois sighed. "I certainly do. All right, I'll get you off the hook, but you owe me big time." "And I always pay my debts with interest, starting with, say, five pounds of Swiss Chocolates?" "I'm not sure my waistline will be happy about it, but I won't turn them down. Now, is that husband of yours handy so I can welcome him to the family and tell him what will happen if he ever makes you cry?" "Yes, he's here. You can welcome him, but no threats!" And so Lois spoke for the first time with her new son-in-law, making the appropriate remarks, and liking the way he sounded, especially when he talked about Laura. He seemed as much in love as her daughter and that eased her mind. But she still had a big problem on her hands. After hanging up, Lois had confronted that problem. How was she going to tell Clark without setting off an explosion of nuclear proportions? His enlightened attitude toward females disappeared whenever his daughter was involved. He would come home tired from whatever this current emergency was and he would want to sleep. Tomorrow was Saturday. She sighed. This was *not* going to be easy. But she had managed and Clark had even liked Laura's young man until...What could have happened to change him so and to make Laura so obviously unhappy. Lois thought as the Town Car came to stop in front of the restaurant. ++++++++++ "I know you're disappointed. So am I." Laura was speaking to her research team at Star Labs. "We thought we won, today. That we solved the puzzle of the Ristocki Virus, but we didn't. We were almost there, but we missed." The Ristocki Virus was named for the careless and ill-fated space investigator who had disobeyed protocol and removed a glove to touch a furry object while exploring an asteroid. When he had returned to Earth, the parasite virus, which had burrowed into his hand, had bred rampantly, finding this planet's atmosphere most congenial for reproduction, and had literally devoured its host for sustenance. "What do we do now?" asked Nancy Miller, the group's lead virologist. "Do we start over or do we concede that we can't beat the deadline?" Laura quickly replied. "We know that our research colleagues around the world have worked for months to discover a way to kill this bug. No one has succeeded. Earth Consortium is demanding that someone find the antidote by April one. Well, we're on the verge of isolating its DNA. As soon as we do that we'll be able to meet that challenge. We're not giving up. We can do it, but we need to step back and rest for a bit. So it's time to take a break." "This could put us way behind everybody else. What's the point?" demanded Danny O'Brien, one of the new biologists under Laura's supervision. She looked around at the downcast faces. They were tired and out of sorts. She wasn't going to let them stay that way. "You're tired and you need some personal time. I want you all to go home and forget about the lab for a while. Relax, have some fun. See a movie, eat a gourmet meal...make love," she paused and grinned at them. There were chuckles all around, and she sensed the relaxing of the tension they had been under. "Then get a good night's sleep and come back here at 8:00 in the morning prepared to go eighteen hours straight if we have to. We have the brightest and best team in the world working on this problem, and we're going to lick it!" She gave them a confident smile, nodded her head and ordered, "Go!" Smiling in return, the members of the team scattered in twos and threes, beginning lively conversations and animated debates. Glancing at her watch, Laura saw that it was quarter to one and realized she would not have time to take a taxi in the noon traffic. She could have just flown herself to the restaurant, but she needed a little while to unwind from the morning's pressures and to think about what she would say to her mother. She decided to catch a Bubble Trolley, the transparent lighter- than-air transport that regularly made scheduled stops on the roofs of the major Metropolis buildings. It provided a people- moving alternative to the crowded public street and subway level services. The one o'clock would deposit her at the roof dock of the Amerasian Trade Tower by 1:10 where a five-minute elevator ride would place her at the door of Julia's only a little late. After running up the stairs to the STAR Labs roof, Laura opened the door and saw she was the only one there. She ducked into the waiting shelter grateful that there was no one to distract her so she could concentrate on how to broach the subject of her marital problems with Lois. Lois knew that she and Jack were having problems. Laura's whole family knew it. But they had no idea about the kind of home life her marriage had deteriorated into. How should she begin? She let her mind go back to this morning's events, and how pleasant things had been for a while. ++++++++++ "Gotcha," Lee was yelling, as he pushed down on Jack's shoulders with his whole body. He almost had him pinned on the family room floor, but Jack was moving and rolling to prevent that from happening. They were wrestling, a favorite game, and passing time before breakfast. Hot, non-fattening vegetable oil sizzled as Laura cubed tofu and dropped it into a skillet while carrying on a conversation with Carla who was sitting in her high chair smooshing bananas in a bowl. "Sweetie, you're getting very good with that spoon. Can you show Mommy how to put the bananas in your mouth instead of your hair?" Carla responded by scooping a spoonful and turning it over into her hand so she could push it between her fingers. Then she held up her hands so Laura could see them and gave her mother a beatific smile. "Oh, yes, you're very accomplished," said Laura as she turned the tofu to brown on all sides, "but are you big enough to spoon those bananas into your mouth?" A tiny pucker appeared between Carla's eyes as she considered the idea that she might not be able to achieve this feat. At that moment she bore a strong resemblance to her Gran, another lady who did not like to think there was something she couldn't do. "Now I've got you," shouted Jack, who had rolled over and was about to pin his son. But Lee was too wiggly to allow Jack's final victory, and, feigning great effort, the big man gradually succumbed to the boy's elusiveness and fell away. Laura removed the now crisp tofu, drained most of the oil, and reduced the heat in the skillet. After setting root vegetable sausage patties into the oven to warm, she beat six free-range eggs adding a little soymilk and a touch of vanilla and waited for the heat of the frying pan to lessen. Watching Jack and Lee as they laughed and tumbled, she was aware of how very gentle the tall, rangy man was with the boy. The love Jack felt for his son and the trust that Lee invested in his father were clear to see, and Laura's heart felt a hollow pang of longing for the similar relationship she and Jack had once shared. At moments like this one, she was reminded of how much she had loved him...still loved him...and of how much she wanted their previously warm and loving relationship back. Sometimes she believed there was a similar yearning in his eye when he thought she wasn't looking, but they were both paralyzed by uncertainties and unable to act in any positive way. They had adopted a watchful, distant dance, skirting each other carefully and politely, avoiding discussion of any real issues between them. "See, Mommy. I do it." Carla was apparently ready to shovel bananas into her mouth, and was finishing her fruit with gusto. "Oh, what a wonder you are!" praised Laura. "You are Mommy's wonder girl. Daddy will be very proud of you, too." Carla's banana-filled smile epitomized the happiness that Laura felt at the way the morning was going. Noting that the pan was now cool enough for the eggs, Laura called out, "I'm putting in the eggs." Jack, with a final cry of surrender, allowed Lee the ultimate triumph as both shoulders touched the floor. "C'mon champ, let's go wash our hands and straighten up. Mom won't like it if we sit down to eat her terrific breakfast lookin' like street urchins." "What's street urchins?" asked Lee as he trotted after his dad. "Little boys with dirty hands and faces, messy clothes and uncombed hair," answered Jack as they disappeared around the corner in the direction of the bathroom. ++++++++++ Back atop the STAR Labs building, the sound of the Bubble Trolley, or 'the Bub' as it was generally called, dropping onto its landing pad, recalled Laura from her reverie. Looking like a transparent ball, the Bub contained seating for about fifty people. Outside on top of the vehicle was the bow or link that in the 20th century would have connected to an overhead electric cable or ground track that provided power for trolleys. In 2033 there was no cable. Instead the bow was a receiver for a magnetic radio beam whose varying frequencies emanated from the rooftop landing pads around the city. The bow automatically shifted to the next frequency when it reached a pad. Suddenly a loud electronic voice intoned, "Board now. This trolley will depart in 30 seconds. Mind the gap." The voice repeated itself in a countdown at five-second intervals. Laura rose and climbed aboard, inserting her all-purpose pay card into the slot as she did so. "Welcome aboard, Dr. Forrest," a cyber voice responded. She found a seat and looked through the transparent side of the module. As it silently lifted up and floated away, her mind floated also - returning to that morning. ++++++++++ After they had finished their breakfast, Laura had activated Kama, their nurturing cyborg nanny, and left her with Lee and Carla to clean up the kitchen. Under Kama's supervision the children helped with the chore, clearing the table and carrying the dishes to the sink. Two-year old Carla insisted on 'helping' by pulling at dishes she could barely touch standing on tiptoe. "Please be careful, Carla," instructed Kama. "Don't forget to help your sister, Lee." Lee, who was always very watchful over his sister, would catch the plate or cup before it tumbled and hand it to her to carry to the sink. Laura had gone off to the bedroom to finish dressing for work and Jack had come into the room behind her beginning to remove his sweatshirt and pants as he prepared to shower. Releasing his breath, he spoke, "I have to go down to D.C. today; Henry wants to see me. Don't know how long it'll take. I'll let you know if I have to stay over." He said this, head down, not looking at her as he removed his sports shoes and socks. She replied also looking away, "Okay." Standing with her back stiff and straight, on guard against him, she heard him say, "When I come back, maybe..." The tone in his voice had alerted her and she had turned to watch him. "Maybe?" There was a softening in her voice and even a touch of hope. "Life is full of maybes, isn't it?" he answered lifelessly as he went into the bathroom. "See you tonight or tomorrow." The door closed behind him. And that had been the end of what she considered a 'good' morning between them. ++++++++++ Refocusing her thoughts to the present as the Bub arrived at the Amerasian Tower, Laura disembarked, hurrying to the elevator, which would take her to the street level where her mother waited at Julia's. On the ride down she reflected that she hadn't worked out any strategy for discussing her domestic problems, but it really didn't matter since, she supposed, once she mentioned the subject, Lois would take charge and ask enough questions to lead them where they needed to go. Over the years, Laura and Lois had developed a friendly relationship with Julia's staff, who welcomed them warmly and seated them in a pleasant, well-lit but out-of-the-way booth where they could enjoy their privacy but not be seen by the lunchtime crowd. Both women were well known in Metropolis and might have spent their entire lunch hour greeting friends and acquaintances were it not for the consideration of Julia's employees. Julia herself always stopped by to say hello, take their orders and determine how much privacy they really wanted. Today their disinterest in the menu told her that serious conversation was in the offing, so she saw to the quick preparation and serving of their meal and left them to talk with only unobtrusive visits to refill coffee cups. She instructed the attendants to wait for clearing until the two women had departed. Mother and daughter had greeted each other with affectionate hugs and settled into chitchat as they carefully worked their way toward the agenda of their meeting. Lois mentioned the charity ball that evening and asked if Laura and Jack were attending. Laura replied that Jack had gone to D.C. to meet his father so she would be staying home. Lois asked about her grandchildren; Laura related an amusing little tale about Carla trying to catch ducks in the park and crying because they ran away from her. They both laughed, then paused. The pause lengthened and became empty silence. Lois watched her daughter intently. Laura looked away. Finally Lois said, "Was there something in particular you wanted to talk with me about, Laura?" "You know what I want to talk about, Mother. Help me out here. Where are those famous penetrating Lois Lane questions that I can answer and we can get on with this?" "This isn't an interview, Sweetie. I'm not here to pry; I'm here to listen to whatever you want to tell me. The quicker you say it, the easier it'll be." Laura looked down for a moment and then into her mother's eyes. She saw the love and concern she had seen all of her life and realized that she could just let it spill out, that her mother would never judge her wrongly and would support her in whatever way she needed. "Mom, you know Jack and I have been having problems. You know, Dad knows, Chris and Helene know; everybody knows. I'm surprised I haven't read it in Metro Mattie's gossip column. I've tried to work through it by myself, but we seem to have reached a dead end; I don't know what else to do." Her tone signaled the misery she had been feeling for so long. Lois reached across the table and covered Laura's hand with hers. "Tell me what it's been like for you, Laura. Has Jack verbally abused you? Is he seeing another woman? What is it?" Laura's eyes were startled as she quickly replied, "Mom! Oh, no, it's nothing like that! Before your birthday party, he drank a lot and made a fool of both of us in public, but since then he hasn't been drunk and he's treated me with complete respect. He's a wonderful father. You can see, when he's with the children, how much he loves them. But with me...oh, he's polite and considerate...but he's just not there any more. We've reached a point where we just kind of ignore each other." "Do you think something happened to make him change?" "I've thought about it over and over again. What could have happened? Did I do something? Was his brother's death such a shock that he couldn't get over it? I know he's unhappy working for his father...argues with him, but I don't know why that should affect us?" She stopped for a moment, looked away thinking, shook her head in bewilderment and continued. "It started right after Jack's brother was killed, and he went back to work for his father. It was like a light was turned off. We were in love and together; everything around us was bright and happy. Then without any explanation, Jack was gone. We weren't together anymore; he was off in the dark somewhere and I was all alone. After that we were each living in separate little spaces, occasionally bumping into each other, overlapping and pulling apart. Now we say only what we have to and hardly even look at each other. It's awful and cold and lonely." Lois thought for a moment; she didn't want to suggest it, but it needed to be said openly. "If you don't love each other any more, would it be better to acknowledge that and split up?" Laura was very still, her face closed and frozen. At last she spoke. "Maybe I made a mistake about Jack. I've asked myself that a hundred times, afraid of what the answer might be. Was I wrong to trust him? Was I wrong to love him? But the answer that comes back to me is always the same - a strong and unswerving conviction that he is the man I was meant to spend my life with, to give my life to. Regardless of what he feels for me, I love him. I can't imagine loving anyone else. "He may have changed from the way he was, but in some ways he's still the man I fell in love with. I know without asking that he's been faithful to me. Whenever he's hurt or unhappy, it's me he wants. He's known our secret since the beginning, and he could have betrayed all of us years ago, but he didn't. He's been steadfastly honorable about that. "Whatever has come between the two of us, every now and then I get a powerful feeling that he still loves me and wants us to be as we were; but something strong and terrible is preventing that. I wonder if it has something to do with the work he does for his father, and if he could back away from that maybe we could put things back together. But other times I think perhaps that's just the way marriage is, and I want too much from it." Lois looked down at the table for a moment and then full into Laura's eyes. "Relationships do change after you've been married for a while. You get used to each other, and you make mistakes because of that, because you forget that you have to work just as hard at keeping your relationship solid when you've been married 35 years as you do when you've been married five." "Is that the voice of experience I hear speaking?" asked Laura. "I'm afraid so, and it's an experience I would have preferred to forego. But let's deal with your problem. It doesn't sound to me as though Jack is taking your relationship for granted. It sounds more like he might be unsure of his commitment. Is that a possibility?" "I don't know, Mom. That's the problem. I don't know!" "What do you want to do, sweetheart?" asked Lois. "I want to know what happened to us. I want to close this separation and make us happy again, be a real family for Lee and Carla." "Do you know how you're going to do that?" Laura smiled faintly at her mother saying, "I was hoping you'd be able to tell me that." Lois smiled back wryly. "You have way too much faith in my abilities to make things right, honey. The best advice I can give you is what your Gramma Martha used to tell me whenever your Dad and I were at loggerheads. She would say that we had to talk with each other about it. Her favorite words were, 'Communication is key'. She was usually right. We learned that all over again when we talked at the farm in December. It can't hurt and it might be just what you need." Hesitatingly, Laura asked, "But what if I find out something I don't want to hear? What if he doesn't want me anymore? What if he's just been trying to find a way to tell me?" "Yes, there's always that possibility. But if that's the truth, then isn't it better to know than to continue believing in a concealed lie?" Laura sat absorbing her mother's gentle and loving nudge toward reality. It was good advice and was nothing she hadn't known herself, but something she had avoided acknowledging. "You're right, Mom, but it's pretty scary to face. I don't know if I can." Lois was now on very solid ground. "You can do whatever you put your mind to, Laura. You're strong and brave; and whatever happens, you'll be able to handle it. And you know your Dad and I will support whatever you decide you have to do." Mother, wanting so much to reach out and make everything all right, watched daughter struggle inwardly, thoughts vacillating. Finally Laura came to a decision. "Thanks, Mother. As soon as Jack comes back from D.C., I'm going to sit down with him and make him talk with me." She stopped for a moment, testing her emotions and continued, "Isn't it funny? Now that I know what I'm going to do, I'm not so afraid anymore. I'm sure I can do it. In fact, I feel certain everything's going to be okay. Talking with you has turned out so much better than I thought it would!" Lois laughed. "Sounds just like Gramma Martha and me." She sighed, wishing that Martha were still around to hand out advice. The quiet in the restaurant called Lois's attention to the time. Her watch told her she needed to go back to her office. "I don't know about you, sweetheart, but I have some work on my desk calling me. Let me know right away, how things go, will you? Remember, I'm your mother. You can always cry on my shoulder or share a chocolate sundae to celebrate your happiness." With a promise to talk by phone later, the two parted as they had met, with a loving hug and hurried away to return to their professional worlds. ++++++++++ I was born under a bad sign, I've been down since I began to crawl. If it wasn't for bad luck, I wouldn't have no luck at all. Bad luck and trouble's my only friend, I've been down since I was ten, 'Cause I was born under a bad sign. Booker T. Jones and William Bell Entering the revolving door of a small, shabby hotel in Washington, D.C., the tall, fair-haired man crossed to the stair door, eschewing the entrapping confines of the elevator. Taking the steps two at a time, he lightly ran up to and around the first floor landing, continuing on until he was out of sight of the ground floor entrance. There he waited for a few minutes, barely breathing, as he listened for sounds of anyone else in the stairwell. There were none. He continued up again with light, silent steps until he reached the fourth floor. Once more he paused, listening. Reassured, he cracked the door to the hallway and checked both directions for human presence. The hallway was empty. Slipping silently through the doorway, he turned left and paused before the door of 427. He stood, rethinking his resolution to make the final break with this business that he abhorred. He thought about what he had learned from Laura the day Lee was born: of Lee's complete vulnerability to Henry's threats; of Kryptonite, which could harm even Super beings; of Lois and Helene, dependent on the protection provided by their Super husbands who were frequently away, leaving them open to Henry's vengeance. Even if Henry had no knowledge of their Super personas and of Kryptonite, he could still destroy the Kents' reputations. Henry's contacts were so varied that it was conceivable that he not only could destroy their good names, but also could learn of their alter egos, expose them to the world and obtain Kryptonite to destroy them physically. Jack was courageous and strong-minded, but he feared what his father could do to the people he cared about. If he were crossed, Henry was capable of the worst kind of retaliation. Jack loved the father he remembered from long ago, but the man on the other side of the hotel room door was a stranger who had begun exhibiting unusual and unpredictable behaviour. Because he had decided that it was time to break away, Jack was nervous about meeting with Henry. When they had made their initial bargain, his father had promised to let him go after five years, and the five years were almost completed. Jack knew he had to stop leading a double life - deceiving Laura, neglecting their relationship, giving his allegiance instead to his father and the company that dominated his life. He couldn't go on with it; he was destroying himself and had probably irrevocably destroyed Laura's love for him. He had to stop what he was doing, and he had to persuade - somehow convince - his father to let him go. But Henry Forrest was not a man easily persuaded to do anything he didn't want to do. The two of them never met at the company or in one of its well maintained offices and hotel rooms in the D.C. area or Metropolis. Henry liked to keep his business operations as secret as possible from his superiors, explaining that administrative red tape just got in the way of success. And he was very successful at what he did, handsomely rewarded monetarily and accorded well-deserved accolades in terse but complimentary memos circulated throughout the company and on up the chain of command, some going to the very top. He kept even those who worked for him at a distance and relied completely on only a chosen few. In the last several years the reliable had dropped to a solitary digit - Jack's brother, Jeff. Since Jeff's death, Henry Forrest had demanded that Jack return to the business and assume Jeff's responsibilities. Henry had used threats and coercion to bring him back to a life he had rejected and had been determined not to return to. In the end Henry had won, but Jack had insisted that he would only work with his father for a limited time and Henry had agreed. Now Jack wanted to call in that promise. The door was unlocked as expected and, turning the knob, Jack entered a small room containing a bed, a nightstand and lamp, a small chest of drawers, and a single wooden chair. One narrow window overlooking an airshaft allowed a minimum amount of light, which was enhanced slightly by a dim bulb contained overhead in a dirty, fly-filled receptacle. The worn carpet on the floor documented the footsteps of hundreds of previous occupants crossing to the bed and into the small adjacent bathroom. Henry Forrest was seated on the chair reading, his briefcase on the floor beside him. Looking up at his son, he said, "You're late, boy. Lock the door." The tone in the rebuke and the command brooked no explanation or argument. Gesturing peremptorily for his son to sit on the bed, an inferior position to his own, Henry Forrest continued, "I have a top priority assignment for you, and it must be completed at once, without tardiness or your usual bungling. I must be able to depend on you to handle this with the alacrity and expertise that your brother would have exhibited." "I do my best, sir, but I'm not Jeff." Jack spoke with grim sadness. "I try but I can't be him and I can't take his place with you." Henry Forrest's words were short and sharp. "No you can't. But we must both make the best of it. Now, about your assignment. We have some assets in Russia, the Ukraine and the Czech Republic that must be liquidated. It must be done without arousing any governmental interest or suspicion. I leave the means to your discretion, but for god's sake take care to do it properly. Everything must be untraceable! Do you understand?" Jack was looking at his father with horror in his eyes and he rose from the bed in agitation. "Papa, this will destroy many people who have been our friends, who have risked everything to help us." "They've served their purpose. It's time for us to withdraw." "I can't do this, Papa. We have to talk. I came today to ask you to let me go as you promised. I can't live this life anymore. I'm destroying everything important to me, and I won't inflict any more damage on people who have been my friends." Henry Forrest regarded the other man with contempt. "I've always known you were weak and soft. You're just like your mother. I indulged her and she repaid me by making you worthless to me." Trying not to wince at the words, Jack said, "Mama taught me the value of love and what it means. I found a love like that with Laura. It's very strong in her family. I hope I haven't thrown it away because of what I've done for you." Glaring at Jack, the elder Forrest said, "I made a mistake with you by allowing you to spend time with your mother instead of teaching you to be hard, the way I taught Jeff, the way you must be to survive in our world. Well, your mother became ill and escaped my retribution by dying, and Jeff had to be sacrificed because of his unanticipated negligence. That means you'll have to fulfill my plans." "Let me go, Papa! There are people better than I am at doing what you want. You'll be retiring in just a few months. You don't need me any more. Let me go." "There will be no retirement," Henry Forrest replied in a matter of fact tone. Then he spoke in cold simplicity, "Do I need to explain to you again what will happen to your wife, your children, her family if you don't comply with my wishes?" Jack faced his father angrily. "No, I won't do it. Not any more. I won't live this life anymore. I won't run any more errands for you, I won't liquidate any more assets for you, and I won't cut myself off from my wife and children anymore for you. I'm going to live my life the way Mama would have wanted me to and if that makes me soft and weak in your eyes, then you won't have to see me anymore." The older man continued with icy calm as though the younger man had not spoken. "Very well, I will reiterate the inevitable consequences of your obstinacy in this matter. Your wife's professional reputation and that of her family will be ruined; you will be an outcast with no family and no job. Your wife and her parents will be killed in an unfortunate accident, and I will become the guardian of your children who will then be properly trained to continue what I and my father and his father before him have built. The Forrest legacy in the service of the company will go on. And you'll be helpless to prevent any of this. You know I can do what I say, and that I *will* do it unless you comply with my orders!" Jack slumped down on the bed, wishing that he did not believe that his father would carry out his threats. His mind raced through the alternatives he had calculated so often since his father had first warned him of his dire intentions. He could tell Clark, Laura and Chris and enlist their help, but what if Henry knew their secret and he had obtained Kryptonite? What if Henry moved against Lois, Helene, Lee and Carla before they could stop him? What if Henry had a plan already prepared to expose the Kents' secret to the world. And even if he did none of that, what if he destroyed their reputations, trampled their integrity and turned their carefully constructed well- respected lives into despicable trash? There were too many unknowns. Jack had decided long ago that his fealty to Henry was a small price to pay for securing the safety of this remarkable family. Now that he knew that his father would not live up to their bargain, he was prepared to do what was necessary to break with him, even though his action would endanger the Kents. He thought he could stop his father from carrying out his threats, but he believed he would have to do it alone. Jack needed time to think. He had to get out of here and away from Henry Forrest. It was better to let his father think he was defeated and compliant. It was always better to let Henry think he had won. Jack feigned a weak reply. "Yes, Papa. All right, Papa." Henry Forrest nodded and handed Jack a thick manila envelope. "Here are the details. You can fly out of here, tonight." "Please," Jack pretended to plead. "I'd like to see my family before I go." "Very well, as long as you don't take too long. It can't hurt for you to be reminded of what you have to lose." Turning away from his son to take up his briefcase, he said absently, "You may leave this hotel first. I'll stay a while longer. I have some reports to read." With that dismissal Henry Forrest gave his attention to the briefcase papers, now oblivious of his son's presence. Jack left the hotel, as he had come, in silence. He decided to take the bullet tube back to Metropolis, as he did not have a flight reservation. Crossing town, applying Moscow rules to elude anyone who might be following him, he entered the transport station and hurried down to the lowest level, again taking precautions to evade followers. Noting on the overhead schedule screen that another train was due in ten minutes, he stood on the platform and concentrated his thoughts on what his immediate tactics should be. He had made up his mind about his strategy before he had seen his father, and he wasn't changing it. He wanted his life back. *His* life - a life that included Laura and his children and excluded Henry's twisted world and what he proclaimed as important. He had to begin with the assumption that his father could make good the foreboding consequences he had so frequently held over his head. What could he do about that? He couldn't tell Laura anything yet, but maybe Chris would help. Yes, he would go to see Chris when he got back to Metropolis. He glanced at the clock on the wall and saw that it was 4:15. He would be in Metropolis in 30 minutes and with any luck, Chris would still be at the Daily Planet. Seeing his train pulling in, he stepped away from the stone pillar against which he had been leaning. As he did so, someone bumped him from behind, said "Sorry", and moved quickly away and up the stairs to his right. He just noted the shadow of the figure as he turned and raced for the quick-closing doors of the speedy transport. ++++++++++ Our love is kind of stalled, Baby, But it ain't about the sex; I'd trade the roses and the negligees If we could just connect. I go deeper when you look into my eye;, There's a place Where neither one of us can hide. And it's up to us to reinvent the game; Love it when you call my name and, Meet me halfway, Ain't no doubt about it, baby, Meet me halfway And we're halfway home. Bonnie Raitt, Annie Roloff, Beth Neilson-Chapman It was almost three o'clock when Lois finally got back to her desk at CHILD. Her lunch with Laura had been wrenching and she wasn't sure how productive. She wondered if Laura would follow through on what she had decided to do. This speculation could have occupied her for the rest of the afternoon, but those accounting reports were still staring at her and she felt an urgent need to get back to them, if for no other reason than that she had a niggledy impression that something about them was not quite right. She stood up to fortify herself with another pot of coffee but decided that she couldn't face more caffeine after the espresso permeated lunch and chose to make herb tea instead. Ten minutes later, her cup filled with a strong aromatic brew of her favorite chamomile, she donned her glasses and began, again, to peruse the columns of figures. By five o'clock her unease had grown, but she couldn't put a specific name to the cause. Time for a Super consultation. She buzzed Caroline and asked her to ring Clark. He was in a meeting and not available until 5:30. Leaving a message for him to call her, Lois returned to those pesky figures. , she thought. Clark called at 5:32. "Hi, honey. You rang?" "Well, you sound cheerful. Must have been a good meeting. And you'll be even more cheered to know that I can't get along without you; I need your help with something." "I keep telling you that. Shall I come down now?" "Well, we have to eat before going to the Black and White Ball - you did remember to pick up your dinner jacket, didn't you? Anyway, we have to eat so why don't we have something sent in and we can talk then. Come down after you dress, say around 6:30. We should be at the Pan-World ballroom by 8:30." "Okay. I'll take care of getting the food; what would you like? And yes, I have my dinner jacket, Mom." She smiled and said, "Chinese from that little place you-know- where would be great, but it might be a little messy for our evening clothes. Why don't you just get a pizza from Guiseppi's? I had lunch with Laura and I'm not all that hungry." "Sounds about right. I think I can handle anything you don't eat. You want a salad too? You had lunch with Laura? Is that the subject for our discussion?" "No, we'll save that one for later. It's business. A salad? Sure. See you at 6:30...Clark?" "Yeah?" She paused for another second as she corralled her thoughts, and then said, hesitantly, "Sometimes I forget to tell you how much I love you. I think I forgot to do that this morning, but I do, you know. Love you. More than anything." Her voice had dropped and her words were soft with emotion. "I know," he said huskily, "but it's nice to hear, especially when I love you so much more every day." He spoke quietly, "See you at 6:30," and hung up. Standing very still for a moment he recalled the morning chill between them and said to himself Lois held the receiver to her heart for a moment, bending her head over it and closing her eyes to stop the tears. Then she straightened, set the phone in its cradle and walked over to her dressing room to shower. ++++++++++ What goes up must come down, Spinning Wheel got to go around. Talkin' 'bout your troubles is a crying sin; Ride a painted pony Let the Spinning Wheel spin. Someone is waiting just for you; Spinning Wheel is spinning true. Drop all your troubles on the riverside; Catch a painted pony On the Spinning Wheel ride. David C. Thomas When Jack walked into the bullpen of the Daily Planet, Chris had just finished sending an article to his editor. One more exciting story about the water department's concerns that rainfall was low for the last six-month time period and there maybe could be a drought. Or maybe not. It was not the kind of thing he really cared about, but he had given it the good old Kent try, so he figured Eli would fill some space with it. What he really wanted to work on was that story about the erosion of foreign aid funds. He was pulling the file up on his computer screen when he realized that someone was standing almost out of range of his peripheral vision. He looked around and was surprised to see his brother-in-law. "Jack! Hey, man, good to see you. It's been a while." "Yeah, Chris, that's what I'd like to talk to you about. Have you got some time?" Chris had liked Jack when he had first met him; and he had always felt that there was an explanation, one that no one knew, when Jack's personality and his feelings for Laura had seemed to change. The serious look he now saw on Jack's face was enough to get his attention. This was not the foolish, shallow man he had seen for the last few years. "I'll make time for you, Jack. I have a couple of hours before I have to get home. There's a big society bash tonight and Helene is expected to make all the young Metropolis males happy by attending. You wanna get a bite? There's a great Thai place down the block that's mostly take-out. We can get a booth in the back and be virtually alone." "Sounds perfect. Can you go now?" "Let's do it." The Thai Kitchen was empty when they arrived, so they ordered at the counter, took a couple of beers and settled into a booth in the back. They saluted each other with their bottles and drank, then were silent. Chris waited expectantly as Jack gazed into the distance, apparently putting his thoughts in line. Finally, he spoke. "Five years ago, my brother was killed in a hit and run accident. He was my father's favorite and it was a great blow to the old man. For six generations my family has been an essential part of a certain business and our involvement has been at the center of my father's entire life. It's not a business I ever wanted to participate in, but my brother and I were expected to join and we did. "When I found Laura, I had broken away and was trying to lead the life that I always wanted. When we met, she became the keystone of that life. But when Jeff died, my father demanded that I return and take his place." Jack paused, took a swig of beer to wet his throat, and continued. "My brother's death was no accident. Death is an occupational hazard in our business. I can't tell you what that business is - at least, not yet. Maybe never. But you have to understand that it is very dangerous and my father is a very powerful man in it. He can arrange for things to happen..." He stopped again as though girding himself for battle. "When I said 'no' to my father's demand that I return to take Jeff's place, he threatened to ruin and then kill Laura, Lois, Clark, Helene and you. Laura had told me about Kryptonite, and I was uncertain if the three of you would remain invulnerable to anything physical he could do, and I knew Lois and Helene would be easy prey. And he could destroy your reputations. Remember Othello? 'Who steals my purse steals trash...' The company can easily ruin a person in that way. I thought about going to Clark, but I didn't see how Super powers could protect your family name against slander and defamation or even some kind of criminal charges that could be trumped up. I had to cope with Henry on my own. "And finally Henry threatened to isolate me in such a way that the courts would take my children and award custody to him. "I know all that sounds far-fetched and melodramatic, but believe me, he can do what he threatens to do. I had no choice but to agree to his terms. But I made demands of my own - that when he retired, I could leave the business for good. He consented with the proviso that, in the meantime, I withdraw from being close to Laura and your family. He wouldn't budge on that stipulation, so I had to comply. He said that my only family had to be him and the company. "I hated what I was doing. That's why my behaviour changed so radically, and why I've acted so badly. I had to withdraw and concentrate on the jobs he sent me on. In a few months he will face mandatory retirement and I've reminded him of our bargain. He says he isn't retiring and that neither am I. He has also sent me on a mission that I won't carry out. I plan to break with him completely. I'm telling you this because when he learns what I'm doing, he will follow through on his threat, and I hope to enlist your help in keeping your family safe until I can take certain steps that will stop him. Will you help me?" Chris answered immediately, "Of course I'll help you. Why wouldn't I help protect my family...our family? You're one of us too, Jack." "You wouldn't want me to be, the way things are right now." Jack paused and finished, "Maybe I can earn my way back." "What will you do?" "I can't tell you specifically. What I can tell you is that I'm leaving for London on the midnight flight out of Dulles and before I go I'll be calling my father to tell him that not only am I not going to do what he ordered, but I'm going to ensure that no one else can either," Jack answered. "It's probably a stupid thing to do, but he is my father. It's the last time I'll honor him in any way." "What do you want me to do?" "After my father hears what I have to say, he'll begin to take steps to harm your family. You need to become the eyes and ears that track what he's doing. I'll give you the names of some people who have access to lines of communication in every city and every business in the world. My father is powerful, but I've made a lot of friends who have reason to dislike him. Working with them you have to discover anything that might be a danger to the Kent family." "And if something turns up?" "They will know how to get in touch with me. As soon as I hear from them, I'll contact you and we'll go from there. We'll wait to tell your parents until we know something definitive." "Okay. Sounds like a 24-hour job. I could be called away as The Defender, you know." "Unless it's a catastrophic emergency, try to beg off and let Clark and Laura take care of it. Just for a short time." "What about Laura?" Chris queried. "Are you going to tell her any of this?" Jack looked down at the table, and then full into Chris's face. Jack's expression of pain was visible evidence of his internal conflict. "I can't tell her, Chris. I hope someday I'll be able to, but I can't now. My father...I've done some horrible things. Things I don't think even you could accept. Until I can somehow atone for them, make up for what my father and my family have done, I can't let her know. I'm not afraid of very many things, but what I fear most is what I'll see in her eyes when I finally tell her the truth about me." "She loves you," responded Chris. "Even with all that's happened, she still looks at you with love in her eyes. I've seen it there behind the hurt." A shadow of guilt crossed Jack's face. "I know I've hurt her and it's one of the things I hate myself most for. I don't want to hurt her anymore. That's why I may never tell her." "You'll still keep secrets from her?" "No. There won't be any more secrets because there won't be any more me." Chris started to protest, but their food arrived, and while they ate Jack diverted the conversation to give Chris the data he needed to put their plan into operation. ++++++++++ Love walked right in And drove the shadows away; Love walked right in And brought my sunniest day. One magic moment And my heart seemed to know That love said hello Though not a word was spoken. One look and I forgot The gloom of the past; One look and I had Found my future at last; One look and I had found a world Completely new, When loved walked in with you. Ira Gershwin At 6:30, Clark and the pizza arrived at Lois's office almost simultaneously. He came first, with a happy smile and an eager question in his eyes, as he strode toward her. She thought, and was almost in his arms when she heard a discreet "A-hem" from Caroline and saw that she was carrying a flat box topped by a small square one. "Shall I put this on your coffee table for you?" she asked. Lois nodded, and Caroline, completing her task, turned toward the door saying, "I'll say good-night now. A car will be downstairs for you at 8:00. Enjoy your evening at the Ball!" Lois said, "Thank you, Caroline. See you tomorrow," as the other woman closed the door. She knew Caroline was gone because she heard the sounds, but she saw only Clark, and then she was in his arms and he was kissing her, not wanting to let her go until they were in danger of forgetting that they were dressed for an important engagement and had business to attend to. Reluctantly, she pulled away. "We should continue that later...?" she asked breathlessly. "Yes," Clark answered. "I think we should." She busied herself getting plates and utensils from the kitchenette area, calming her galloping pulse. He was watching her and she felt the waves of tenderness mixed with desire. As she opened the pizza box, the waves broke and were replaced with another kind of hunger. She breathed more easily - emotional tension dissolved for the moment. The luxury of Lois's executive suite, which was donated by the William H. and Melinda Gates Foundation, had proved to be a necessity for receiving the national and international politicians and celebrities she depended on for CHILD support. And on the many nights like this when she and Clark had to attend some important function, it meant extra work time that might otherwise be spent in going home and changing for the evening. Clark started to sit down, then said, "Oh! I left a bottle of wine on Caroline's desk." He retrieved it, opened it at the wet- bar and returned with two wineglasses, which he filled. Looking at her, he said, "To later," and drank. She nodded, smiling and drinking. Then they attacked the pizza and salad. As they were eating, Lois explained to him her concern over the financial reports from Ecuador. "I'm no dummy about financial reports, but there are hundreds of accounts here with ten or fifteen transfers every day over the last few months. I can't track all that in my head, and something doesn't 'feel' right. After finishing her slice of pizza, she brought the stack of printouts from her desk. Lowering his glasses, he quickly ruffled through the several hundred pages, then consumed another slice of pizza in three bites, staring straight ahead as his mind sorted through what he had seen. Finally he spoke. "The numbers add up as they should. The computers would have caught any discrepancy there. But the results from that amount of money being pumped into the recovery don't seem quite right." "Yes, that's just what I thought! There doesn't seem to be enough actually happening. By this time, shouldn't a lot more homes be almost completed and people out of those refugee camps and back in business?" "Sometimes it takes a while to really get things underway," he replied. "Maybe we're expecting too much, too soon." "I don't think so. You know how patient I am." He looked at her skeptically, one eyebrow raised. She smiled in response and amended, "Okay, so I'm not *always* patient, but I think this goes beyond reason. Something is definitely very fishy and I think we should go down there and see what's going on." Clark took her hand. "Honey, I have to go back to the Congo for a few days to wrap up some loose ends from the trip last fall. If you can restrain yourself until I get back, we'll go down to Ecuador together." "So, if I practice being patient, maybe we can mix a little pleasure with business?" "A little time away together might be just what we need," he murmured, cupping her face in his hand and kissing her. Wanting to deepen the kiss, but aware of their obligation and the time, she drew back, saying, "Deal," and stood to gather the dishes and carry them to the kitchen sink. He watched her - oh, how he loved the way she moved - and thought that patience seemed to be a very important word in their lives right now. He sat back, relaxed and content, a satisfied smile on his face as he watched his wife move from counter to refrigerator. She gave him a meaningful look and, grinning, he stood saying, "Yes ma'am. Coming," as he picked up the food cartons and walked over to her. ++++++++++ Before catching the bullet tube back to D.C., Jack needed to go home and pack a bag. He looked at his watch; it was not quite 7:30. He didn't know if he wanted Laura to be there or not. Ambivalently, he hoped Laura would be working late because he wasn't sure he could face her; but he also wanted to see her one more time, in case something happened that would make it impossible for him to return. He hadn't lied to his father when he had said he wanted to say goodbye to his family. Grabbing a taxi, in a short fifteen minutes he was at the door of the suburban house that he and Laura had found just after Lee had been born. Located on the outskirts of the city where there were tall trees and grass, it was the perfect place for children to grow up. He had known that Laura also hoped it would be a place where they could find themselves again, but he had had to steel himself against thoughts of that kind, just as he needed to now. He could not afford to think of happiness with her until this was over. And the things he would have to do might make that future impossible. When he opened the door, he heard Carla chattering cheerfully. He found her in the kitchen with Lee and Kama, who was preparing dinner. The cyborg sensed his presence and turned to say, "Hello Mr. Jack. So nice to have you home this evening." Her melodic electronic voice was pleasant to the ear, although the speech patterns tended to be a little stilted. There were imperfections in these models that the robotic scientists were still tinkering with. "DADDY," shouted Lee who launched himself into Jack's arms, as Carla, shrieking "D-a-d-d-e-e-e-e," wrapped her arms around his legs. "We are always enthusiastic to see you," continued Kama, as Jack gave his full attention to his children for a few minutes. After an interim of bedlam, Kama spoke again. "Lee, Carla, it is time for you to set the table." From his position at eyelevel with his progeny, Jack rose and asked Kama, "Is Laura home?" "She is working late but we are expecting her..."she stopped, cocking her head as though listening, and finished, "now." As she uttered the word, Jack heard Laura's key in the lock. Within seconds, she was kneeling in the kitchen door with her arms full of children. The joy and love in her eyes was the best thing he had seen since their days in St. Moritz and Paris. Then she noticed him and he saw her expression change, becoming guarded and blank. "Hi," she said. "You're back tonight, after all. Everything go okay?" She had stood and was taking off her coat, not looking at him as she spoke. "About the way I thought," he answered. "I have to go to Europe again." He watched, memorizing her every move. If things should go badly, he wanted to be able to recall this entire scene. Such memories had been his only shelter in terrible moments in the past. She replied with the usual "Okay," going into the adjacent room to stow her coat and briefcase in the closet. ++++++++++ The Winter Haven Black and White Ball and Silent Auction was an annual charity event for the benefit of the homeless in Metropolis. All expenses were underwritten by Wunderkind Communications Alliance, a conglomerate of some of the most powerful companies in the world. Three hundred invitations were issued to the rich, the famous and the beautiful people of Metropolis. Lois and Clark, like many others on the guest list, were not rich, but they were famous and their presence, as leaders in the small community that makes up the movers and shakers of any big city, was expected. The monies received in the silent auction and from individual donations would go to provide food, warm clothing and shelter for the homeless during the cold winter months. The silent auction was already underway in an alcove adjacent to a ballroom sparkling with the glittering jewels of Metropolis society when Lois and Clark arrived at the Pan-World Hotel. Since they were unlikely to be bidding on anything, they decided to bypass the auction items for now and circulate amongst the influential guests, cementing contacts who could benefit their respective organizations. Separating, they agreed to meet in the alcove just before the dancing started. Lois spotted Howard Morgan and his new wife, Veda Doodsen, and went over to say hello. Ever since she had been instrumental in saving Superman's life during the crisis in December, Veda had become active in the social and philanthropic milieu. She and Lois were now friends and Lois considered her a co-member with Howard of the CHILD Board of Directors. Clark was talking with Phil Ackerman, one of the top men at Wunderkind, when he saw Marshall Stewart enter the ballroom from the auction alcove and head in Lois's direction. He suppressed the stirrings of jealousy he felt, knowing Lois would not be happy if he had a confrontation with Stewart tonight. Watching them kiss in December still burned his memory, even though he knew she was, at the time, sending him a message to stop hiding and come home to get the help he needed. Knowing why she did it didn't make it any more palatable and his initial mistrust of the man was deepening into something more truculent. Trying to maintain an outward pleasantness with Ackerman, he was, nevertheless, totally aware of every move Stewart made. He began to steam when he saw the man run his hand down Lois's arm and place a longer than necessary kiss on her cheek. He excused himself from the group around Ackerman and was making his way over to Lois, when he saw her break away and head for the auction alcove, and he realized that the orchestra was beginning to play. Lois entered the auction area, relieved to be rid of the oily attentions of Marshall Stewart and began to inspect each of the items. She had reached number five, a beautifully carved ivory figure when she suddenly became aware of what she was seeing. Bending over, she looked more closely to be sure her perception was accurate, and then she straightened, shocked and dumbfounded. Reading the card describing the object, she saw that it was a nineteenth century piece done by a whaler turned artist who had begun working with scrimshaw and had graduated to more complex figures. From the Leffingwell family collection, the piece was valued at $20,000.00. "Oh my god!" she gasped. Clark came into the room saying sarcastically, "Well did you enjoy your little..." but got no further when he saw her face. Alarmed, he approached her. "Lois, what is it? Are you all right? Did that jerk say something...?" Turning to him she said, "Clark, look," and pointed to the ivory miniature. "What's wrong? Has it been damaged?" Then he too bent over to take a closer look at the intricately carved figure of a naked woman poised to step from a gigantic clamshell like Venus rising from the sea. She was instantaneously recognizable to him in every intimate detail. He looked up at Lois, his mouth gaping open. "Honey?" She nodded. "Clark...that's *me*!" They both continued to gaze in horror at the item Finally, Clark said, "Well we'll just buy it. It's really very beautiful, and it would make a great family heirloo - " Lois interrupted. "Clark, we can't afford that!" She was almost wailing. He looked at the bid sheet. "Yeah, we'd have to use an equity loan on our townhouse...Look, honey, nobody else has bid on it. Maybe we could just lowball and get it." He wasn't very optimistic because the donor had probably put a minimum price on it and would reclaim it by giving the charity the bid amount for it. She knew that as well as he and she gave him a dour look. He went on. "Well, honey, nobody's bid on it which probably means that nobody's really looked at it because if they had there'd be a lot of ..." The look she gave him now could have withered the metal-filigreed flower garden that was item number three. He tried again, "Maybe nobody will notice the resemblance," he said in a comforting tone. "You think?" she asked hopefully. He nodded reassuringly. "Why don't we get away from here for now so we won't call attention to it." The worried and unhappy look on her face didn't quite smooth out at that suggestion, but she did let him lead her away. ++++++++++ I'm gonna love you Like nobody's loved you Come rain or come shine. High as a mountain And deep as a river Come rain or come shine. I guess, when you met me, It was just one of those things; But don't ever bet me 'Cause I'm gonna be true If you'll let me. You're gonna love me Like nobody's loved me, Come rain or come shine. Happy together, unhappy together And won't it be fine. Days may be cloudy or sunny, We're in or we're out of the money, But I'm with you always, I'm with you rain or shine, Johnny Mercer After Laura and Jack had finished their supper with Lee and Carla, they spent some time with the children, reading a story together and laughing. Later they tucked them into their beds, kissing them goodnight; then Jack called a cab and quickly packed a bag, while Laura sat on the couch reading some data from her briefcase. Finally, he was ready to leave. How would he do this - say a goodbye that might really be goodbye? She saw him hesitate as he approached her and looked directly at him. "Do you have some time, or do you have to leave right away?" "I'm catching the midnight out of Dulles. It's going to be pretty close. I can't miss the 9:15 bullet." She looked away for a moment, and then turned to him again, determination in her eye. "I had lunch with mother today. She helped me get some things clear in my mind. We have to talk, Jack. If not now, then when you get back, and not when you're in a hurry to go somewhere else." He remembered how he had felt that morning when he had watched her, wanting so very much to put his arms around her, taking time to hold her gently until she had filled him with the serenity and self-assurance that she always seemed to radiate. But he had known that if he approached her, she would become more wary, triggering the guilt that already undermined his confidence. His need to hold her was greater now than it had been this morning. His faith in his ability to be strong enough to complete this break from his father was high, but he had hurt her too often. He did not want to raise expectations that he might not meet. Putting his bag down, he said, "I know. We can't go on with this sham. There's so much you need to know." "Is our relationship a sham, Jack? I don't think so. Something is terribly wrong, but I think we still care for each other." "*Care* for each other? Is that the way you feel? You *care* for me?" He whispered the words he knew he shouldn't say but he couldn't stop himself. "I *love* you. I love you so much I ache with it, and not telling you so every hour every day is like being in hell." She was next to him, pulling his arms around her, putting her arms around him, holding him and saying she loved him too, had never stopped loving him, would never stop loving him no matter what. He held her, letting the vehement force of her emotion encompass and fill him. But he couldn't ignore her last words. Reluctantly he pulled away as her puzzled eyes looked into his. "I wish I could believe that could be true, but some things are very hard to get past, Laura. I've done a lot of things I'm not sure you can accept. If I come back, we'll talk and you'll have to decide." Surprised she shot back, "What do you mean '*if* you come back'?" "You have no idea where I go or what I do. It's almost always dangerous. This time it could be deadly." "Jack?" At that moment the taxi horn sounded outside. After kissing her hard, he grabbed his coat and suitcase, and ran out the door saying, "If I can come back, I will." He heard her call after him, "Don't you dare let somebody kill you, Jack Forrest. That pleasure's reserved for me!" As he got into the cab, he smiled and thought: His mother would say, 'Hang on to her, Jack. Hang on with everything you have and never let go.' He hoped he would be able to do just that. On the way to the bullet station, he automatically checked all of his pockets for the essential items: International identi-card, wallet, money cards; in one jacket pocket he found a note he hadn't seen before. Opening it, he read, "Jack, old friend. Haven't seen you around for a while. What's up these days? Am back in the country for a quick info check. What have you been doing since you left? I'll be gone on a job for a while. Maybe we can get together later." It was signed, "Alex." A company man Jack had worked with, Alex was known as a smooth mover who was able to penetrate almost any operation undetected. He had a straight identity that was a well-hidden need-to-know facsimile. Not even Henry Forrest had access to that information. he thought, realizing that Alex had been the man in the bullet station in D.C., who, in a brush pass, had placed the note in Jack's coat pocket without his feeling anything. He read the note again, puzzling over the comment, 'since you left.' What did that mean? Doesn't he know I've been back for five years? He must have been a deep mole if he hadn't heard that. +++++++++++ There's a howlin' at my window, baby, I hear him closin' in. That green-eyed jackal's got the scent, Knows I'll let him in. He slinks in by me at the fire, More bitter than the cold. And it's a rage as old as Hades That'll sputter on these coals. I'm callin' on the Furies To let the toast begin, I'm roastin' on the spit of love again. Bonnie Raitt At the Ball, Lois and Clark danced and chatted with friends, but he noticed that she kept glancing nervously at the alcove. They saw Helene surrounded by male admirers and Chris, as always, watching from the sidelines. Society gossips noticed the young couple too and made them the subject of their speculations, as they repeated the rumor that the beautiful, brilliant young psychiatrist was unhappy in her marriage. Then Lois and Clark ran into Lucy and Jimmy, and while Lois was involved in a 'slight disagreement' with them about the advantages of daycare versus a nurturing cyborg, Clark slipped away to check out the bidding on the objet d'art. It was no longer on the table. Disaster! Someone must have entered a private bid beyond the appraised value, which had been accepted, and the artwork removed from the auction. There was nothing he could do. Even if he went to the auction administrator, there was no way he could outbid the purchaser for it. The sculpture was gone and Lois was going to be devastated. When he returned to the ballroom, Lois was dancing with Marshall Stewart, in what, to Clark's eyes, was much too close an embrace. He approached them with a thunderous face, which Lois spotted over Stewart's shoulder. She pleaded with her eyes, and he calmed down. They had other, more urgent problems. He tapped Stewart on the shoulder saying, "You don't mind, do you?" as he smiled insincerely. Stewart took his time, still holding Lois in his arms, finally replying, "You have the advantage," and then added so softly only Clark could hear, "for now." He ran his hand across Lois's back and down her arm before finally releasing his touch at her fingertips. "I'll look forward to a longer dance, next time, Lois." He turned and walked away. Lois clutched Clark to prevent him from following and whispered, "Thank you for staying calm, sweetheart. I know you would never want to leave me alone on the dance floor," and she began dragging him along in a kind of wrestling dance. Finally he relaxed and cooperated with the beat of the music. "So, Clark, where have you been?" she asked through slightly gritted teeth fronted by a fake smile. Rejecting his impulse to confront her with what seemed to him to be her continuing interest in having Marshall Stewart touch her, he turned instead to the unpleasant news he had for her. "I was checking out the *object* of our concern." He paused. "And..." she prompted. "It's been removed from the auction. Apparently it's been purchased privately." She stared at him, aghast, her eyes reflecting her misery. "I don't know what we can do, honey. I can find out who bought it, but do we really want to have contact with that person? I mean, maybe he or she hasn't figured out the resemblance. We don't really want to give the buyer an opportunity to notice, do we?" "No," she sighed, "we don't. I just wish we could find out how it could have happened in the first place. I mean how could a Nantucket whaler back in the 1800's have carved something that is so much like me?" He nodded agreement. "In *every* detail." He thought for a moment. "Well, we are soul mates, you know, and H.G. Wells has shown us two past lives, so there were probably others. Maybe I was the whaler and you were my wife...or a mistress my wife didn't know about," he teased. She looked at him scornfully and said, "Or maybe you were just some lowlife, peeping tom, pond scum." "A very artistically gifted one. Too bad we're famous and not rich. I would really have enjoyed acquiring that little piece," he added suggestively. "Why would you want that when you have the real thing?" she enquired, morosely playing the game. "Which reminds me, how much longer do you think we need to hang around here?" He wanted to tuck her under his arm and fly out of the room, but that, of course, was out of the question, as it was much too early for them to leave. It would be a definite faux pas to disappear before midnight. When the dance ended, they separated again, he to join a group surrounding Richard King, owner of the Metropolis professional basketball franchise; and she to discuss the deterioration of press reporting with publishing magnate Lauren Kellerman. An hour or so later, she was making her way over to Lucy, when she found herself seized around the waist and dancing in the very close embrace of Marshall Stewart who said, "I've been looking forward to this." She was unsuccessfully attempting to put a little space between them when Clark appeared. she thought. Lucy, right on Clark's heels, grabbed her by the elbow and said, "C'mon, Lois, let's go freshen up," and dragged her off to the ladies room, leaving Clark and Stewart appraising each other. Clark spoke first. "Why don't we go out on the balcony and get a little air." "My thought, exactly," Stewart replied. When they had stepped outside, Stewart took out a cigar case, proffered it to Clark who shook his head in refusal. After he had lit the tip to flame and achieved a glowing ash, Stewart remarked conversationally, "Smoking a cigar is one of life's sybaritic pleasures, don't you think? I'm relieved we haven't banished this delight to second and third world nations with all the other tobacco vices." He paused, puffing, and went on, "The Cubanos really do know how to produce a premium product. So superior to all those struggling countries who doctor their wares with dependency inducing leaves and grasses to provide an additional kick to their 'smoke'. Nicotine should be sufficient, don't you think?" Clark made no comment but waited for a moment and then spoke directly to the point. "Exactly what is your fascination with my wife, Stewart?" "I should have thought that one need only look at her to understand that." "Back off, Stewart. She doesn't want your attention and I don't like it. You may not have any morals, but she does." "I haven't heard any complaints from her." "Look, you're on her Board of Directors; she doesn't want to offend you. But she's my wife; she loves *me*. Forget about any lecherous ideas you've been hallucinating." "Or?" "I don't think you want to go there." Clark was barely managing to hold his temper. "See here, Kent, you're a decent enough fellow, but you lack the social stature or the measure of wealth that Lois deserves. She belongs on yachts and in sophisticated salons. She should wear diamonds and adorn penthouses, not preside in boardrooms, and that is where I intend to take her. You would be well advised to stay out of my way." So, it was out in the open. Clark was relieved that there was now something tangible for him to attack. One part of him was ready to grab Stewart and let him know, forcefully, how filthily unscrupulous he was, while another was noting how little the fellow knew about Lois. She would loathe being someone's ornament and would probably deck the guy if he actually suggested it. For a moment, Clark was close to laughing aloud at the picture in his mind. But Stewart had not finished. "I do not allow anyone to get in the way of what I want, Kent. Be advised that if you try to thwart me, you will suffer the gravest penalty. And now that we understand one another, I believe I shall return to the party." Clark watched Stewart saunter away, pausing to extinguish his cigar and take in a few deep breaths of the night air. Shaking his head at the arrogance of the man - arrogant, but dangerous - Clark wondered what connections Marshall Stewart had that made it possible for him to make such threats. Who exactly was this wealthy troublemaker, and what was the source of the riches he spent so casually? Clark's reporter's instinct told him that he should find out more about Marshall Stewart's background. Re-entering the ballroom Clark saw Lucy but not Lois. He approached her and asked, "Lucy, do you know where Lois is?" Lucy spoke absently, "I don't know Clark. I think Marshall Stewart took her into the auction room, something about an item he wanted her to see." he shouted inwardly and hurried across the ballroom floor, weaving in and out among the dancing couples. When he entered the alcove, Marshall Stewart was explaining to a defiantly proud Lois, holding the delicate ivory carving in her hands, "When I saw it, I recognized what it was immediately, of course, and knew how embarrassed you would be if it were left to be gaped at by everyone; although its beauty is so great that any person of fine sensibility would find it aesthetically pleasing not sensually titillating. I wanted to save you any concern, so I bought it as a gift for you and had it removed from the auction table. The likeness should belong to the original." By the end of this unctuous little speech, Clark had reached the two of them saying, through clenched teeth, his jaw rippling, "Thanks, but no thanks, Stewart. We couldn't accept such generosity." Marshall Stewart regarded him coolly. "Oh, really? Perhaps you might ask Lois about that." "My wife agrees with me. What makes you think you can..." Lois interrupted dully, "I've already accepted it." "What!" Lois continued, "Thank you for your thoughtfulness, Marshall. Now, I think I'm very tired, Clark. Would you take me home, please?" Clark stuttered. "Wa-wait a minute. What do you mean you've accepted? You, you can't take an expensive - " Stewart interrupted smoothly. "I'd be honored to escort you home, Lois. My car can be here within moments. I'll just get your wrap." He started for the door. Clark grabbed him by the arm, "Wait a minute, buster. You don't take Lois anywhere." He thrust his face close to Marshall Stewart's speaking very quietly, "Stay away from my wife. You really don't want me to lose my temper." Lois said urgently, "Clark, don't. Let's just go." The stricken tone of her voice returned his attention to