By Emily M. Hanson <email@example.com>
Submitted: April 2004
Summary: This badfic parody is the sequel to Wanda Sue.
Disclaimers: I don't own Lois & Clark. I believe the characters are still owned by DC comics.
Author's Notes: This is a badfic parody. Please note, all of the typos and grammar errors in Clark's story are on purpose, even the Lois one. ;)
Clark stared at the computer screen. For the first time in his career as a journalist, he was unsure of what to write. However, this particular story was different than most. He was writing it because of Lois's badly written (at least, in his opinion) Superman fan fiction. He'd accidentally discovered it on the Internet, read it, and reviewed it, not knowing she had written it. But Lois found out anyway, and as a way to make it up to her, he was going to write an even worse story and post it on the Internet.
Deliberately writing a bad story was an idea that he was having trouble with. Clark believed in always doing the best that he could. He'd been brought up to value integrity and hard work. If it weren't for Lois, he wouldn't be doing it at all. Of course, if it weren't for her, Superman wouldn't exist. Clark would still help people as much as he could, but he wouldn't have a secret identity to hide behind. He wondered if there was any way he could let her know. Then an idea popped into his head, and he began to type.
It was 9 am when Kent Stu arrived at work. He had a rather dull job as an acountant in a tax firm. However, Kent was happy because of one thing: his realtionship with Wanda Sue Detroit. Granted, she didn't know it was him, for she only recognized one aspect of his peronality — Superman. You see, Kent led a double life, and that meant a secret identity. He could never tell anyone his secret. They would try to kill him and the people he loved, especially Wanda. He refused to let that happen.
Kent sat down at his desk as his boss, Jim White, came out of his office. "Mr. Stu," he barked, "why are you late?"
Kent sighed. He'd just rescued a whole village from a flood in China that morning. It had been on the news. But he had to come up with a sutable excuse. "I, ah, had a dentist appointment, sir. I'm sorry. It won't happen again."
"Well, I hope it does, or you'll get cavities," said Mr. White.
"You know, when your teeth rot. Why, I remember the time Elvis had a cavity…" Mr. White trailed off, telling a story about his favorite rock star, who had not really died after all, but was currently the governor of California.
Kent does his best to look like he was paying attention, but his attention wanders to Lois, who is the love of his life. They were going to get married someday, he just knows it.
"Anyway, Mr. Stu, get back to work."
Kent sighed as his boss left. Sometimes, he wondered if he was ever going to be able to tell Wanda Sue his secret. She was beautiful. He knew he could trust her, but when was the right time?
After work, he met Wanda at her apartment, dressed as Superman. She was wearing a glittery red dress that made his eyes pop, though he tried to control the reaction, since Superman would never react like that. "Good evening, Wanda Sue."
She smiled. "Hello, Kal El. I've cooked a wonderful dinner."
He could smell it. She's fried shrimp, cooked rice and vegetables and put a nice wine on the table. Wanda had soft jazz playing in the background and the lights were turned down low.
"Clark, what are you doing?" Lois's voice cut into his thoughts.
He glanced up. "I'm working on that piece."
"You know. The piece."
Lois suddenly realized he meant the fan fiction. "Oh, that story?"
"Can I read it?"
"Not until it's finished."
"Okay. But hurry up."
Clark nodded and began to type some more after Lois left.
As Wanda Sue and Superman sat down to dinner, Kent had a burning desire to tell her the truth. "Wanda," he said, "what would you say if I told you I haven't been completly honest with you?"
She looked stunned. "Kal El, you're the most truthful person I've ever met. Whatever do you mean?"
"Well, there's something about me you don't know."
He nodded. "First you must promise never to tell anyone else."
"I promise," Wanda replied. Her soft brown eyes sparkle as she stared into his eyes.
"I have a secret identity. I'm not who you think I am."
"Yes. I work as an accountant during the day, Wanda. My real name is Kent Stu."
An accountnt? She gaped at him in shock. Her fork fell from her hand and nearly tipped her wine glass over. "You have a day job?"
He nodded. "You see, I've always wanted to have a life and fit in. That's all I've ever really wanted. And now that I have you, I can do that even more." He smiled disarming.
Wanda's expression turned to one of joy. "Oh, Kent! I am so much more in love with you now! Let's get married!!!"
He grinned as he rushed around the table at super speed and hugged her. "I would love to marry you, Wanda."
And they lived happily ever after.
Clark sighed. Yes, it was a truly terrible Marty Stu fic, but it would do. He glanced at Lois's desk. "I'm finished."
She looked up. "Okay. Just e-mail it to me, and I'll post it for you."
He nodded. Clark wondered if Lois would see through his story and discover the true message behind it.
She read quickly. When she was finished, she walked over to his desk. "Clark, this is truly the worst Marty Stu fic I've seen. Superman having a secret identity? Come on. How could he live such a double life and hold down a day job? He'd be late all the time. He'd probably get fired within the first month."
He tried not to look nervous. She didn't believe him. Well, maybe it was for the best. "It was just a hunch I've always had."
"Right. Well, I'll post the story."
"Lois, does this make us even?"
She smiled. "Yes, Clark. We're even."