Lois Has a Great Idea

By Lanie <shaw@epix.net>

Rated: PG-13

Submitted: October 2002

Summary: Lois challenges Clark to prove he is not attracted to her and gets more than she bargained for. She may have to choose between Superman and Clark.

This is an episode extension of the episode, Pheromone My Lovely. It's my first fanfic. I finally decided to put a Superman fantasy in writing.


Sleep was not going to come easily tonight, Lois thought wryly. Some days were just too powerful to let go of.

Today Superman had kissed her. She sighed. Any other night she would have been happily reliving that kiss, but somehow, to her amazement, her thoughts were elsewhere. Instead of dreaming about Superman's kiss at the airport, she was dreaming about kissing Clark Kent afterwards.

It had begun as a typical , almost flirtatious, bantering session. Clark had accused her of being attracted to him. What a ridiculous suggestion! She wasn't sure why the pheromone had caused her to seduce Clark, she had thought that Superman was the only man she was attracted to in that way.

She hadn't wanted to rub that in to Clark, but then he had had the nerve to deny his own attraction to her. That was too ridiculous to allow to go by unchallenged. Maybe her mind had been addled by kissing Superman because she'd found herself tossing out words which now haunted her.

The scene replayed in her mind relentlessly.

"You are so attracted to me."

"Am not."

"Okay, Clark, enough. If we really want to prove who's attracted to whom, I propose a simple experiment."

There had been something in Clark's expression which should have stopped her right there, but she was on a loose-lipped Lane roll.

"I'm going to let you kiss me. A real kiss, not some schoolboy peck. When we're done, if you can look me in the eyes and tell me you're not attracted to me, I'll believe you. And I will confess any spark of attraction I might feel toward you. Deal?"

"Okay, Lois, but if this backfires in some way, remember whose idea it was."

Clark had almost seemed to look through the building beside them. He'd grabbed her hand, and said, "There's a place behind this office building where we can have a little privacy for this experiment. Come on."

Her stomach had done a strange flipflop. A voice inside had told her to back out, pretend it was just a joke. But then they'd been behind the building, in a grassy area under a tree, and Clark had backed her against a wall, one arm above her head to brace himself. His lips had been inches from hers as he'd said in a husky voice, "Ready?"

She had barely been able to nod her head. In an instant, his lips had met hers and rational thought seemed to leave her. Vaguely, she'd been aware of some kind of meltdown inside her mind and body and had marvelled that such a thing was not just a romance writer's invention.

Finally they'd come apart, breathless. But not far apart. It couldn't have been far apart because in a heartbeat they'd reconnected. This time, Clark had pulled her in tight against him with his hand on her back, while his other hand had tangled in her hair. Her own hands had been inside his sportscoat, wrapped around him, feeling the muscles of his back.

Lois found herself remembering his smell, clean but male, remembering how hard his body felt against hers. Her body was experiencing a kind of tingling power surge that she had only known hints of before.

Now, as she lay in bed remembering, she could feel that tingle again. The memory of it was more exciting than the memory of Superman's kiss, she realized with a shock. Kissing Clark had left her raw with desire for more. Even now, part of her was dying to be in his arms again, thinking up possible scenarios for another encounter.

The thrill of the kiss at the airport with Superman was more from surprise than passion, especially with Lex looking on. She had had the feeling that not only was Superman under the influence of pheromones, but he had seemed to be taunting Lex, reminding him that Superman was the man Lois wanted.

Kissing Superman was something she had been longing for, dreaming of. And up until the time behind that building with Clark, she would have been content just remembering that kiss for the rest of her life.

What might have happened there behind that building if they hadn't heard a custodian dragging a trash can down the sidewalk toward them?

They had broken apart, Clark greeting the man pleasantly, taking her hand, leading her back to the front of the building. Clark had dropped her hand as they'd stood there awkwardly.

Suddenly the sounds of traffic and people passing by on the street had brought Lois back to reality. She'd needed time to sort out the events of this day. She had been afraid of what Clark might say. She had been afraid of what he might not say.

Reverting to no-nonsense reporter had seemed the only option for the moment, so she'd taken a deep breath to get herself under control and had said, "Okay, Kent, look me in the eye, and tell me you're not attracted to me."

Clark had grinned at her. Had his smile always been so endearingly boyish?

"Lois, as reporters, we both know that one test sample is not enough for scientific proof. We need more evidence. The problem is where and when to get it. And just how many tests does a researcher need to make his case? I think there's a lot more work to be done here before I can legitimately answer your question. What about you? Actually, you still look a little flushed," he'd said.

She had hit him on the arm. "Clark Kent, you are impossible. I should have known you wouldn't take this seriously. Just forget the whole thing. I'll see you at work tomorrow."

And now here she was. The woman who, twenty-four short hours ago, would have sworn she was in love with Superman, was now unable to sleep because of Clark Kent.

Did she no longer love Superman? No. She would always love Superman. He was the man of her dreams. Literally. Every night since the first time she'd seen him.

Was she falling in love with Clark? The farmboy? When she'd kissed him, it had almost felt as though she had met her soulmate. She tried to push that thought from her head, only to be plagued by a new question.

Could you love two men at once?

Well, maybe you could, but neither one would be very pleased about it, and there was no question of hiding her feelings from either of them. Clark already knew how she felt about Superman, and the two men seemed to be close friends. What if he and Superman talked about her? They could both end up hating her.

Lois looked at the clock. Two a.m. Maybe if she got up to make some chamomile tea, it would take her mind off these distracting thoughts so she could sleep.


Clark had been flying for hours.

He had been distracted from his thoughts briefly while stopping a convenience store break-in and while pulling a drunk driver to the side of the road and calling a cab for him. Yet, even while performing those duties, the events of the day had consumed his thoughts. And what events they had been!

He had nearly succumbed to the seduction of a pheromone- influenced Lois. That memory alone could warm him if he flew too high. Then there was his moment of inspiration when Superman had kissed Lois while supposedly under the same pheromone influence. That had been highly enjoyable, even more so because Luthor had been forced to watch. He had to admit that he had played that kiss for all it was worth. It was a moment of stolen pleasure, but nothing compared to what had happened next.

She never ceased to amaze him. He knew that his refusal to acknowledge his attraction to her would annoy her and lead to some sort of revenge, but he hadn't expected the revenge to be so sweet for him. Kissing her as Clark was even better than the dramatic superkiss had been. He knew only too well that she idolized Superman, and he had exploited that when he pretended to be under the pheromone influence.

So his pleasure had indeed been guilty, knowing it was wrong to lead her on while wishing she'd rather be kissing him as Clark.

So why had Lois, fresh from kissing Superman, decided to kiss Clark? Was it just out of annoyance with him that she had suggested it? Just to prove a point? Or had her challenge been an excuse to kiss him again, an excuse she never would have admitted even to herself?

He could still remember her reaction to his kiss on the bed at the hotel. He felt sure there was at least a spark of attraction toward him. Anyway, this afternoon, from the moment he grabbed her hand, she had seemed different. It had seemed like she felt the powerful connection between them as much as he did. He'd enjoyed watching her effort to be tough Lois Lane again afterwards, attempting to cover her reactions.

Clark couldn't resist looking in her window as he flew over her apartment. He was surprised to see her sitting at her kitchen table.


Lois was surprised to hear a knock at her door. Looking through the peephole, she was even more surprised to see Clark in jeans and a t-shirt. Taking a moment to look down at her sleepwear tanktop and shorts, she decided she was sexy yet decent. She ran her fingers through her hair then decided that any man arriving at two a.m. could take what he got, and opened the door.

"Clark, what's wrong? What are you doing here at this time of night?"

"Actually, Lois, I couldn't sleep so I went out for a walk. I looked up and saw your light on and wondered if you couldn't sleep either."

"You were right. I just gave up trying to sleep and got up to make tea. Want to join me?"

As she spoke to him, Lois was finding it difficult to keep her eyes from Clark's biceps straining against his t-shirt. His rumpled hair gave him a boyish charm that made her want to reach out and smooth it. With a will of its own, her hand reached up and did just that.

Clark's eyes met hers, and his hand grabbed her wrist, pulling her hand to his lips to gently kiss it.

"Lois…" he said quietly, still looking into her eyes.

Then she was in his arms, kissing him with an aching desire, pushing all logical thoughts and arguments against this from her mind. And then, somehow, Clark had lifted her in his arms and was carrying her to the sofa.

Things were progressing rapidly, and without knowing how it had gotten this far, she was pulling Clark's shirt up, and then he was pulling it over his head. The sight of his chiseled torso, then the feel of his warm skin against her hands as she ran them up his chest, almost finished her.

Yet something about the way Clark was gasping her name made her think of Superman. And a terrible guilt came over her, taking the edge off her heated desire for Clark.

He had never said so, but she knew Superman needed her. She was sure he had no real girlfriend and felt sure that if he could have one, it would be her. Sometimes when he talked to her, she could almost feel him gaining strength from her presence. If he knew she was in a relationship with Clark, it might restrain him from coming to her. Often she felt such loneliness in him. No wonder. Who did he have to talk to? Who cared about him, beyond what he could do for them?

With a tremendous effort, she pushed Clark gently away and sat up. She looked at him, not wanting to hurt him either. What she saw surprised her. Clark looked hot and flushed. Lois realized she had never seen him look even warm before.

He also looked confused and worried. Lois felt terrible. She wanted him desperately, and she didn't want to hurt him any more than Superman. Why, why, why did this have to happen? She had gone so long with no man in her life, and now she knew she was in love with two.

"Lois, I'm sorry if I was rushing things. Or if I just read this whole thing wrong. I probably don't have the experience with women to know what they really want. It just seemed…"

Lois put her finger on his lips. "Clark, no, you read this exactly right. Stopping you just now was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Part of me would like to drag you into my bedroom right now and not let you out for a week."

He looked pleased but still confused.

"You were perfectly right about me being attracted to you. Who knew just how right you were!"

"But things are going too fast?" he asked.

She hesitated, not knowing how to put it. "Clark, how well do you really know Superman?"

"Is that what this is about? Am I still playing second fiddle to him with you?"

"All right, you have every reason to be jealous, but so does he. I'm not sure how this happened, but I think I'm in love with both of you. Oh, I know Superman's not in love with me, but he needs me. He needs me to be available for him emotionally, I'm sure of it. He just can't say it. On the other hand, I've never wanted any man as much as I want you. And you're my closest friend. How great would it be to love a man who is also my best friend? Do you see the dilemma? I feel awful when I should be feeling wonderful to be starting a relationship with a man like you."

Lois looked at the floor, trying not to cry, afraid to look at this incredible man to whom she had just said those dreadful words. She waited for him to walk out on her, waited for an ultimatum. Instead he surprised her by pulling her into his arms and stroking her hair as her head lay on his chest.

"You know I didn't go into this unaware of your feelings for Superman. But you are going to have to make some decisions, Lois, and you need to talk to Superman before you can do that. I'm going to contact him to ask him to come over here tonight, unless you're too tired?"

"It doesn't matter how tired I am since I can't sleep anyway."

"Then I'll get in touch with him. Whatever you decide, it won't change how I feel about you, although it may change how you feel about me. I'll either be a friend who loves you or a friend who is your lover."

"Clark, you are the most amazing man. I expected you to be walking out on me by now. Instead you're…" Lois let out a sob. Clark sat her up, lifting her chin to look at him.

"I do have one stipulation. I want you to kiss Superman just the way you kissed me this afternoon."

"Clark! Why do you want that? And what if he objects?"

"He may have super powers, Lois, but in other ways he's a red-blooded male. Believe me, he won't object to kissing you."

"But, why?"

"I guess I have to know if you really are equally attracted to us both. I want you to have all the information you need to decide who you want. Call me when you're ready to talk again. Bye, Lois," he said as he kissed her gently and rose to leave.

"Okay, Clark, but if this backfires in some way, remember whose idea it was."

Clark grinned, recognizing his own words, and left.

Lois decided to put a robe over her sleepwear. She wasn't sure how to approach this thing with Superman. Her relationship with him wasn't on the same comfort level as her relationship with Clark. How would he react to her proposal to kiss him?

She didn't have long to worry about it because soon she heard a whoosh and he was standing in her living room.

"Lois, Clark tells me you need to see me."

She couldn't remember when she had last felt so uncomfortable. Damn Clark for suggesting this.

"Superman, I'm really sorry to take you away from whatever you were doing, but…" She had to get this right, and every way she thought of to say it sounded galactically stupid. "I'm sorry if this sounds crazy, and I know the only reason you kissed me yesterday was because the pheromones were affecting you, but, Superman, would you mind kissing me again, just once?"

She had barely gotten the words out when he stepped toward her and wrapped her in his arms and kissed her. It was intoxicating. It was smoldering. She could barely stand up, so it was just as well that he had her molded to his body and was holding her firmly in place.

This was awful. This was the worst possible reaction she could have had. This was exactly how she had felt when kissing Clark.

He separated from her just enough to speak. "Was this what you had in mind?" And his lips were on her neck, working their way down her nearly bare shoulder as he slipped off her robe.

Lois felt as though she were falling into a pit of pain and pleasure. This was solving nothing. She wanted Superman every bit as much as she had wanted Clark. How could she feel the same way with two different men in a matter of minutes? She could hear herself telling Clark that his idea had indeed backfired.

Then something happened. Lois was aware that her heart was racing, her breath was short, and her brain was beginning to glaze over. Not to mention that an aching longing to get naked with this man was gnawing at her. So it was not surprising that she barely recognized the sense of deja vu that was playing at the edge of her consciousness, aroused by her sense of smell. She forced her brain to confront it.

"Clark!" she gasped.

"What, baby?" Clark said huskily as his kisses moved down her chest.

"Clark Jerome Kent!" she said, this time with more force.

The man so named stood back and looked at her with a sheepish grin. "Lois, I knew this would work. I knew that if you didn't recognize me by sight, or by the sound of my voice, you'd have to know me if our hearts were racing together."

"I'm not sure whether to be relieved that the two men I want are the same man, or to be furious that you've put me through hell for hours thinking I was some kind of psycho woman for wanting two men. And, by the way, it was that masculine smell you give off that made me recognize you. So I guess, in a way, pheromones are responsible for this whole thing."

"Sweetheart, I may have put you through hours of torment, but you've put me through months of it, going crazy over Superman while dismissing me as a farmboy beneath your interest."

Lois shivered. She looked at the window, still open from Superman's entrance. Moving close to him, she pulled his cape around her.

"Well, super farmboy, I guess there's only one thing to do now." She ran her hand over his S. "Does this thing have a zipper or what?"

"We really should talk," Clark said.

Lois knew he'd only said it because he felt he should. So she did what she felt she should. "Finish what you started first, big guy," she said as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his head to meet hers. There would be plenty of time for talk. Years, in fact.