Coming of Age
By Stopquitdont@bellsouth.net
Rated: PG-13
Submitted: July 2007

****
This story has been sitting half written on my hard drive for so
long, I forget now when I actually started it. Probably three or
four years ago now. I wrote bits and pieces, then went back and
added to it, changed things around, and rewrote until I finally
had something worth reading. At least I hope it's worth
reading.

I'm not exactly sure exactly who all I managed to wrangle into
beta'ing this for me. If I'm not mistaken, I think Sue S. was
the only brave soul. Thanks Sue... I'm still laughing at some of
the comments you made! If by chance there was someone else, I
apologize for not remembering you. Like I said, this one has
been around on my computer so long, I never thought it would see
the light of day.

I also apologize for not posting this to the boards first. I'm
the type of reader who prefers to read a story completely
finished, and I'm also way too busy to keep up a posting
schedule that wouldn't offend anyone. I do hope anyone who reads
this finds it enjoyable. As usual, look for something a little
different. I'm sure you're familiar with my writing by now.

No copyright infringements intended.

Comments very welcome. Good or bad.

****
A slight breeze played across the tops of the corn fields as a
silver van eased to a stop, preparing to dump twenty eager
teenagers in front of a large, rustic cabin. Lois Lane stepped
down from the vehicle that had transported her in from the
airport in Wichita. A wide smile spread across her face as she
drank in the new sights around her. She'd arrived at Camp Joy, a
summer camp designed for children with learning disabilities.
There were several sites all over the country and Lois had
applied to be a counselor at all of them, hoping for a spot at a
location in California. Unfortunately, she drew a tour of duty
in, of all places, Kansas... Smallville, Kansas. Lois Lane, big
city girl, had pulled duty in the country... on a farm... in the
middle of neverending wheat fields!

She'd make the best of it, she'd decided the day she'd received
her information packet. Being chosen as a counselor for Camp Joy
was considered an honor among high school students. The
positions were only offered to the top three percent of students
across the country. Eight weeks in the middle of Nowheresville
would be worth it when the editor of the Daily Planet decided to
appoint her to an intern position at the paper.

Lois focused on the head counselor as he began passing out cabin
assignments.

++

Adjusting to life in the country was a bit more difficult than
Lois had anticipated. She'd always believed herself a morning
person until she'd come to Kansas. How wrong she'd been! A full
day of work was done before dawn, then the structured activities
began. By the end of the first week, the vivacious girl from the
city had learned what being completely exhausted was all about.

Relaxed into a routine by the second week, Lois began to really
enjoy the whole camp experience. She'd never imagined that
helping those kids achieve small milestones would be so
rewarding. To listen as a child read his first complete
sentence, or see the smile when another learned to fly a kite by
himself was very inspiring for the young woman. And she'd
discovered that little people weren't quite as annoying as she'd
pegged them to be.

Another aspect of camp she enjoyed was meeting a lot of
wonderful people. One of those people was Karen Byers, one of
Lois' cabin mates. Karen was a fiery redhead from San Francisco.
She and Lois had a lot in common; they both wanted to have
careers in a man's world. Karen wanted to be a pilot in the Air
Force, while Lois had her sights set on being a top reporter for
the Daily Planet in Metropolis. There were a couple others Lois
liked, but Karen had become a quick friend.

++

"Come on, Lois. We're missing all the fun."

Lois turned to the redheaded girl. "I'm coming. I'm coming." She
tied her shoe, smoothed her hand through her hair, and followed
her friend out of the cabin door.

Lois also enjoyed going out with a group of the counselors and
meeting up with local kids for a little fun. They would all
gather at a place called the Blue Hole. The Blue Hole was a rock
quarry on the outskirts of town and it boasted some of the
cleanest, blue water because it was constantly fed by a spring-
perfect for swimming. In the case of the local teens, the
seclusion offered a great place just to 'hang out'.

And Lois enjoyed the Friday night parties because it made her
feel important to answer the hundred and one questions from a
bunch of kids who had never been off the farm. So, during most
of the duration of camp, those nights were highly anticipated.

"Don't look now, but I think you have an admirer," Karen told
Lois as they stood around with the others on another Friday
night.

"I know. He's been eying me all night."

"He *is* cute," Karen admitted after careful inspection.

"He's okay," Lois lied. Truth was the guy in question was
extremely cute. He was tall and well built for his age,
certainly no older than the rest of the teenagers there. He had
beautiful black hair and, even with glasses, he didn't hurt the
eyes.

"I'll bet you don't have enough nerve to go talk to him," Karen
challenged.

"Oh yeah?" Lois Lane was never one to back down from anyone or
anything, and she wasn't about to start now.

"Yeah. In fact, I'll wager next week's clean-up on it."

"You're on," Lois said as she extended her hand for them to
shake on it. Karen grinned widely as Lois stood up and
approached the poor, unsuspecting victim.

The guy stiffened as he saw Lois coming his way. She stopped a
foot or two in front of him and smiled.

"Hi. I'm Lois."

He smiled and reached for her outstretched hand. "Clark."

"Well, Clark, do you always oogle girls at parties?"

Clark's smile faded somewhat as his friends cheered their
pleasure at his discomfort. He withdrew his hand, his cheeks
rosey with embarrassment. "Sorry to disagree with you, *Lois*. I
don't feel I was oogling you. I do think you're a very pretty
girl and couldn't resist a peek or two. Excuse me for noticing."
He turned with a snort and walked away.

Lois felt ashamed of herself. It wasn't often boys paid her
compliments. Everyone knew her and how stubborn she was, and
though she'd never cared what anyone thought of her, this boy's
opinion suddenly meant everything. She ran after him.

She caught up with Clark as he shut the door of his truck. He
looked up at her when she gripped the metal. "Clark. Wait. I'm
sorry. Guess I'm not used to guys watching me."

Clark slowly smiled. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

"No, no. You didn't. In fact, I'm flattered. And if you think
about it, how would I know you were checking me out if I wasn't
checking *you* out?"

Clark blushed and looked down at his hands on the steering
wheel. "I guess that makes us even."

"Yeah. So won't you come back to the party? We could talk."

"Okay." Clark crawled from the truck and walked back to the
group with Lois.

++

"I hope to have several articles to submit when I finally apply
to a big paper," Clark told Lois as they sat on the back of his
truck. They'd talked at the party for a while before he offered
to show her his hometown. He didn't know why he'd been so bold,
but he was loving every minute of their time together. From the
moment he'd noticed the girl after she'd joined the party, it
was all he could do to keep his eyes off her. Lois was, without
a doubt, the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. She was also
easy to talk to, unlike the girls he'd grown up with. He felt
relaxed with her in a way he never had with anyone, and it
wasn't long before he was pouring out some of his deepest
thoughts and desires to her.

They talked on into the night, content to stay where they were.
Clark told her about his parents, his friends, football, and
some of the places he'd been traveling to since graduation. Lois
told him about big city life, her kid sister, and her annoyingly
old-fashioned parents. Neither wanted to part company, but the
approaching dawn finally pulled them apart. Clark drove Lois
back to the camp and they quickly made plans to see one another
the following weekend.

And for the next three weeks, Friday nights found the couple
engaged in conversation for hours. They would meet one another
at the Blue Hole, sometimes participating with the group for a
while before they'd venture away to be alone. There seemed to be
an unspoken agreement to be just friends and nothing else, both
knowing that the summer was drawing to an end and they would
soon go their separate ways. Keeping things platonic made the
most sense and rewarded them both with an invaluable
friendship.

++

Lois and Clark had grabbed a burger at the Dairy Freeze, then
headed off to the drive-in for a movie. They'd walked the track
at the park at least ten times, talking endlessly. Clark had
told Lois that he planned to leave the following Monday on one
last trip before heading off to college, so neither was anxious
to part company. It was Lois that asked to see his house, and
not wanting to deny her anything, Clark pointed the truck in the
direction of his folks' farm.

They parked behind the barn and crept around in the darkness so
they wouldn't wake Clark's parents. On a challenge, Lois and
Clark ended up sitting on a hay bale in the loft.

I'll bet you bring all the girls here," Lois told Clark.

"Just the special ones." He was smiling at her in the darkness.

"How many?"

"Oh, a few." The conversation had somehow turned dangerous,
something they hadn't allowed it to do since they'd been seeing
one another.

"And tell me... do you kiss 'em?" she asked as she leaned toward
him, intentionally goading him.

"Maybe," he asnwered with a grin.

Lois' challenging smile faded. Clark was so gorgeous sitting
there in the moonlight shining through the loft door. She knew
she shouldn't, but she lifted a hand to touch his face. It was
all she'd been able to do not to touch him the last few weeks.
Just one touch couldn't hurt.

Clark's smile faded and his hand came up to her face. Obviously
he had no problems with this turn in their relationship. "What
would you say if I told you I'd like to kiss you?"

She answered by leaning forward and pressing her lips to his.
Kissing boys wasn't something she'd done often, but resisting
this one was impossible. Their teenage enthusiasm and curiosity
took over quickly. Lois straddled his lap, buried her hands in
his hair, and attacked his mouth. Clark's hands were roaming her
back, and he grunted when she anxiously kissed him. She wasn't
exactly sure what had come over her. Never had she dreamed of
being so bold with a boy before. Yet, she couldn't stop herself.
And knowing this was probably the last night she'd ever see
Clark seemed to fuel her actions.

Clark grasped her sides and withdrew from the kiss. "Lois, we
shouldn't do this."

"I know, but..." She simply looked at him for a long moment
before leaning back in to kiss him again. When things became
intense once more, Clark put a halt to the action.

"Lois," he breathed, gasping to catch his breath.

"Don't tell me you're gay or something," Lois stated, in defense
of her wounded pride. She was so sure he liked her; there was no
mistaking those heated looks he'd given her. And though she
wasn't very experienced when it came to boys, being pushed away
when you were throwing yourself at someone was hard to take.

"No!"

"What? Waiting for marriage? Clark, everybody does it."

What? Where had that thought come from? Was she really
considering doing more than just kissing with Clark?

"I know. And I'm not waiting for marriage, but we need to be
careful. You know... protection."

"Got it covered." She scrambled off his lap and dug around in
her backpack until she found a condom. Clark's brows raised when
she held it out to him. "Took it from my dad's stash. Wanted to
look cool. Sometimes at camp the kids like to see what everybody
else has in their bags. I didn't want to be dubbed the
'virgin'."

"Are you?" Clark asked seriously.

Lois lowered her head in embarrassment. "What if I am?"

Clark crooked his finger under her chin and raised her head.
"It's nothing to be ashamed of. Too many kids think you *have*
to have sex to be cool."

"Are you?"

"Yeah."

Her heart thundered in her chest from the newfound burst of
boldness. She'd always been focused on her future, not giving
much thought to relationships. Truth be told, she had never been
that interested in boys.

Not until this one. There was just something about Clark that
Lois found irresistible. Maybe a part of her knew after tonight
they'd never see each other again and that would make Clark
safe. He could never hurt her the way she'd seen her friends get
hurt. Their boyfriends always bragged about sex. Lois would die
if some boy did that to her. Clark couldn't do that, at least
where she could feel the effects. Besides, she didn't think it
was in his nature.

She slowly straddled his lap again. "I want us to learn
together, Clark," she whispered and realized that was exactly
what she wanted.

+

Clark gripped her waist, swiftly losing the battle with his
mind. Truth was his eighteen year old body was raging with
hormones and when she moved, he reacted instantly.

"Please, Clark."

He whimpered when she kissed him.

Clark was having a similar battle within his mind as Lois was.
Unlike Lois though, he'd often thought about situations just
like this. Knowing he was unique from any other boy alive had
prompted him to make a silent promise not to be careless with
his sexuality. But Lois' kisses were amazing. Maybe he could
just go part way. His hands roamed, causing both to moan at the
contact.

Soon that wasn't enough for Lois. She pulled back from the kiss
and jerked her shirt off. She reached up behind her back and
flipped the clasp on her bra, pulling the lace from her body.

Clark's eyes widened as she bared herself to his hungry gaze. He
may have reasoned it would be okay to go part way and no
further, but the sight of her partially naked body, there, in
his lap, was too much for him to handle. "Lois, you are
amazing."

Lois pushed him away from her and started pulling at his shirt.
He quickly snatched it off and lost himself in another kiss.

Lois was the impatient one, rising to her feet to finish
undressing. Clark couldn't move. He hadn't intended to go *this*
far. He didn't know how to stop it now though as he watched Lois
settle on the quilt that was spread out on the loft floor. She
reached for him and he came willingly. Their mouths bathed each
other in wet, hungry kisses as their hands wondered and explored
unknown curves.

Lois pulled Clark's glasses from his face so she could see his
beautiful eyes.

Clark was breathing almost as hard as Lois. He had to break the
kiss to catch his breath. He was about to say something else,
but Lois swallowed his protests in another kiss.

That was too much. A moment later he lay with her, void of his
clothes.

Lois reached for him. His heart pounded loudly as he stared down
at her. "Are you sure?" he asked softly.

"I'm sure."

Clark went to her then, trembling as he initiated another kiss.
A stray thought caused him to jerk from her.

"Condom!"

Lois' confusion cleared as Clark scrambled to retrieve the foil
package. Thank God he'd paid attention in sex-ed, he thought
absently, then he was with her again.

It was a little while later when he asked, "You okay?"

Lois smiled over at him. "Very okay. That was great."

"Quick," Clark mumbled.

"What did you expect?"

"I don't know."

She leaned over and kissed him lightly. "It was... super."

+

And Lois realized that she *had* enjoyed it. She'd recalled a
bunch of 'first time' stories her friends had told her, none too
promising. However, with Clark she'd relaxed and enjoyed his
touches, his kisses. He was right; it had been quick. It had
also felt wonderful. Suddenly she couldn't figure out why she'd
waited so long. But her conscience quickly reminded her that she
was still so very young. She'd waited for the right guy and the
right time. Here, in a hayloft on a Kansas farm, she realized
she'd found both.

He smiled and kissed her again, then drew back. "Guess we should
get up."

"Yeah."

He kissed her once more before rolling away to get dressed. A
few minutes later he was exiting the still usable outhouse
behind the barn.

Lois was fully dressed and waiting on him when he came out.

"I can't believe you have an outhouse." She stared at the item,
still unable to believe what her sight was telling her.

Clark chuckled softly. "I think Dad has an emotional attachment.
We do have indoor plumbing."

"That's good." They stood in awkward silence, neither knowing
what to say. Finally Lois spoke. "I, ah, I need to get back."

"Yeah. My folks will be up soon, too. Come on. I'll drive you."

She nodded and let him lead her to the truck. He held the door
while she climbed in. Ten minutes later, he stopped outside the
gate of the camp.

"Clark, tonight was very special to me. It always will be."

+

Here it was. The let down. But what had he expected? They were
kids with their whole lives ahead of them.

He lifted his hand to her face and smiled. "It was special to
me, too. *You* are special to me."

Lois grinned and leaned in for a long, lingering kiss. She
hugged him, then scrambled from the truck. Clark watched her
disappear into the darkness. For a long while he simply sat in
the truck, looking in the direction Lois had disappeared. He
couldn't figure out just what had made him forget all of his
promises to himself. From the time he'd been mature enough to
make his own decisions, choosing not to have sex had been at the
top of his list. He didn't want to be like some of his buddies:
have sex with a girl, then forget she existed. Lately, he'd told
himself that he wanted to wait for the right girl. Of course,
he'd known he'd meet a lot of interesting and beautiful women in
his life. He hadn't made a vow of celibacy or anything, but he'd
certainly never thought his first time would be in the loft of
his parents' barn either.

Lois Lane had changed his life in only a matter of weeks. She
was unlike anyone he'd ever met. Intelligent, funny,
beautiful... Clark felt as if he'd known her his whole life. She
had also changed his life completely. *Tonight* changed my life,
he thought. Tonight had been a night full of firsts: His first
love, his first 'time', and his first broken heart.

++

Clark's induction into manhood was over but never far from his
mind. He thought about Lois at least once every fifteen minutes.
He was glad he was traveling because his thoughts often reminded
him physically of what he'd shared with a special girl. He had
to get a grip on his hormones before classes started in a few
weeks. Luckily his newfound ability to fly provided him with a
distraction.

And her night with Clark affected Lois more than she cared to
admit. He was constantly on her mind. She called his house the
following weekend only to find out he'd left again, just as he'd
told her he would. So she put on a brave face and got on with
her life.

Camp ended a week later, with no one the wiser to Lois' plight.
She left Smallville and her memories of Clark Kent behind. She'd
start Metropolis High in two weeks as a senior and was going to
be swamped. She'd save her dreams for an occasional escape from
the madness.

++

"Lois, what's wrong?" Tammie asked her friend as Lois came out
of the bathroom stall. "You've thrown up three times this
morning."

"I don't know." Lois splashed cold water on her face. "I can't
be sick now. I've got too much going on."

"Maybe you should go home and rest."

"Can't. Got a staff meeting with the paper last hour."

"Okay, but you can't say I didn't warn you." Tammie checked her
make-up in the mirror. "C'mon. Coach Taylor will spaz if we're
late. She's teaching the finer points of femininity today."

"Sex-ed in health already?"

"'Fraid so."

Lois sighed and followed her friend to class.

++

Lois couldn't catch her breath as she listened to Coach Taylor
express the importance of birth control during sex. She leaned
over to Jack, the class clown.

"Ask her if it's possible to get pregnant from minimal
contact."

"Sure. Coach, can you knock a girl up if ya' just take a quick
peek?" Jack smiled, happy to cause a few laughs, as always.

"Jack, pregnancy is possible any time your body makes contact
with hers intimately without protection. There is semen present
from the moment a man becomes aroused... and long after the deed
is done," the teacher explained.

"So, there's a chance of pregnancy with a touch?" He just
couldn't help himself. Now that the question had been asked,
maybe it wouldn't hurt to find out all the important details.
One never knew when it would come in handy.

"I'm afraid so, Jack. And contrary to popular belief, you *can*
impregnate a girl the first time. Hers or yours."

The rest of the class went black to Lois. She was in shock. She
may be pregnant. How could she have been so stupid? Sweat beaded
on her forehead and she nearly passed out. A few moments later
she jumped to her feet and ran for the bathroom.

The coach looked to Tammie for answers. "She's been sick all
day," the girl said with a shrug. The coach nodded and continued
her class.

++

Two days and a trip to the clinic later, Lois' suspicions were
confirmed. She was seven weeks pregnant. Suddenly the most
wonderful night of her life became her worst nightmare. She had
no idea what to do.

Lois went through the next week in a daze. How did she deal with
this? She was only sixteen, a full month away from her birthday.
Her parents would go ballistic. All her dreams would be crushed.
Not to mention what all of her friends would think.

And she didn't even want to think about Clark. What would he
think? She'd wanted to have sex more than he had. His parents
would be so disappointed in him. In the short time they'd gotten
to know one another, she knew he'd want to do the 'right' thing.
He'd do whatever was necessary to ensure the baby was taken care
of, gladly giving up all his plans and dreams to unselfishly
care for another. How could she do that to him? Yet, how could
she keep something like this from him?

Confused and scared, she lowered her head in her hands and
cried.

++

Lois was so ashamed of herself for being careless. She could
only imagine how her parents would react. So, with help from
Tammie, she made an appointment at a clinic in mid-town to have
an abortion. She felt it was the only thing she could do. Both
she and Clark were so young, with so much ahead of them. A baby
would ruin all of that. She gathered her courage and headed
downtown to the Women's Clinic.

But the trip proved fruitless. The literature was much too
graphic. Lois' conscience would not allow her to do such a
thing. She bolted from the building only to end up back where
she'd started.

As one week rolled into two, Lois realized she had to do
something. Her parents were asking questions about her strange
behavior, so she decided this was something she couldn't hide
forever.

She looked up from the dinner at her silently eating parents,
thankful Lucy was at a friend's.

"Mom, Dad, I have something to tell you."

The older Lanes looked up at the deadpan expression on their
daughter's face. Both waited patiently for her to continue.

Lois closed her eyes, took a deep breath, then said, "I'm
pregnant."

They just stared at her for several long moments in shock. Her
mother put down her fork, wiped her mouth, and practically
yelled, "WHAT?!"

"I'm pregnant."

"By who?" her mother demanded.

"Does it matter?" Lois knew if she told her parents who the boy
was, they'd probably attempt to have him arrested.

"Yes. He's responsible for this," Ellen told her.

"Damn right he is," Sam agreed. "Lois, you're a minor. If he's
not, he's committed a crime."

"No. His only crime was listening to me. *I* wanted it to
happen. *I* asked him."

"Lois, my God, this is a disgrace." Ellen couldn't believe her
daughter had done something so degrading. The girl had always
been a little over the top, but this... this was outrageous!

"Why mother? You're not the one pregnant." Despite how she felt,
the young girl gave as good as she got.

"No, but my sixteen year old daughter is. How do you think that
makes me look?"

"Like your daughter has a mind of her own."

"Don't talk to your mother like that," her dad told her.
"Now..." He took a breath. "Are you sure about this?"

"Nine weeks sure."

"It was that damn camp. I knew you shouldn't have gone." Ellen
stood and stomped to the end of the table. She was in full rant
mode, yelling for twenty minutes. The whole time Sam had
remained silent. Finally, he cleared his throat.

"This is what is going to happen. You will tell us who the boy
is. We will go to see him and his parents."

"I won't tell you if you're planning to have him arrested. I
won't!" She jumped up and ran from the room.

That night she listened to her parents yell about her. She had
never been such a disappointment to her folks. That made her
feel even more ashamed. The next morning Sam and Ellen woke
her.

Sam sat on her bed. "Lois, we have made a few decisions."

"Don't I get a say in the matter?" Lois asked her father.

"I think you've said and done enough," Ellen replied
sarcastically.

Sam looked up at his wife. "Ellen." When she was silent, he
turned back to Lois. "You and this boy have only two choices.
Since we don't believe in abortion, you will either put this
baby up for adoption..."

"Or?"

"You and the boy will get married and take responsibility for
what you've done."

"What?!"

"It's the right thing to do. We prefer the first option, but
since we can't force you to sign the papers..." Sam allowed his
sentence to trial off.

"And what about marriage? You'll force me to do that?" Lois was
furious. True, she didn't want to abort her baby and she hadn't
even thought about adoption, but that option didn't seem like
something she would like either.

"You did this, little girl," her mother told her.

"Ellen, please." Sam's frustration with Ellen was evident.
They'd argued most of the night about what to do. His wife had
declared abortion was the only option, despite the fact they'd
never been a couple to support such a thing. This was her
daughter, and Ellen felt Lois' future would be wasted if she was
strapped to a baby.

Sam faced Lois once more. "We're not forcing you. We gave you
options."

"Why do I have to marry him?" Lois asked. She'd had a great few
nights with Clark. In another time, another place, Clark could
have easily been someone she would consider having a
relationship with. But marriage... at sixteen? What about her
career? What about her plans?

<And just how do you plan to do any of those things with a
baby?> Her conscience was very quick to remind her.

She forced herself to listen when her father spoke again.

"Because if you want to keep this baby, somebody has to take
care of it. We're not going to. Besides, you don't want your
child born a bastard," Sam pointed out.

"You are so old fashioned." Lois folded her arms across her
chest in a huff.

"That may be, but the fact remains, we can make this hard for
you," Sam threatened.

"Just give it up for adoption," Ellen told her.

Lois glanced at her father, his eyes held a deep concern for
her. Ellen had told Sam his position in the medical world was
far too important to throw away on the compulsive actions of his
teenage daughter. He'd argued that the final decision was really
out of his and his wife's hands. But Ellen, being the narrow
minded, egotistical person she was, argued that such a scandal
could ruin them. The woman enjoyed their station in life. Being
the wife of a successful doctor afforded her many luxuries. Her
friends would surely turn against her if they allowed Lois to
have a child out of wedlock. Further, it was just disgraceful.

Lois didn't miss the underlying worry in her father's eyes, but
wasn't about to stand down on this one. "I think the father has
a say in that."

"I think the father has done enough," Ellen ground out.

"Ellen, please!" Again Sam was trying to quiet his wife down.

Lois couldn't think straight; she couldn't breathe. Maybe she
should have kept this from her parents as long as she could.

<Then what? They'd have made you give it up then for sure.>

Was that what she wanted? Marrying Clark certainly wasn't.
Besides, who was to say he'd agree to such a thing anyway.

"Lois," her father cut through her musing. "Think about this
carefully," he told her.

She stared over at him for a moment before something he'd said
came back to her. "What did you mean, you could make this hard
on me?"

"He meant that we'd disown you!" Ellen's voice had raised in
frustration. Lois was a sensible girl. So why was she making
this so difficult?!

Lois could only stare at her mother. Did she mean what she'd
just said? Slowly Lois faced her father again. "Daddy?"

Sam sighed heavily and glanced down at his hands before meeting
his daughter's gaze. "Lois, you have to understand my position
here. How would it look if I allowed my unwed daughter to have a
child and raise it under our roof?"

"Is that what this is about? Your image?!" Lois was angry. Her
parents cared more about how they looked to the neighbors than
they did about the future of their child!

"It's not that..." Sam tried to explain.

"I'm sorry if I embarrass you..." Lois was so angry she had
started to shake.

"Yes!" Sam shouted as he shot to his feet. "You have embarrassed
us! You're sixteen, Lois. Sixteen! You're not even finished with
high school. What will you do now? And without our help?"

"A baby is a lot of work," Ellen added. She should know. Lois
came along before she'd planned to have children. Thank goodness
she and Sam had already wed.

"You can't do it alone," her father continued. "Do the right
thing. Give the baby up. Even marrying the father isn't a much
better option."

"Certainly not," Ellen agreed. "What kind of life could a
teenage boy possibly provide you with." This time she folded her
arms.

"You can't expect me to just give up this baby without talking
to the father first." It was lame, she knew, but it was the only
thing Lois could think to say. And she really did want to talk
to Clark. If she was going to give this baby up for adoption, he
would have to be told.

Sam sighed again. "You have two days."

Her parents turned and left her alone. What now? Could she have
this baby and give it away to strangers? Could she do that to
Clark?

He'd told her that he was adopted and how he'd always longed to
have a connection to himself. He adored his parents, but not
knowing anything about yourself had to be devastating. How could
she do that to him?

The last thing she wanted to do was marry him though. They
didn't know each other. What would they do if they married? Yet,
to have this baby she had to marry him. Then again, maybe she
could just give it to Clark. After all, she really didn't want
to be anyone's mother.

++

"Mom, he didn't say what this was about?" Clark asked his mother
of their intended visitors.

"Just that you had to be here." Martha set the tray with coffee
on it on the table in the den. Sam Lane had called three days
before and said he and his wife, Ellen, were coming to talk to
them. He told them to have Clark there. And now it was about
time for their arrival.

"They're here," Clark said as his hearing picked up the hum of
the engine of their car. A few minutes later, his father opened
the door to the couple. Clark stood across the room as they
entered. He was more than a little disappointed that the older
couple was alone. He'd hoped Lois would have come with them.

Jonathan had introduced himself and Martha. He held out an arm
to Clark. "And this is my son..."

"Clark," Sam interrupted. He made no attempt to shake the boy's
offered hand. "I'll get right to the point." Sam squared his
shoulders and began. "We have a daughter."

"Lois?" Martha asked.

"You've met her?"

"No. Clark told us about her."

Sam cut his eyes at Clark again. "Did he? Did he also tell you
that he and Lois have a... past, if you can call it that?"

Clark shifted from one foot to the other as he and his parents
listened in rapt attention to Sam Lane. Somehow the man had
found out about the night in the barn. His heart rate increased
as Sam continued.

"At the risk of sounding indelicate, these *children* decided to
engage in some very adult activities."

Martha and Jonathan turned to stare at Clark. He closed his eyes
and took a deep breath.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kent, your son has impregnated our daughter."

This time Clark's eyes were as wide as his parents'. "What?!"

"Lois is almost ten weeks pregnant with... *Clark's* child." Sam
glared over at the young man.

Clark struggled to breathe. How had this happened? They had used
protection. <Oh God!> He bent and put his hands on his knees.
He'd touched her briefly *before* he used the condom. <Stupid!
Stupid! Stupid!>

His parents were stunned. By Clark's reaction, the news was
possibly true.

"No need to pray about it now," Ellen clipped out.

Sam gave her a warning glare and watched as Clark stood back up.
"What do you have to say for yourself? Did you not realize Lois
was a minor?"

"Clark Kent! What the hell were you thinking?"

Clark met his father's angry gaze. He'd never seen such
disappointment and shame there. His mom was on the verge of
tears. All the hopes and dreams their son had talked of for
years were destroyed in a single moment of stupidity.

Clark stood straighter, fully prepared to take responsibility
for what he'd done. "Mr. Lane, I take full responsibility for
what I've done."

"You bet you will." Sam pulled some papers from his jacket. "We
gave Lois two choices. We give you the same." He held out the
papers to Clark.

"What are they?" Martha finally found her voice.

Clark's terrified eyes met his mother's after he'd read over the
documents before him. "They want my permission to allow the baby
to be adopted."

"What?" Martha grabbed the papers.

"This is the smart thing to do," Sam told them. "We don't
believe in abortion."

"Thank, God," Martha mumbled as she continued to read.

"Is this what Lois wants? Where is she? I should really be
talking this over with her."

"Lois is a child. She doesn't know what's best for her. We do."
Ellen glared at the three people in front of her.

"Ellen!" Ellen threw her hands up at Sam's tone. "What Lois
wants is irrelevant. You should have thought about the
consequences of your actions before you forced yourself on my
daugher."

"I did not *force* myself. Yeah, I should have had more control.
I should have known better, but arguing about it now won't
help."

Sam was taken aback by Clark's tone. "That's right, it won't.
But as you've said, it's time to take responsibility. Sign those
papers so we can put this behind us."

"Put it behind us? You want me to just forget this? Forget that
somewhere in the world there would be child that carries my
genes? How do I do that?"

Martha put a hand on Clark's arm. "Mr. Lane, this is a touchy
subject for Clark. He's adopted."

"I'm well aware of that. Lois has told us. That's why we've
agreed to her request. She wants Clark to have the baby."

"What?" Clark was stunned. How could she want such a thing? More
to the point, how could he do that to her?

"We gave Lois two choices. One was adoption."

"And the other?" asked Jonathan Kent. He'd folded the adoption
request and was staring pointedly at Sam Lane. He'd made the
decision he didn't like the man.

"For them to do the right thing. That's the only way we'd allow
her to keep this child. No grandchild of mine will born a
bastard."

"Is that what you want, Mr. Lane? For me to marry your
daughter?"

"None of this is what I want. My daughter is a high school
senior. She's going to be a doctor someday. She can't possibly
do that strapped to a marriage or a baby."

"But she's expected to do that grieving for a child she'll never
know?"

"She wants this! It was her choice not to marry. She wouldn't
agree to any kind of adoption unless it was to you. So..." He
pulled another set of papers out of his jacket. "That's a
paternity acknowledgement. It says you admit you're the father
and agree to custody once the child's born."

Clark read over the papers before looking back up at Sam. "This
will still make your grandchild a bastard," he said softly.

"No. This will make *your* parents' grandchild a bastard. Once
you sign those papers, the child is yours."

"And Lois?" Martha spoke up. "Where's Lois? Shouldn't the boy
have the opportunity to hear from her own mouth that this is
what she wants?"

"Lois has been sent to a school in up-state New Troy. She will
remain there until the birth. When the time comes, we will call
and you can come take the child away."

Clark was furious as well as hurt. "How can you speak of this as
just an inconvenience? You're taking away a piece of her. I find
it hard to believe she really wants this."

"Okay, Mr. Smarty. What if she keeps the baby? What will you do?
Stay here in Kansas with Mommy and Daddy while she struggles to
take care of it?"

"I'll say this one more time. Lois did not do this alone. This
is my child, too. I am fully prepared to care for it." Clark's
stance was one of power as he faced down his 'opponent'. If Sam
Lane wanted to battle, he'd give as good as he got.

"How? Flipping burgers at the drive-in won't cut it." Sam was
just as stubborn as Clark and refused to let a mere boy
intimidate him.

"I know that!" Clark shot right back.

"And Lois? Will you take care of her? She's still a baby
herself." This time it was Ellen Lane who asked the questions.

"She's my baby's mother. Of course I will take care of her."
That was a given. Lois would be very well taken care of.

"You should have done that to start with!" Sam had lost his
patience. He was furious and glared at Clark. "What kind of
values have your parents taught you? You take advantage of an
innocent girl just to get your kicks."

Clark saw red. He stepped forward and was about to grab Sam when
Jonathan stepped between the two. Jonathan struggled to hold
Clark back. "My son may be a lot of things: irrational,
compulsive, young, but he's not a rapist, as you suggest." He
held up his hand to forestall Sam's outburst. "I am aware of the
laws that say he can be arrested for this. However, if this
boy's guilty of anything it's giving into raging hormones. I am
positive that if Lois had indicated in the least that she wanted
to stop, he would have."

"Absolutely," Clark agreed right away.

"Now," Jonathan went on. "It happened and the most important
thing is this baby. Why don't we all sit, have some coffee, and
talk about this rationally?" There was an intense stand-off
before the Lanes moved.

When they had all settled, Jonathan spoke again. "I couldn't
possibly call myself a good father if I didn't ask to see proof
of what you say to be true."

Sam nodded and pulled still more papers from his pocket. "This
is the results of the pregnancy test, the initial exam, etc."

Clark read over his father's shoulder. The older man looked up
at him. "She's roughly ten weeks along. Does that fall into a
possible time frame that could make you the father?"

"Yes," Clark told him flatly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, Dad. Until..." He looked up at Sam, then back to his
father. "Lois and I..."

"Come on, boy. No sense in being modest now," Sam threw out.
"Mr. Kent, Lois told us she was a virgin that night. Yet another
thing your son took from her."

Clark had to grind his teeth to keep from opening his mouth.

Jonathan met Sam's gaze again. "And could there have been anyone
after Clark?"

"Our daughter's not a..."

"I never said she was, Mrs. Lane. I just want my bases
covered."

"Read further into the doctor's report. He thinks it's highly
unlikely that she's had sex more than the one time."

"Dad, Lois wouldn't have said the baby's mine if it wasn't,"
Clark told his father with sad eyes.

Jonathan read back over the doctor's report for a few moments
before he spoke. "Clark, what do you want to do?"

"I *want* to talk to Lois."

"Not possible," Sam told him immediately.

Clark was about to protest, but from the look on Sam's face, it
was no use. He thought about what this meant, what it could
mean. He thought about Lois giving up her child. He also felt a
rush of emotions that she'd bargained with her parents to give
the child to him.

"I truly don't see how you could just give away your
grandchild," Martha said softly. "Or ask your daughter to give
away her child. Don't you realize how badly this will scar
her?"

"Fine. Do you want to hear it from her lips?" Sam got up and
made his way to the phone. He dialed several numbers, spoke to
someone on the other end, and waited patiently for his daughter
to answer.

"Daddy? Is something wrong?"

"Lois, these people want to hear you tell them your decision.
I'll let you talk to Mr. Kent." Sam thrust the phone out to the
other man.

"Ah, Lois? This is Jonathan Kent."

"Mr. Kent," she said flatly.

"Lois, is this true? Is this Clark's baby?"

"Yes, sir," she answered softly. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't be. What's done is done? Now, won't you tell me what
you'd like? Do *you* want to give away your baby?"

"Clark doesn't want it?"

"Clark doesn't want to take it away from its mother. Lois, you
don't have to do this."

"Yes... I do. They won't let me keep it unless I marry Clark. I
don't think either of us is ready for that."

"I may agree there, but dear, if you want to keep your baby..."

"No, Mr. Kent..." She grew silent and Jonathan could hear her
struggle with her emotions. "It's the only way," she finally
whispered. "Tell Clark I'm so sorry," she sobbed before she hung
up.

Jonathan lowered the receiver and looked up at his son. From the
look on his face, Clark had heard the conversation as well. The
older man shook his head in silence before he hung up the
phone.

Clark pushed around his father and snatched up the paternity
papers that were now lying on the coffee table. He stepped over
to his mother's desk and found a pen before he quickly signed
the papers. He stopped in front of Sam Lane with very angry,
very pain filled eyes.

"I signed the damn papers. All I ask is that I get a monthly
report on her condition. I want to know she's okay. And if she
ever feels she wants to change her mind, I won't keep her child
from her. I also want to know immediately when she goes into
labor. I want to be there for her."

"Don't you think you've been there for her enough?"

"Mr. Lane, if I could talk to Lois, I'm positive I could get her
to change her mind. Is that what you want? Me married to her?
Because I would do it just to spite you."

"Why you little..." Sam shot to his feet.

"Enough!" Martha yelled. "I think Clark's requests are more than
fair. With his signature on that piece of paper, he is entitled
to know the progress of his child." She reached across to take
the papers from Sam's hand. "I'll make copies for Clark's
records." She turned and left the room.

Ellen was the one to finally speak. "We can arrange monthly
updates, and I will inform the staff myself to contact you when
the time comes." She stood and looked at Clark. "You will see
one day that this is for the best."

"Mrs. Lane, regardless of the fact that I will get this baby, he
or she will still be your grandchild. How could you turn your
back on that?"

Clark could tell he'd hit a nerve, but the woman remained
silent. She simply nodded and exited the house.

Martha returned a few moments later to hand Sam the paternity
papers.

"I still feel adoption would have been bes..." Sam said as he
stuffed the papers back into an inside pocket of his jacket.

"And I feel letting your daughter decide what she really wants
would have been rational." Clark couldn't help the retort that
slid from his lips.

Sam and Clark stared each other down for a few tense seconds
before Sam left.

When the house was quiet, Jonathan turned to his son. "This is,
ah, this is a shock."

Clark hung his head in shame.

"Damn, boy! What were you thinking? I know your hormones are
raging and that sex is common. Hell, I even had sex at your age.
But I was smart about it." Jonathan could only stare at his son
after his unusually loud outburst.

"Jonathan!"

"No, Martha! We've taught him better!"

"I know you did," Clark told him quietly.

"Then why? Why didn't you take precautions?"

"We did... just not soon enough. Dad, I swear... this is...
well, it's just as shocking to me." And it was. Clark couldn't
comprehend everything he'd learned earlier. He was only eighteen
years old, with his entire life stretched out before him. The
last thing he needed was to be someone's father.

"Son, you have to use protection *before* ejaculation," Jonathan
explained. Obviously all those talks he'd had with his boy
hadn't been enough.

"I did. Just in the heat of the moment, I... God..." Clark
shoved a hand through his hair. "I only touched her, Dad. What
are the chances of a girl getting pregnant that way?"

"In your case, pretty damn good!" The older man couldn't help
himself. He was upset and incredibly ashamed of his son.

Clark stared at his father. He could see the pain in the man's
eyes. It was something he'd never seen there or at least
something he'd never put there. "I'm so sorry," he whispered.

"Yeah, well, this is not going to be easy. Your life will change
dramatically."

"I have to agree with your father on that one. As much as we
love you and have always supported you, this is your
responsibility. We will help you all we can, but *you* will
raise this baby. Not us." Martha's heart and mind was having a
duel internally, but she knew the road that lay ahead. Her son
had made his bed and the only way for him to grow up was to lie
in it.

"Yes, ma'am." Clark's gaze dropped to the floor as his mind
rushed ahead to all the work to come.

Jonathan scratched his chin as he started for the kitchen.
"You'll have to go back to work. And that fancy scholarship will
have to be traded in for one at community college."

"I want to keep going to school. It's only sensible to further
my education to provide for my child." That much the young man
knew to be true. There was no way he could afford to give his
child what he or she would need if he didn't do that.

"And you'll have to use your savings to buy what the baby
needs," Jonathan went on.

"Yes, sir."

Jonathan studied his son's expression for a moment before he
turned and left.

Clark could only hang his head. He felt horrible he'd caused his
folks so much grief. How would they ever trust him again? He
fought back tears when his mother touched his arm. No words were
said. None had to be. Clark could see her pain as well.

Martha smiled sadly and left Clark to his thoughts.

He eased to the sofa and held his head in his hands. In a moment
of boyhood exuberance he'd not only lost his virginity, he'd
become a father. Now he had to learn how to be what his child
would need.

"Oh, Lois," he sighed softly at further thought of having to
take this child from her. The question of whether he'd take his
own child was one that never had to be asked. Of course he
would! At the same time he was in so much pain knowing he'd be
taking *Lois'* baby at the same time. How would they ever
survive?

@@@@@@

"Lois! My office. Now!"

"Ah, oh. Looks like you're in the doghouse."

Lois smiled up at her young colleague. The boss barking at you
was just an everyday thing around the newsroom. "Probably wants
some puff piece wrote up." Lois shrugged her shoulders and went
to see what it was she'd done now.

She pushed open the door to find her editor gazing down at some
files on his desk. "You wanted to see me, Chief?"

"Yeah. I have an assignment for you. Come on in." When Lois
stood at his desk, Perry looked up at her. "I have a friend in
the mid-west. He says there's some government agency doing some
digging on small farms all over the place. Says they're looking
for pesticide poisoning in the ground water. My friend thinks
it's something else altogether."

"Like?"

"Well, that's what you're going to find out. Here."

Lois took the offered file and read. Her eyes flew wide open
just before she closed the file. "I can't take this one."

"And just why not?" The editor wasn't accustomed to his
reporters telling him what assignments they would or wouldn't
take.

"It's personal." She placed the folder on his desk, hoping he'd
drop the subject.

Of course this was Perry White. He hadn't become editor-in-chief
because he could yodel. "I see. Here I thought you were a
professional."

"I am a professional."

"Then what's the problem?"

Lois opened her mouth, then shut it again. Carefully she
regained her emotions before speaking. "Perry, I cannot go to
Smallville. Can't you just trust me on this one?"

"Lois, this story reeks of government conspiracy. Something big
is happening and I want to know what. I have to put my best
reporter on this one."

"But Perry-"

"But Perry nothing. It's this or the dog show."

Lois mentally debated with herself for several minutes. Finally
she took a deep breath. "Okay. I'll go, but I don't have to like
it."

"Just get the story. All your travel arrangements have been
made. Look in the folder." He pointed his finger at the file.
"Now get out of here. You've got to pack."

Lois took up the offending object again, then trudged through
the door. This was the last thing she had expected today... or
ever. She didn't know how she was going to handle this. She
summoned all of her inner resolve. "Come on, Lane. You're a pro.
Get it together," she argued with herself. It was this or
reporting on Fido's shiny coat, and she'd worked far too hard to
become the best investigative reporter in the city to sit
through the judging of pampered pets. She'd handled tougher
assignments than this one. Besides, she would go in, get the
story, and get out before she could even think of all the
reasons why going to Kansas was a bad idea.

++

Lois ignored all the prying eyes as she carried her bags across
the parking lot of the small motel. She had to keep reminding
herself this was Smallville. People looked at newcomers this
way. They were curious, not rude. In fact, they were quite
friendly. Be that as it may, she still didn't want to be here.
She was so glad this corn festival thing was going on. With any
luck, this trip would be uneventful.

An hour later, Lois was fuming at the woman posted in front of
the barricade that had been erected around the latest dig. The
property of Wayne Irig had been taken over by government
workers. They were still insisting that they were looking for
poisonous seepage into the ground water. Lois had seen just
about all kinds of construction equipment in Metropolis. The
equipment on this site had nothing to do with water or poisons.
It looked an awful lot like some sort of radiation seeking
devices. But why would there be any type of radiation here? If
that woman had only given her more to go on...

She made her way back into town to find the annual festival in
full swing. The town square had been transformed into a mirage
of vendors and rides. Lois had to admit this would be the ideal
place to ask some questions. Small town people knew everything
about what happened around them. And they loved to talk. And
with so many people milling around, what were the chances of her
seeing someone she'd rather not?

++

Spending the afternoon listening to one story after another
about small town life was not exactly Lois' idea of the kind of
work she should be doing. She had been right though. She'd
learned that the locals didn't think the government workers were
looking for poisons either. They couldn't fathom what it was the
government would be looking for in their small community, but
they all had a guess. Some thought that they were looking for
bodies killed by the government in experiments during the
Vietnam War. Others thought they were looking for money. And
then there was the alien theory. Lois giggled at all the wild
speculation. She would start over again tomorrow.

The day had wound down to give way to a beautiful starlit night.
The bright sparkles were visible even under all the lights of
the amusements around her. Funny how she'd never noticed how
pretty a night sky really was. Maybe she could enjoy the show a
little longer while she ate dinner.

Lois ordered a generous plate of barbeque from one of the
vendors and found a seat at a table near the bandstand. She may
as well sample the music while she ate.

Half way through her meal, something caught her eye on the dance
floor that had been set up. An older woman was dancing with a
small boy. His face was lit in a beautiful smile as he stared up
at the woman with all the love his small frame could muster. The
woman's face held the same loving expression as she swayed to
the music. When the song ended, the boy bowed gracefully before
leading the woman off the floor. They disappeared into the crowd
on the opposite side.

For a moment she felt a rush of warmth through her body. She
wondered what he would possibly look like now. He would be about
the age of that boy dancing earlier. He would probably also have
dark hair. Maybe big brown eyes and a bright smile. Was he a
smart boy? Of course he was. He had great genes.

She smiled and wiped at the warmth that ran down her cheek. Lois
hadn't thought about him for more than a second or two in a long
time. If she knew what was good for her, she would stop this
train of thought now. Her appetite gone, she pushed back and
started to her motel. Vaguely she was aware of the line-dancing
going on beside her.

She remembered a friend had taken her to a few classes last
year. That had been interesting to say the least. Lois turned to
watch the dancers for a second. That was her mistake. She froze
when she saw him. It had been eight years but there was no
denying that the man dancing there was *him*. She could only
stare.

Transfixed, Lois watched as he executed the steps of the dance
perfectly. He was enjoying himself because he smiled brightly at
his partner. Another mistake. His smile was just as beautiful as
she remembered. It had been that smile that had undone her back
then. Add his warm laughter and that had been a deadly
combination.

Panic raced through her veins. She should leave before he saw
her. Run while she could. But her feet refused to cooperate. She
was transfixed by this man that was once the boy she had known.
Time had been really good to him. She could see, just from his
demeanor, that he was sure of himself, comfortable in who he'd
become. Why had she seen him? Why now?

She was about to tear her gaze away when he spun in her
direction. His eyes fleeted across her for an instant. Lois was
glad when he appeared not to have recognized her. That relief
faded when he stopped. His eyes locked firmly on hers and his
smile faded. Fear overtook her, and she bolted in the direction
of her motel. She didn't dare look back to see what he was doing
now. She just ran.

++

"Clark? Are you okay?" Rachel noticed her dance partner had
stopped. When his smile faded, so did his color. He didn't look
especially good right now. "Clark?"

"Huh?" He finally seemed to have noticed the woman at his side.
"Yeah. I'm... I'm fine. Guess I'm a bit more tired than I
thought. Maybe I should... go get some rest."

"Sure. See you tomorrow?"

"You bet. Thanks for the dance, Rachel."

"Any time."

Clark smiled and slowly walked toward the darkness at the edge
of the square. He stopped to look in the direction the woman had
gone. There was only one place she could be if she was in
Smallville. But why? If he knew anything of her reputation at
all, she was here because of the digging going on by the
government on the local farms. Lois Lane hadn't become one of
the best investigative reporters in the country by writing about
dog shows. And if the government was looking for what he thought
they were looking for, he could be in trouble. It wasn't a
question of if Lois discovered his secret, but when. That would
also open up a whole new can of worms.

Clark mentally debated with himself for a moment. Should he go
talk to her? Would she want to see him? Either of them? Surely
she would have contacted them long before now if that's what she
wanted. And if he saw her again, would she walk away with his
very soul? He decided to leave the past buried deep in the
bruised emotions that would always be part of his relationship
with her. If she wanted anything from him, she knew where he
was. With a lot more to think about tonight, Clark headed for
the booth where his mother was putting her treasures away.

++

Lois slammed her motel room door behind her as if it could block
out the memories that were rushing in on her. Why did she have
to see him tonight? The small boy earlier had been enough. But
him...

She inhaled until she thought her lungs would explode, but the
images were there. The pictures she'd worked so hard to suppress
long ago. It had taken her three years to put Clark Kent's image
out of her mind. He was just a boy then. Now he was a man. And
even though it had been over eight years since she'd seen him,
she knew it was him. The same dark eyes, thick black hair, and
that incredible smile were exactly as she remembered. Now here,
in the darkness of her room, she couldn't imagine why she'd ever
thought she could come to Smallville and not see him.

Clark Kent had been like a breath of fresh air to a teenage girl
who was much older in deed than she was in years. Other boys had
always been a turn-off to Lois. Adolescent in their behavior and
certainly none had ever appealed to her physically. But Clark,
Clark had appealed to her in every way possible.

Lois still couldn't tell you why she'd decided Clark was the one
she'd had to lose herself to for the first time in her life.
She'd rationalized her actions as just over-active teenage
hormones. Neither had thought much about it at the time. They'd
just known that one night would be all they'd have. So, together
two children became a man and woman on a soft quilt as the
moon's light highlighted their bodies.

Good-bye was both sensual and bittersweet. That night and the
last kiss would be all they would ever have to remember the
other by.

Or so she'd thought. Discovering that her night spent with the
farmboy she'd later admitted that she'd fallen hard for had
resulted in a pregnancy had stunned Lois beyond comprehension.
And the road that had spread out before them had been riddled
with debris that proved to be the greatest obstacles she'd ever
had to overcome.

++

Sam Lane may have been one of the best doctors in the world, but
he was the worst father. He was never around when Lois or Lucy
needed him to be. When Lois found out she was pregnant, Sam
seemed to be all over her. He was absolutely horrified that his
daughter could have been in this position. His reputation would
be tarnished with a pregnant teenage girl. Before he could
manage to form any kind of plan, Ellen Lane blew her stack.
Lois' old-fashioned parents set out to Smallville to confront
the boy that had done such a thing to their daughter.

Lois only spoke to either of the older Kents once. Telling
Jonathan Kent that the decision for Clark to take the baby was
for the best had been one of the most difficult things she'd
ever done. When he'd asked her so softly what she'd wanted, it
was all she could do to keep from yelling out that giving up her
baby was not it. But she'd choked out that she wanted Clark to
have the baby and slammed the phone down. Returning to her dorm
room at the Catholic girls' home, she sank to the bed and cried
herself to sleep. From there, it had been a series of ups and
downs for the young mother.

Lois never even saw her baby's tiny face or body. He- they'd at
least told her that much- was taken away from her immediately.
The only comfort she had was that his father was getting him.
She knew he would be in good hands. She had trusted Clark with
her body, now she had to trust him with a piece of her life.

She never saw Clark again. She did talk to him once after the
baby was born. Lois needed to be reassured that Clark was okay
with taking their baby. He told her he was more than okay. She
refused to get into the subject of how things had gone so
horribly wrong between them. Hearing the disappointment and pain
in Clark's voice had been heart wrenching, but she'd managed to
stand her ground. Later, she had given in to her mother and
slowly moved on with her life.

It took three years to put Clark and the baby out of her mind.
Well... not out, but far enough away so that she didn't think
about them every time she turned around. It had been
excruciating at first. In the end, school, then work became her
way of life. She didn't have time for her painful thoughts.

++

Lois swiped at the tears that had found their way down her
cheeks. In the cold reality of the night, she knew it had been
wrong to just walk away. She'd listened to her mother when she'd
told her the baby was better off without her. She'd listened to
her father when he'd said she was too young to keep a child.
She'd listened to her mind when it told her she wanted to be a
journalist more than she wanted anything else in the world, even
though her father insisted she become a doctor. She had gotten
everything she'd always said she would. So why did she feel so
miserable?

Lois slowly made her way into the washroom and got ready for
bed. Her mother was right. That baby was better off without her.
And he wasn't a baby any more. He was seven now. He certainly
didn't need her to interfere with his life, she told herself as
she climbed under the covers.

She forced her thoughts to that deep ravine she'd mentally built
years ago even as her eyelids drifted shut. Letting go of more
tears she didn't know she still had to cry, she fell into a
restless sleep.

++

It was hard to concentrate on your work when all you could think
about was a person from your past. Clark had gotten up that way.
His mind was still on the woman he'd seen last night. He'd known
instantly who she was. Even though she was just a girl the last
time he saw her, he would never be able to get her face out of
his dreams or thoughts. How could he? Each time he looked at
their son, he saw her. The little guy had those same large brown
eyes; his facial features were thin and well defined, leaving
little doubt that he'd grow into a handsome man. And his spirit
was exactly the same as the girl Clark had known.

Clark often wondered if she was still full of fire. He imagined
she must be from her writing. Always careful to download her
stories from the net to keep from seeing pictures of her- scared
his emotions would drive him to contact her, something she
obviously didn't want- Clark had read everything she'd ever
written. He even read the articles to his son at night, wanting
desperately for the small guy to have a connection to his
mother.

That had been the toughest part. Clark was only a boy himself
when he found out about Lois' pregnancy. In an instant that boy
became a man. He grew up faster than he thought possible. He'd
had a difficult time just accepting Lois wanted him to take the
baby. He'd wanted to talk to her. Her father wouldn't hear of
any contact. When he'd listened to the conversation between Lois
and his own father, his heart had broken into a thousand pieces.
Did the night they spent together mean so little to her? He'd
refused to believe that. Yet, she hadn't tried to get in touch
with him either. Clark resigned himself to the fact that Lois
was incredibly intimidated by her folks. So nine months later,
Clark welcomed home his baby son. Together, he and his parents,
gave the baby a good life.

But Clark had never understood how Lois could have just walked
away like she had. The one and only time she'd talked to him,
he'd heard the difference in her voice. He had almost felt the
confusion and the anger, the doubt. He'd tried to reason with
her. In the end she'd simply said the baby was better off
without her. Clark didn't give up immediately. He'd sent
pictures and letters so she could see for herself what she was
missing. However, all the mail came back unopened. Soon they
came back with the message that the addressee had moved and left
no forwarding. Clark's heart sank. He had to resign himself to
the fact that Lois was indeed walking away.

He never gave up hope that one day the phone would ring and it
would be her. He often dreamed that she would write and ask to
see the baby. Then she'd come and fall madly in love with the
baby they'd made under the moon's light that night. Ideas of
being a family and raising a lot of babies danced in Clark's
head. But the phone never rang. The letters never came. Lois
really had moved on as if she'd never been pregnant at all.
Clark was forced to put her out of his mind just to save his
sanity. There was someone else now that depended on him for
care, and he wouldn't let him down.

But everything he ever resigned himself to had changed last
night.

Clark pushed the papers around on his desk in frustration. He'd
had to come in to the paper to straighten out a problem this
morning. He would be joining his mom, dad, and son at the
festival later on. The big dance tonight would officially close
this year's celebration, and he was taking Lana. But right now
the only thing he wanted to do was find out why Lois Lane was in
Smallville.

++

After fighting sleep for what seemed like hours, Lois decided to
do what she always did when she felt stressed: work. She'd been
sitting in the bushes watching the government agents outside the
perimeter of the latest farm for the last three hours. She
should have left when she started to because being led into the
tent at gunpoint was not her idea of the best way to spend a
Saturday.

A large man in fatigues was grinning evilly at her when they sat
her down in the hard chair. She glared at him, but he refused to
be intimidated.

"Ah, Ms. Lane. How are you?" His voice even sounded evil.

"You know my name but I don't know yours."

"True. I am Jason Trask and this is my agency, Bureau 39."

"How nice for you. Do you always lead women around at
gunpoint?"

"I do when the security of our country is threatened."

"Security of our country? What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the threat of the impending alien invasion,"
he told her in a voice that sounded as if he couldn't believe
she's ask such a stupid question.

"Aliens? You're kidding, right?" Lois was staring at him
incredulously.

"I'm afraid not, Ms. Lane."

"So, what do aliens have to do with Smallville?"

"Everything. The advance guard landed here." Trask sat down in a
chair across a table from Lois.

"Advance guard?" Lois chuckled softly. "Don't take this wrong,
but I think you're a taco shy of a combo meal."

"Laugh all you want to, but we have proof. The alien came here
as an infant. He was raised as one of us. Ingenious idea if I
say so myself. Become a human to outward appearances, gain our
trust, then send for the troops. I won't let that happen. This
country is not theirs for the taking."

Just then a young soldier ran into the tent. "Sir, the General
is on the line."

Trask picked up the phone from the table. "General Holcomb." He
listened intently for a few moments. "What?!... Yes... No... I
understand. Yes, we've found several samples. Our scientists
believe it would be poisonous to them... Yes... We'll be packed
and on the plane by noon." Trask clicked the phone back down,
then turned to several officers standing close by. "Pack it up,
soldiers. We're needed in Washington, ASAP." He turned to Lois
then. "Listen carefully. I'm only going to say this once. My
agency tracks and traces alien activity on this planet. We have
traced one such occurrence here. It is believed the baby that
landed is now a man, probably your age. We will stop him before
he can lead his own people against us." He leaned over to stare
her in the eyes. "If you look up Bureau 39, you will find
nothing. But rest assured, we will stop this invasion." He stood
and turned on his heel. Outside, he barked several orders to his
men. A few minutes later the woman that had been posted at the
barricade came and escorted Lois back to where they had found
her.

As she drove back to town, Lois couldn't get what he'd said out
of her mind. This guy was definitely a quack. Aliens indeed. She
laughed away that theory as she pulled into the motel parking
lot. A quick shower was what was called for here.

++

Try as she might, Trask's ramblings ran through her mind over
and over. She found herself at the library conducting a search
on the mysterious officer she'd encountered. She found that
Jason Trask had been an officer in the Army in the sixties.
However, the official reports she found said he had been killed
in a training operation in 1962. There was even a picture of the
man. Although he was a lot younger in the image, there was no
doubt it was the same man Lois had met that morning. With that
information, a ton of questions began to flood Lois' mind.

She couldn't find a Bureau 39 anywhere. She had expected as
much. But why would the military list a man as deceased when he
wasn't? Further searches revealed at least six other men had
died with Trask. She guessed they might even still be alive as
well. Lois found unconfirmed reports that the government had
once had an agency dedicated to alien detection. The report also
said that agency had been dismantled. Having been held at
gunpoint by the insane leader of said group, Lois was sure the
agency was still active and thriving.

Getting as far as she could with her search on Trask and the
military, Lois switched tactics. Trask had said there had been a
baby here in Smallville. Since she didn't believe there were
actually aliens, she figured the madman had affixed himself on
some poor local child. If he was half as crazy as she thought,
this baby had grown to a man and was likely in jeopardy of being
Trask's target in this sick game he was playing.

Since Trask said the child was probably her age, she began her
search from 1965 and continued through to 1968. There were
nearly sixty births of local children, another four foster
children came into the community as infants, and at least six
relatives took up the care of children that were kin to them.
What stopped Lois dead in her tracks was the one and only
adoption by a local couple that had been filed in 1966. Although
adoption records were sealed, Martha and Jonathan Kent had run
an ad in the local paper, dated June 1966, in search of the
biological father of a minor child they intended to adopt. There
was only one child she knew of that the Kents had. Theoretically
she'd known she would probably find something about Clark's
adoption. It still didn't help ease her nerves when she was
actually looking at the information on the screen.

The ad in the paper read as if he was the son of a relative of
one of the Kents. Vague as it was, it intrigued Lois. Call it
reporter's instinct, but she definitely couldn't let this drop.
Another search told her Jonathan had one brother, James. Martha
had one sister, Opal, and a brother, Daniel. James died in the
Vietnam War before he had any children. Opal lived in
Metropolis, no children to her credit at all. Daniel had three
children, all alive, well, and living near him and his wife in
Arizona. The search soon narrowed on cousins and in-laws. Three
hours later Lois was drawing a blank. None of the relatives she
researched had a baby in 1966. Clark had told her his birthday
was February 28, 1966. Whomever he had come from, a relative was
not one of them.

She sat back in her chair exasperated that she couldn't find
what she was looking for. Why did Clark's birth and adoption
bother her so much? And why was it she could still recall nearly
every word he'd said to her that night? Clark still bothered her
and she hated to admit that. She never had before. Taking a deep
breath, she brushed it off as being curiosity. Other than the
things they'd shared with each other, Lois knew nothing at all
about Clark Kent.

"That's all this is, Lois," she told herself. "You're just
curious because you don't know everything about everything."

That had become one of Lois' faults as she tried to move on
after the birth of her son. She would never know a thing about
her baby other than the fact that he was a boy and what little
she knew about his father. She would always know he would be
raised in Smallville with loving grandparents and would probably
be a lot like his father when he was grown. That would be where
it ended. Clark had sent numerous letters. She'd returned them,
deciding it was better if she were to make a clean break.

With all she would never know, Lois made it a rule to find out
everything she possibly could about anything else she ever came
in contact with. That was why she had been valedictorian of her
senior class despite being pregnant and giving birth just weeks
before graduation. Again she received top honors of her college
class, painfully fighting and recovering from all the demons
that had followed her through her days. And that was also the
reason she was at the top of her field in only a few short years
in a profession that was reserved mostly for men. That incurable
thirst for knowledge drove her to be tough and withdrawn. She
might enjoy success professionally, but personally she hid
behind an invisible wall to protect her from the pain she'd
endured all those years ago. The same pain she would endure for
the rest of her life.

"Excuse me, Miss. The library is about to close."

Lois was jolted back to her senses by the voice of the little
old librarian. Lois had been here all day. "Sorry," she replied
sheepishly.

"It's okay."

Lois smiled at the friendly woman as she gathered up her things
and headed toward the door. A thought entered her mind. She
stopped and turned back to the librarian. "Could I ask you a
question?"

"Sure."

"Have you lived in Smallville your whole life?"

"Born and raised. I'm afraid I'll die here as well. Thinking
about moving here?"

"Oh no. I wanted to know about someone that lives here. You see,
I work for the Daily Planet newspaper and I'm doing a story on
one of your citizens." She bit the inside of her lip as the lie
slipped easily from her mouth. She had questions, and since
asking from the source was not possible, she'd do the next best
thing.

"Who is it, sweetie? I'll be happy to tell you anything I can."

"Clark Kent."

The woman smiled at the mention of his name. "Little Clarkie.
Yes, I know him well. Taught him third grade, then piano for six
years. Wonderful student, excellent child, and even better man."
The woman moved past Lois to lock the door. "Come have a cup of
tea, and I'll tell you all I know about Clark."

Lois followed the woman into her office. She sat across the desk
from the elderly lady as she watched her fragile hands prepare
them a cup of tea. "Thank you," Lois told the woman when she set
the cup down.

"You're welcome." The lady sipped carefully, then lowered her
cup. "Clark Kent. Well, I guess you know he is the only son of
Martha and Jonathan Kent?" At Lois' nod, she continued. "They
adopted him, you know. Martha got the fever in '58. Made her
barren. Everyone thought Jonathan would leave her, but he just
loved her more instead. Loving couple those two. Always showing
affection in public. I thought it was so cute. They endured
droughts, tornadoes, and failed crops along with not being able
to have children. When they got Clark, the whole town rejoiced
for them."

"Did they get him from an agency?"

"Oh no. All the agencies told them they were too old. They were
only in their thirties for heaven's sake. Anyway, Martha had a
cousin from out west that got herself into a state at the tender
age of fifteen. Her parents decided she should give the boy to
Martha and Jonathan. And what a wonderful choice. That woman was
the best mother these old eyes had ever seen. Jonathan was the
doting father. There's no way you could have ever told them that
baby wasn't theirs. Still can't."

The woman laughed and sipped her tea again. "Like I said before,
Clark was a wonderful child: polite, well-behaved, and smart as
a whip. He was at the head of his class every year and excelled
in sports. Graduated with honors, receiving offers for a
scholarship in academics and athletics from several colleges
across the country. His parents were proud as peacocks. Course,
the summer after his graduation, he made a few mistakes that
cost him his passage out of Smallville."

"Mistakes? What mistakes?" Lois knew perfectly well what she
meant. She just wanted to hear the local version of their boy
scout's fall from grace.

"Clark met a girl that summer. He found out in the fall that she
was in the family way. Oh, that boy was just beside himself. He
wanted to send for her, marry her, and take care of their baby.
Her parents would have none of that. They saw the whole thing as
a huge mistake. They wanted her to..." the woman leaned over the
desk and whispered, "... get rid of the baby. You know, adopt
him out."

Lois feigned shock. She knew small town folks saw things
entirely differently than those from the city. "Did she?"

"No. Somehow her parents allowed her to carry the child, but she
still didn't keep the little guy." The woman chuckled softly.
"Thank God she let the father have him."

"Ah, Clark has the child?"

"Oh, yes. He never had to think twice about it. He handed in his
scholarship to Midwest University and came home to go to
community college over in Dalton. Clark worked at night after
classes when the baby was sleeping, not wanting to leave him to
anyone else's care any longer than he had to. Every where you
saw that boy he was carrying that baby proudly. And he was a
wonderful father. Still is.

"As soon as he finished getting his degree, he and the boy took
a place in town. He went to work for Mr. Parsons at the paper
and you know what?"

"What?"

"He became editor of the Post last year when Mr. Parsons
retired."

"He's an editor?"

"Well sure. But didn't you know that?"

"Well, ah, yeah. I just forgot. I have so many stories going at
once I sometimes get them confused."

"You should prioritize, honey."

"I'll keep that in mind. So, what's going on in Clark's life
now?"

"He's the editor of the Post, as I said. He moved back out to
the farm to be close enough to help his parents. His boy is a
happy and healthy young man. He's just like his father at that
age: bright, athletic, and well behaved. Pity though."

"What is?"

"Of all the things Clark can give the boy, his mother isn't one
of them. That girl has never even written to inquire about him.
Yet, Clark insists that she loves him."

Lois was blown away. Clark actually told people she loved her
son. How could he know something she didn't even know herself?

"You know," the woman told Lois. "He never has talked about
another girl the way he did that one. He sure must have loved
her."

"Wh... why would you say that?"

"Most men would have moved on, found a mother for their child.
Clark has never been close. He's dated, still does. Just never
lets them get close to that boy. Guess he doesn't want to put
that child through a relationship that might end up worse than
the one he's already living through."

Lois took in the woman's words carefully. One thing jumped out
at her. Clark had been devastated by her pregnancy, and he'd
wanted to marry her. Of course that was something she was never
aware of. Not that it would have made a difference. They were
only children themselves. Marriage would have been a huge
mistake. She knew that much when her parents had given her that
option. She would have regretted marrying Clark and in time so
would he.

She met the woman's gaze again. "I want to thank you for talking
to me."

"No problem. I don't spend time talking to many pretty young
ladies these days." Lois blushed from the compliment. "Well,"
she said, standing. "You better get on over to the diner for a
bite to eat. The dance is starting in an hour. You could get a
lot of information on Clark there. He'll even be there."

"Thank you." She shook the woman's hand and stepped out onto the
sidewalk. How had an investigation on Trask turned into a
curiosity hunt on Clark? Lois stopped in her tracks. Clark was
born in 1966. He lived on the Kent farm, not more than a mile
from where all the government activity had been taking place.
Could he be the fixation of Trask's overactive imagination? And
if he was, what could that mean?

As much as she hated to admit it, she could get much farther if
she talked to Clark. He was the editor of the local paper.
Surely he'd know about the recent activity. However, if this
story had to die right here and now, Clark Kent was one person
she would not speak to. That decided, she entered the diner for
dinner.

++

Clark finally managed to put thoughts of Lois Lane to the back
of his mind. He picked Lana up for the dance and within an hour,
his mood was much better than it had been.

He liked Lana, probably even loved her. He just wasn't sure if
that love was what successful, long-lasting relationships were
built on. Clark loved spending time with Lana and they had spent
a few nights kissing passionately on her sofa. But each time she
tried to take things further, Clark pulled away. After all these
years, it was still impossible to forget the only time he'd ever
felt alive, like a man.

With those thoughts came a whole new set of problems and
worries. He didn't tell Lois about himself that night. No one
but his parents and son knew that he was really a very different
kind of person. And then of course, he and Lois had made another
life that night. Growing up he'd wondered if he would ever be
able to father a child here on Earth. He found out for sure long
before he witnessed the hologram contained in the small globe
that had guided him to Shuster's field that May night. The
hologram of his birth father put to rest any other doubts he'd
harbored about not being a real man. Clark had been sent to
Earth because it was Krypton's sister planet and in fact, both
were completely compatible with each other, including
biologically. The only difference between the two had been the
red and yellow suns. That, his father had theorized, would give
him some pretty incredible abilities one day. Well, that he was
all too aware of.

Those abilities were absolutely extraordinary. Although he'd
kept the secret all his life, he never had been able to stop the
feeling that he should be helping with those gifts. And the
older he got, the more he wanted to help. He just didn't want to
jeopardize his private life or his family to do it.

'Enough,' Clark thought to himself. 'Just enjoy your evening
with your beautiful date.'

He smiled and took Lana's hand in his for another dance.

++

Lois continued to roll thoughts of the government cover-up and
Clark Kent around in her head, more so of Clark. And with
thoughts of Clark, came thoughts of their son. That was one
place she didn't want to drift. It would be so easy to just take
a peek, see him for herself. She'd know some of those things
she'd thought she never would. But it would also be too easy to
fall into that self-pity she'd lived with for so long after he
was born. Truth be known, it wasn't all self-pity. A great deal
was guilt.

She felt guilty for giving him up. Lois had walked away. Clark
was the one who was there. He was the one who had sacrificed his
future because she wasn't strong enough to help raise their son.
He'd cared for the baby that grew to be a young boy. He'd
supported him and loved him. She had only looked ahead, refusing
to look back. She'd buried herself in her work so she wouldn't
think about the small life she would never touch, never be part
of. She had run. While that might have been because of being
intimidated by her parents to begin with, they hadn't kept her
from going to him after she'd left home. She'd done that all by
herself.

All of a sudden Lois was sick. She ran into her washroom,
emptying her dinner into the toilet. Honesty was a mean monster.
And for the first time in her life, she admitted she'd made huge
mistakes where her son was concerned.

Knowing it was too late and that she couldn't change things,
Lois sank to the floor. She allowed herself to feel all the pain
she'd buried so long ago. There, in the silence of the room, she
cried for all she'd given up.

++

Having cried all her tears, Lois forced herself to get up and
make her way to the dance on the square. The quicker she
gathered a few quotes for her article, the quicker she could
leave this place. She needed to put as much distance between her
and the things she'd done as soon as possible. She knew now she
would never out run her demons, but she could at least continue
to give her son what she always had: a good life without the
threat of ever seeing her.

Lois rounded a corner, her attention on the passing car that
held some rather loud teenagers. She wasn't paying attention to
where she was going and didn't see the kissing couple until she
bumped into them.

"Oh, I'm so..." She froze. Her eyes were locked with the one
person she hadn't wanted to get this close to. Suddenly the only
thing she could think of was remaining absolutely still. Maybe
he wouldn't recognize her.

+

Clark, too, was in shock. He was inches from the woman who had
occupied all his thoughts today. As if frozen, he just stood
there.

Lana noticed the strange reaction from Clark and this intruder.
She forced a smile across her lips and cleared her throat.
"Clark? Are you okay?"

He blinked several times before her words registered. "Ah,
I'm..." His eyes darted between Lois and Lana, resting again on
Lois. "H... how are you?" he asked Lois, forgetting he'd been
addressing Lana at all.

"You know her?" Lana wasn't letting him forget.

Clark ignored her question, patiently waiting for an answer.
Lois finally dropped her gaze to her feet for several moments
before looking up at him again. "I'm... okay. You?"

"I'm okay. You, ah, you... look great."

"Th... thank you. So do you."

Lana had had enough of this. She leaned in front of Clark with
her hand extended to Lois. "Hi. I'm Lana Lang. I'm Clark's
girlfriend."

Lois blinked, seeming to finally notice Lana. "Hi. Lois Lane."

"The Lois Lane? Why, Clark, I didn't know you knew her?"

"Yeah. I met Lois several years ago. This is the first time I've
seen her since then." There was so much underlying current in
that comment. And his eyes never left hers, a thousand questions
racing around in his mind.

"That's nice. So, Ms. Lane, what brings you to our little
town?"

"Ah, the government activity."

That temporarily piqued Clark's interest. "Why is the Planet
interested in local ground water testing?"

"Why isn't the town?" Lois countered. "According to the reports
I've read, tests were run in the eighties for what they say
they're looking for now."

"I read those myself," Clark relented. "What do you think is
going on?"

"I had thought it was some big conspiracy until today. I had a
run in with the commander of the operation. Seems he believes
there is a threat to the world of possible alien attack."

Lana laughed at that, but Clark's expression flashed a hint of
terror for just a second. Lois blinked several times before
stammering, "Well, I need to get a few quotes so I can wrap this
thing up. No story here that a good psychiatrist couldn't
handle. Nice to see you again, Clark."

"Wait. When are you going back?" Lois might need to run again,
but Clark saw this as the one and only chance he'd probably ever
get to talk to her.

"Tomorrow."

"I could... give you some articles you might not have on this
thing."

"That's okay. Like I said, they think there are aliens. I think
the Planet should get as far from this as possible. Ms. Lang,
nice to meet you. Clark."

Lois stepped around them, only to be stopped by a hand on her
arm.

+

She looked back into the pleading eyes of Clark Kent. "Take care
of yourself," he said softly.

Her eyes began to sting with unshed tears. She pulled away and
hurried down the sidewalk without responding. His voice was so
sad, so full of emotion. If she didn't get away from him, she
would break down. And that was something she had no intention of
explaining.

+

Clark watched in pure agony as Lois retreated into the darkness.
He wanted her to say more just so he could hear her voice. If
he'd thought she was beautiful when she was sixteen, she was
absolutely gorgeous now. Although she was obviously affected by
their meeting, she still appeared not to want to face the things
that hung between them. He turned his attention back to his date
when he heard her raise her voice.

"You haven't heard a word, have you?"

"Sorry. Guess I didn't expect to see her tonight."

"Obviously. Just who is she to you anyway?"

"Someone I thought I knew once." Clark looked in the direction
Lois had gone, then back at Lana. "How about I walk you home? I
don't feel so well."

"I wish I could affect you that way."

"What?"

"My God, Clark. You lost all your senses when you saw her.
Apparently she still means something to you."

"That's ridiculous. I haven't seen Lois in eight years."

"And if I have anything to say about it, it will be eight more
before you see her again."

Clark felt his temperature rise. Lana was angry and had no right
to be. After all, he was here with her, wasn't he? "Why is this
woman such a threat to you?"

"A threat? Please. I could care less about Lois Lane. I just
feel that if you haven't seen her in all these years, you
shouldn't react this way."

"And just what way is that?"

"Like some love sick school boy. She's Lois Lane, Clark. She
doesn't have time for you."

"What does that mean?"

"Lois is a different breed of woman altogether. She lives to
advance her career. I know her type. I used to be her. She only
wants to use people to get what she wants. Probably sleeps
around to bag all those great stories."

"Lana, I thought better of you than that. I didn't know you
could be so crass."

Lana stared at Clark. "You were in love with her, weren't you?"

"That's not the point here."

"It is the point. You had feelings for this girl and seeing her
again showed you the cold reality. She's not the same person you
remembered."

"No, she's not!" Clark snapped. He couldn't understand why Lana
was upsetting him so, but she was. He wanted her to hush. Lois
Lane was the mother of his son. In his eyes, this meant more
than Lana would ever know. "Lois is nothing like the person I
remember. If she was, she would have been here!"

"What are you talking about?"

Clark took a deep breath. "Look, I would just like to take a
nice long walk. Call me later so I know you made it home all
right."

"But I thought you were walking me home?"

"Lana, please." He started to say something else, but thought
better of it. He stuffed his fists in his pockets and walked
away, leaving Lana in stunned silence.

++

Seeing Lois from a distance was one thing. Standing close enough
to touch her was another. Clark knew he had been in love with
Lois. Her absence had left an ache that buried itself deep
within his very soul. It had taken years for him to get past her
enough to go on with his life. Having a child depend on you for
its very life helped ease the pain, but it hadn't taken it
away.

Until tonight Clark hadn't realized just how angry he was with
Lois. He was angry because she had been so likable. He was angry
with her for saying yes that night. He was angry for her
refusing to talk to him or see the baby. He was angry with her
for sending her child to a stranger and never even checking to
see if the child was okay. He was angry because she hadn't even
mentioned their baby's existence tonight. Most of all he was
angry with himself, for not trying to do something long before
now.

Clark looked up to where his walk had led him. He was standing
on the rocks of the quarry. The place where he'd first spoken to
the person that would change his life forever. All his life he'd
wanted to feel a connection to this world. He had that night,
with her. If he was honest, he did again tonight when he saw
her.

++

Lois had stopped running when she realized she was well out of
town. The darkness engulfed her body the way it invaded her
soul. Why did all this have to happen tonight? She should have
argued with Perry more. She should have taken the dog show
piece. Coming here had been a mistake waiting to happen. The
more she tried to make herself believe she could just move past
this, the more she had to admit she wasn't sure she wanted to.

Earlier, after she'd gotten sick in her room, Lois had faced
some horrible realities. She'd made terrible mistakes. She
hadn't even allowed herself to feel her pregnancy beyond the
slight physical discomfort. Of course, her father had made sure
she had plenty of pain medication throughout the delivery. She
wouldn't have known the sex of the baby had it not been for a
nurse that looked as if she knew exactly what Lois was feeling.

But how could she? Lois hadn't known herself. The months
following the delivery had been awful. She was missing something
she never knew she'd had. That baby *had* been hers. He had
grown inside her and her body had given him life. And he'd spent
the last seven years of his life unaware of the fact that his
mother thought about him nearly everyday. She tried desperately
not to do it. Even lied to herself that she hadn't. None of it
stopped her though. If not but just a single thought, she'd
thought of him every day.

After seeing Clark, and after endless walking and thinking, she
had to admit she would very much like to see him, just once.
Even if it was from a distance, she'd like to know what he
looked like. She'd refused letters from Clark back then, knowing
they probably contained pictures. If she'd allowed herself that
indulgence, she would never have been able to stay away from
him. With all her honesty, came the sad knowledge of just what
kind of person she was. And her son had certainly been better
off not to have known her.

++

The back screen creaked as Clark pulled it shut. His mom had
left the kitchen door open so the house would fill with the cool
night air. When he stepped onto the porch, he realized she was
sitting at the kitchen table.

"Mom? What are you doing up so late?" Clark placed a kiss on her
cheek.

"Hi, honey. I couldn't sleep without your father in the bed with
me."

"Where's he at?" Clark asked as he sat down.

"He took Lane to camp out in the tree house for the night."

"Ahh. He's got to learn to say no to that kid once in a while."

"I don't think Jonathan will ever be able to say no to that
child. Oh, Clark, he's so much like you when you were little."

Clark chuckled, fiddling with a napkin. When he didn't look back
up at his mom, she knew something was on his mind.

"Want to tell me about it?"

Clark's lips drew into a smile as he met his mother's gaze. "You
know me so well."

"Even as a child, it was hard for you to cover your emotions."
She placed a hand on his. "What is it, Clark?"

"Mom," he began, but had to stop when tears filled his eyes. His
mother tightened her grip on his hands, conveying silent
support. "I saw her," he whispered.

"Her?" Her brows knitted in confusion for a moment before
understanding dawned. "When? Where?"

"Tonight. Here, in Smallville."

"What?!" She drew her hand to her face. "She's come for Lane!"

"No, Mom. She didn't even mention him."

"Then what does she want?"

"Actually, I saw her last night in town. I kept telling myself
all day that it was just my overactive imagination. But we
bumped into each other tonight, literally. After the shock wore
off, she told me she was here looking into that water testing
the government has been doing. She knows they're not looking for
contaminated water, too. Said the guy in charge told her they
were looking for aliens. She thinks he's crazy." Clark looked
down at his hands. "Mom, I felt so many things when I saw her.
Fear, anger, excitement..."

"And how do you feel now?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I just can't understand how she
could... walk away." He looked back up at her. "I was so angry
at her. I wanted to yank her up and shake some sense into her.
Lane's the greatest. How can she not want to know him?"

"Honey, I can't begin to tell you I understand what she's gone
through or is still going through. But have you ever stopped to
think that maybe she's not quite sure herself? You of all people
should understand some of the things she may have been
through."

"Kind of 'put yourself in her shoes' kind of thing?" His mom
nodded. "I know you're right."

"But?"

"No. No buts... just an 'I don't know'."

"Tell me."

"Mom, I know it sounds crazy, but I want to see her. Talk to
her. Not to force Lane on her. Just as a... friend. More than
anything I think that's the one thing Lois has lacked."

"You're probably right, son. You've had us and Lane all this
time. Lois may not have had anyone. If you feel you should see
her, then do it. The worst that could happen is that she'll tell
you to get lost... or take Lane."

"Mom, she's not going to take Lane."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. Tonight, when I saw her, I could almost feel her
confusion and pain. She's not heartless, she's just hurting."

"And my boy scout wants to help her?"

"Well, yeah."

Martha laughed softly as she reached to take his hands again. "I
often wonder what things would have been like if her parents had
let her keep the baby or you two had married. Somehow I know
everything would have been okay no matter what."

"That's because you raised a smart boy."

"You better believe it." Martha cupped his cheek, his hand
closed over hers. "Now go! I'm sure if you don't see her
tonight, she'll be gone tomorrow."

"Yeah. She said as much." Clark placed a kiss on his mom's
cheek. "Thanks, Mom." He let his fingers linger on the back of
her hand before he turned and left.

++

Lois continued the aimless walking as she tried to think of
various ways to get a look at her son. She didn't want Clark or
the Kents thinking she was here to cause trouble. The boy didn't
know her. The last thing she wanted was to disrupt his life. She
was certain he didn't understand what she'd done. Heck, she
didn't understand herself, and the last thing she wanted was to
hurt the little guy... or Clark.

Lois stopped when she heard voices. Looking around, she realized
she was in the edge of someone's yard. The voices were coming
from a tree house a few feet from her. Curiosity being her
weakness, she moved closer to the tree to listen to the
conversation.

"And what about that one, Grandpa? Do you think that one's got a
little boy on it my age?"

"Could be, boy. Look here. These look like a hunter with his
arrow drawn."

"Wow! They do. You're good at this. I wouldn't have seen that
one if you didn't show me." A long silence fell between them.
The little boy's voice broke it again. "Grandpa, do you think my
mommy ever thinks about me?"

"Oh, I'm sure she does."

"Sometimes, I look up at the stars and imagine that she's
looking at them, too."

"Maybe she is, Lane. Maybe she is."

Lois stilled when she heard the man say that name. Could it be?
She made a quick survey of her surroundings. The light coming
from the security lamp near the house cast just enough of a glow
for the massive barn to be visible in the distance. Though it
was in the shadows, there was no mistaking that particular
building. She was at the Kent farm. And that was her son talking
up in that tree house.

She stifled her gasp with her hand. His name was Lane. Clark had
named him with a direct reference to her. And he wondered about
her. That meant his father talked to him about her. She was
slowly forming the character she thought Clark was.

Understanding gave way to clarity. She needed to get away before
she was found here. Lois didn't want Clark to think she was here
to cause them further heartache. She slipped back into the
shadows. Before long she was running again, trying desperately
to outrun her very own self.

Lois rounded a corner and ran into someone for the second time
that night. Fear gripped her when the implication set in. She
was in the middle of nowhere, suddenly not so alone.

"Hey, hey, hey. Are you all right?"

That voice. She recognized that voice. "Clark?"

He turned his body and in the dim light of the moon so each
could see the other. "Lois? Are you okay? What are you doing so
far out?"

"I'm fine. I was just... running."

"Little late for exercise."

"I wasn't exercising."

"Oh. I was on my way to see you," he said after a silence.

"You were? Why?" Lois drew a deep breath, then held up her hand.
"Never mind. I know why. Don't worry. I don't intend to cause
you any trouble."

"I know. Actually, I thought maybe you could use a cup of coffee
and a little conversation."

"You want to drink coffee and talk?" She eyed him skeptically
before she continued. "I get it. Clark, we could drink coffee
and talk for the next twenty years, and I don't think I'd ever
be able to tell you why I did all I've done. I've spent the last
twenty four hours trying to answer that myself."

"I just want to know why you never called. You could have at
least done that. Didn't you want to know how he was?"

"Yes! You'll never know just how much I wanted to know. But what
was done was done. He was better off without me."

"What?! Lois, you're his mother!"

"Don't you think I know that?!" Her voice bordered on
hysterical. "Clark, I have missed him everyday of his life."

"You sure have a funny way of showing it!"

"What was I supposed to do? Just show up out of the blue and
say, 'Hi. Sorry I haven't been around. I would like to see my
son now.'"

"That would have been a start."

"Really?"

"Yes, really!" Clark flinched as pain surged behind Lois' eyes.
"Lois," he said in a calmer voice. "I know we can't go back and
change the past, but we can go forward. He's here now, and he
needs desperately to know the woman that gave him life."

"What?"

"I think you need to know him, too."

Lois stared up into Clark's dark, intent eyes. The compassion
behind them was something she'd never seen in a man's eyes.
Slowly she dropped her gaze, the tears spilling down her cheek.

"Lois." Clark reached out to lay his hand on her arm, but she
pulled away.

"He doesn't need me," she whispered. She turned and resumed her
run.

++

Clark was sitting on a bench outside the office of the motel
Lois was staying at when she ran up. He had flown overhead to
make sure she arrived back okay. When he knew for sure she was
going back to her room, he went ahead to wait on her. This time
she wasn't leaving without talking to him.

She stopped when she saw him stand up. "How did you get here so
fast?"

"Doesn't matter. Lois, could we talk? Please."

She brushed past him and walked down the breezeway toward her
room. "There's nothing to talk about."

"His name's Lane. Jonathan Lane," Clark called behind her. Lois
stopped with her hand on her doorknob. "He has your eyes and
your fire. He's in second grade; makes all A's and reads on a
fourth grade level. He's absolutely amazing. You should see him.
Loves to fish and he's started writing. In fact, his essay entry
at the festival won first prize. Excellent story. You should
read it." Clark extended a piece of paper to her. When she
didn't move, he started to read it.

"'You should see her. She's beautiful. Her long black hair
touches her shoulders as it moves in the wind. Her big, brown
eyes are bright. And her hands are so soft. Her touch is
gentle.

But the most amazing thing is her smile. It covers her whole
face and lights up any room she's in. I love her smile.

Happy, that's the way I like to think of her. In my thoughts,
she's perfect. She's never angry and she always has time for me.
She's stronger than she looks because when she holds me I know
she would protect me with her life.

The topic of this year's essay was to describe some of your
favorite things. Some of mine are thinking about my mother.
That's all I can do. You see, even though I think she's the best
mom in the whole world, I've never met her... except in my
heart.'"

Lois was sobbing by the time Clark finished reading the essay.
Without thought, he closed the distance between them and took
her in his arms. She just buried her face in his chest and
allowed the tears to wash away the pain that ate at her heart.
When she calmed, Clark slipped the key to her room from her hand
and opened the door without letting her go. He leaned to lift
her into his arms and carried her to the bed. When he put her
down, she rolled over and buried her face in the pillows. Clark
eased to the edge of the bed.

"Lois," he started softly. "I can't begin to say I know what
you've gone through, but I do know a little about some of the
things you've felt. No matter what's happened, Lane has always
known who you are. I've never tried to hide you from him. You're
the reason he's alive. We've spent many long nights talking
about the person I remembered you to be and the kind of person
we thought you were now. And I've always told him that you love
him. No, I didn't tell him that you would come to see him
someday because I simply didn't know. What I did know was what I
felt that night in your arms. Anybody that can love like that
definitely loves her child."

Clark reached out and rubbed her arm. "I am so sorry you were
alone. I wish you'd let me in. We could have gone through this
together." He squeezed her arm gently. "Why don't you think
about at least seeing him before you go back? No one will force
you, but the option is open to you. We'll be home all day
tomorrow." He stood up and made his way to the door. "If I don't
see you again, I meant it earlier when I said you look good.
You're even more beautiful now than you were eight years ago.
And no matter how painful this has been, it really was good to
see you again....... Goodnight, Lois." With that, he pulled the
door closed behind him.

+

Lois rolled onto her back. He'd said Lane knew about her. The
essay said the boy loved her even though he'd never met her.
Clark had even said she could see him. He was exactly the same
as he was then; the most caring, giving, and trusting person
she'd ever met. But could she upset any of them by seeing Lane?
She knew she had no right to put the little fellow through any
more undue pain. She didn't need any more either. Right now
though, seeing her son was the only thing she wanted to do.

++

Lois watched from her car as the older man climbed from the tree
house. Unable to sleep the night before, she'd driven around
aimlessly. She ended up at the edge of the field near the tree
house where she'd heard his voice the night before. She decided
to just catch a quick glimpse of him. That would satisfy her
enough to move on with her life again.

It had to.

Lois gasped softly when he emerged from the little building.

He was the boy she'd seen dancing with the older woman the first
night in town. Clark was right. He was incredible, even from
this distance. His happy laughter drifted on the air as he ran
after his grandfather. The man ruffled his hair, then pulled him
into his side. A small arm encircled the large man's back as
they made their way to the house.

How had she walked away from him? Lane was obviously a great
little person. Suddenly Lois was sick again. She launched
herself from the car so she could empty her stomach. The nausea
gave way to yet more tears. Life was just so cruel.

++

"Score!" Clark yelled as the basketball fell into the net.

"Come on, Dad. You're bigger than me. It's not fair."

"Not fair?" The boy took advantage of his father's distraction
to knock the ball from his hands. "Hey!" Clark watched with
delight as Lane heaved the ball up to the net.

"Score!" The boy mimicked his father's earlier words.

Clark laughed softly as his son celebrated dramatically. His
smile faded as his super hearing picked up another sound. He
tuned in to hear soft feminine laughter. Looking around, he saw
the source to be a woman in a car just outside the gate parked
on the side of the road. He x-rayed the car to discover that it
was Lois. He couldn't help the smile that found its way to his
lips. She may not be here with them, but she had made a step in
that direction.

+

Lois' laughter faded when she noticed Clark looking her way. She
expected him to indicate her presence somehow. However, he
resumed the ball game with Lane, apparently content to just let
her sit there and watch. And he didn't appear to be pointing her
out to Lane. She was quickly learning that Clark Kent was the
most trusting soul she'd ever known.

+

"Clark, honey, do you know there's a car sitting in front of the
house?" his mom asked him as he stepped up onto the porch a
while later.

"Yes, ma'am. It's Lois."

"Really?" Martha glanced in the direction of the car.

"I think she needs a little time."

"Bless her heart. So I take it you saw her last night?"

"Yes. She said Lane was better off without her."

"Oh dear. What must she think of herself?" Martha's motherly
concern quickly kicked in. This lady might have the power to
take away an important person in their lives, but she'd never be
able to treat her badly, especially when the younger woman was
obviously hurting.

"I know, Mom. She was so sad. The pain I saw in her eyes
shouldn't have to be endured by anyone. I told her a little
about Lane. I think she was shocked he had her name." Clark
looked out at his son throwing the ball up at the net. "I read
his essay to her."

"I can't imagine how that felt," Martha whispered.

"It was painful. She broke down. All these years I've been
right. She does love him."

"Of course she does, honey. She wouldn't have fought so hard
against her parents to send him to you if she didn't love him."

"I told her she could come see him."

"Good. Maybe she'll actually make it all the way to the house
before his bedtime."

Clark laughed softly as he took his mom's hand. "Have I told you
lately that you're the best?"

"No, but now's a good time."

Clark smiled and accepted the hug his mom was offering. "I love
you," he told her when he pulled back.

"I love you, son."

"Dad, I'm going to help Grandpa," Lane yelled when he tired of
tossing the basketball.

"Okay. Just be careful." Clark waved at Lane before he ran off
across the field to find his grandfather. Helping with the trot
lines at the pond was one his favorite things. It gave him an
excuse to get wet.

Clark noticed a few minutes later that Lois was walking toward
the house. He met her half way. "Hi."

"Hey," she said, still looking in the direction Lane had gone.
Her gaze slowly met Clark's. "Thanks for letting me sit."

"Lois, I meant it when I said you could see him. If you prefer
to do it from a hundred yards away so be it."

"Why, Clark? Why are you so willing to let me into his life?"

"Because you're his mother."

"A mother he knows nothing about."

"He may not know you with his mind, but he does with his
heart."

+

Lois just stood and looked at Clark. This man was incredible
himself. He was letting her call the shots, even though she
hadn't been part of their son's life since his birth. What had
she done to deserve that respect?

"You're even better looking in the light," Lois commented
absently, trying to cut through the thick emotions that lay on
the air and saying the first thing that came to her mind.

"Thank you. So are you." Clark gave her one of his best smiles.

Lois felt faint. He did have the most gorgeous smile. She found
herself smiling back, but quickly dropped her head as the heat
crept up her face.

"I didn't mean to embarrass you," he told her.

"No, no. I did that myself." Unable to believe she'd let her
thoughts slip from her traitorous mouth, Lois looked around the
farm her son called home. "Nice place for a growing boy."

"Absolutely. He loves it here. He'd probably love the city, too.
He has the most insatiable appetite for knowledge. He wants to
know everything about everything."

Lois chuckled softly. "So do I. I hate being kept in the dark."
She grew silent as she realized the irony of that statement.
Clark was about to say something else when she spoke again. "I
guess I figured with all I'd never know..." She let the rest of
her sentence trail off.

"You never had to be kept in the dark. I would have been content
to share him with you, even if it was only from a distance."

Lois looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "I'm beginning to
realize that now," she whispered.

+

Clark's heart clenched tight in his chest. He hated to see her
in this much pain. Yet, he didn't know her well enough to help
her. They shared a son and a piece of him loved her very deeply
for that, but the fact still remained that he didn't know Lois
at all. Everything he'd learned about her during their short
time together had been contradicted the day he found out about
Lane.

She turned back to gaze out at the field again. "My mind is
telling to me go, just leave him alone. But my heart... my heart
wants to see him up close, talk to him," she finished on a sob.

"Lois, I told you last night that option was open to you."

"And what if I see him, Clark? Then leave? He'll be upset. I
don't want to do that to him."

"And what if you see him and can't leave?" Lois' eyes widened.
"It is entirely possible that you will meet him and fall so
completely in love with him that you'll want to be part of his
life."

"What?!"

"I know I did. I do every day. You can't know Lane and not want
that. He is the most incredible person alive."

"And... and... what if that does happen? Are you willing to let
me be part of his life?"

"Absolutely," Clark answered without hesitation.

"Clark..." Lois swiped at the tears on her cheeks. "I live in
Metropolis."

"So? He's always wanted to see the city."

Lois simply stared at Clark for several moments before she
spoke. "I've never met anyone like you," she told him softly.

"I hope not," he told her with a smile. She finally allowed the
one playing behind her lips to spread out. "Wow. You have a
great smile. You should do it more often."

She ducked her head again and scuffed her foot in the dirt.
"This is... well, it's a lot to take in all at once."

"I understand. You forget, I've been there."

Lois met his gaze again. "I guess you have." They were silent
for a moment while they tried to gather their thoughts, neither
exactly sure what to say next. She glanced around at the field,
half wanting the boy to come running back toward the house. "I
think..." She gestured behind her with her head. "I'm not quite
ready... yet."

Clark sighed heavily. He had to remember no matter how badly he
wanted Lane to meet his mother, the decision was entirely Lois'.
"Okay."

She nodded briefly and turned to go back to her car.

Clark watched as she got in and drove away. He looked down sadly
at his mother when she touched his arm.

"Oh, Clark. Now I know where Lane gets his incredible looks."

"Yeah. She's even more beautiful now than she was then."

"Do you think she'll want to meet him?"

Clark took another glance to where Lois had been before smiling
down at his mother. "I sure hope so." He wrapped his arm around
her and led them back to the house.

How had he gone from such intense anger for the woman that had
abandoned her child to this feeling of compassion for the scared
little girl he'd just seen? Easy... his love for Lane. He'd do
anything for his son. As much as he would hate to have to leave
Smallville, he'd take Lane to Metropolis just to be close to
Lois if she ever expressed the desire that that was something
she wanted.

++

Lois paced back and forth in her small room the rest of the
afternoon after seeing her son, then had lain awake all night.
Clark told her she could see Lane. Did she want to? A huge part
of her did. Just as huge a part wanted to get on a plane and go
back to Metropolis and pretend none of this had ever happened.
Her rational side told her that would never be possible again.
She would be unable to wipe the image of the small boy from her
mind. And what was more, she was beginning to think she didn't
want to.

She looked down at her watch. Clark should be at the paper.
Maybe she would go talk to him once more. Just as she was about
to leave, the phone rang.

"Yes?"

"Lois?"

"Yes. Who is this?"

"This is Martha Kent. Lois, would Clark happen to be there?"

"No. Why?"

"He left just before dark last night to go to his office after
he got a call. He said he wouldn't be long, but he hasn't been
home. I'm starting to get worried. I thought maybe he'd stopped
by to talk to you at some point."

"No. I haven't seen him."

"Thank you. Sorry to have bothered you."

"Wait! Mrs. Kent, does Clark do this often? Disappear for long
periods?"

"No, of course not. He likes to eat breakfast with Lane. He
wouldn't miss that unless something serious had detained him."

Lois was even worried now. Her mind tried to process what little
she knew about Clark. "Did you call his other friends? He was
with a woman the other night."

"Yes. I called everyone. Lana hasn't seen him. She and Clark had
a disagreement so she wasn't very helpful at all."

"Oh." An idea came to Lois. "Do you think he might be looking
into this government excavation mess?" She had completely
forgotten about everything but Lane, even the story she'd been
sent to get.

"Who knows? Sometimes I think the boy looks for trouble."

Lois couldn't help but smile. That's what Perry told her about
herself. "If I hear from him, I'll let you know."

"Thank you... And Lois?"

"Yes?"

"The invitation to see Lane comes from myself and my husband as
well as Clark. Lane's mother has always and will always be
welcome at our home."

Lois was so shocked she had to grab the small table for support.
"Th... thank you, Mrs. Kent," she managed after a moment. "You
don't know what that means."

"You're welcome."

Lois listened to the dial tone for several moments before the
problem at hand came back to her. Clark was missing? Where could
he have gone? Everything she'd learned about him told her the
man was the most responsible person she'd ever met. Why would he
just disappear?

She snatched up the keys to the rental car and left to see if
she could help the man she suddenly wanted to get to know a lot
better.

++

Lois' destination was the newspaper where Clark worked, but a
plain white van she passed got her attention. It may not have if
she hadn't recognized the driver. He was one of the officers
she'd seen with Trask the other day. She quickly followed the
vehicle at a distance.

It had taken the better part of an hour but finally the van
pulled up to a dilapidated old shack. She parked her car in the
trees and crept closer. When the officer opened the door, she
saw Clark sitting at a table and Trask paced back and forth in
front of him. She thought the Colonel was supposed have gone
back to Washington.

Within seconds, Lois was close enough to hear the conversation
inside the building.

"We can stay here forever, Kent. You are going to tell me what
you know about the alien."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I've told you the same
things over and over again."

"And I've told you! An alien creature landed here as an infant.
You see the small craft. Even you can't deny that is an alien
vessel."

Lois had to see this spaceship. She stood on her tiptoes to peek
through the window. A shiny gray... spaceship?... Whatever it
was sat on top of a table in the corner.

"This landed the same year you were born. I think the alien has
somehow infiltrated you into his plans. All I want to know is
when will the invasion take place? How many will there be?"

Clark simply heaved a breath, but didn't speak again.

"Maybe if you had some persuasion to talk. Say... your son."

"You leave my son out of this!" Clark barked at the man.

"Touchy, touchy. Tell me, were you the first to taste that
fire?"

"What fire?"

"The fire that's known as 'Mad Dog Lane'? I'll bet she was a
hottie even at sixteen." Trask seemed to be baiting Clark even
more.

Clark shot to his feet only to be subdued by two officers.

Trask grinned widely. "I see she's still a sore spot. You know,
I talked to her the other day. She's nowhere near as
intimidating in person as I'd heard she was. I would have
thought abandoning her child the way she did, she would have
been fire and ice."

Clark jerked away from the men holding him and before anyone
knew what had happened, he was holding Trask against the wall in
a death grip. "Let's get one thing straight. Lois Lane and Lane
Kent have nothing to do with this. If you feel I'm connected to
your insane ravings, then you deal with me. And I suggest you
shut your mouth."

+

Trask stared Clark down. After a moment, the young editor's mild
manners returned and Trask was released.

"I think you are connected to the alien," Trask gasped after a
few moments. He smoothed the front of his uniform and went to
retrieve a metal box from beside the small ship. "We found other
things along with this ship."

Clark theorized whatever was in the box was what they'd been
digging for. He also knew the government agents had long ago
stolen the tiny ship from his parents' property. He and his dad
had buried it together when he was just a boy. They felt it
would be safer buried on the back nine than in the farmhouse
cellar. How wrong they'd been.

"In this box is what I think is a piece of the planet this alien
came from, or at least some meteorites from the atmosphere
around the planet. It's alien in origin and emits a strange
radiation, completely harmless to humans. I believe it would
kill our intruder though." With that, Trask lifted the lid of
the box.

Clark felt pain wash over him the likes of which he'd never
known before. His head throbbed, he felt faint, and he could
tell his powers were draining. He doubled over to hold his
stomach and collapsed.

Trask's brows rose out of sight. "Well, I'll be damned."

+

Outside the window a stunned Lois Lane almost fainted. What the
hell did this mean? Was Clark some kind of alien? That was
insane, yet he was writhing in pain on the floor. And to prove
it wasn't a hoax, Trask shut the box lid a couple of times. Each
time he did, the pain lines on Clark's face faded only to return
when the box was opened again.

"Lane," she whispered. If Clark was some kind of freak, what did
that make her son? She covered her mouth and took a step
backwards and stepped right into the arms of a soldier.

+

"Well, well," Trask almost sang when one of the three soldiers
brought Lois inside. "What do we have here?" He studied the
woman as she stared down at the helpless man lying on the floor.
"Please don't tell me you didn't know about him." When she
failed to say anything, Trask laughed. "You didn't." He bent
over Clark. "Shame on you, alien. You should have told your
little girlfriend just how different you were. It's a shame she
has to suffer now because of it."

"What?"

Trask looked back up at Lois. "If you'd never slept with this...
freak, there wouldn't be a half breed running around. You will
suffer because your son will have to die."

"No!"

"I'm afraid we can't leave the thing to contact any of his
people."

"He's... not... a... thing," Clark managed to grind out.

"You're quite right. He's a memory. Go get the little bastard,"
Trask barked at his men.

The two officers that had been holding Clark earlier left for
the door, but they both stopped short.

"Colonel, you should see this."

Trask turned to see at least ten police cars and several
unmarked cars outside.

"This is the FBI. Throw down your weapons and surrender," called
a voice on a megaphone.

"Like hell I will." He grabbed Lois around the throat and went
out the backdoor, only to find more police. "Get back or I'll
blow her head off."

Clark felt a little relief. When Trask passed the table, he
knocked the lid closed on the box of the deadly meteor.
Summoning all the strength he had, Clark heaved himself off the
floor and launched his body at Trask and Lois. The action caused
Trask to lose his hold and knock Lois to the ground. Clark heard
a gunshot and immediately crawled to cover Lois with his body.
He held her head tucked against his chest as more shots rang out
around them. When it became quiet again, he leaned back to look
at the woman beneath him.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah. You?"

"I think so."

She nodded and slowly Clark eased off her. They were soon caught
up in the middle of a swarm of bodies.

++

It turned out Colonel Jason Trask had been under investigation
for numerous crimes. The FBI had gotten wind of the fact that
the decorated officer was alive even though he was listed as
deceased. The Army denied knowing and cast off Trask as a good
officer gone bad. Everyone knew that was probably not true, but
how did you prove something against the Army?

Lois and Clark were both checked over for injuries before being
released. It appeared no one was the wiser about Clark's
identity because the police simply thought Trask had gone mad.
Lois offered Clark a ride home, needing desperately to speak
with him.

She was silent all the way back into town, but glanced over at
Clark several times. His color wasn't the best and she could
tell he struggled to grasp exactly what had happened. Instead of
taking him to the farm or the paper, she pulled into the parking
lot of her motel.

"What are we doing here?" Clark asked.

"I think we need to talk."

Clark simply nodded before he scrambled to follow her into her
room. Once inside she wrapped her arms around her body and
studied a point on the floor before she spun to challenge him.

"Who are you?"

Clark sighed heavily. "Okay. Let's see if I can get this
right."

Lois listened in rapt attention as Clark detailed his life for
her. He told her all about the side of himself that only his
parents and Lane knew. He told her of his origins, his powers,
and without meaning to, a great deal of his feelings spilled
forth.

Nearly two hours later, Lois reached over to lay her hand on
Clark's arm. "I'm so sorry, Clark. I had no idea you felt all
those things," she said softly. He gave her a weak smile.

When she'd first seen from that window that Clark was from
another planet, she'd been terrified. Horror stories of aliens
had flooded her mind. But listening to Clark, she knew all that
had been ridiculous. Clark was just as human, probably more so
than anyone she'd ever met.

"So, you can really fly?"

"Um huh."

"That's so cool!"

"You think so?"

"Clark, the things you can do are incredible. I'll admit at
first I was afraid of the reality of this. I was afraid for
Lane. But... this is... well, it's great!"

"Lois, I'm sorry I didn't tell you that night. It's just that I
vowed never to tell anyone and well... things got out of
hand..."

Lois' smile faded as she held Clark's gaze. "Is that all it was
to you, Clark? Out of hand?" Why had she asked that? Hadn't she
agreed with herself that she would never return to that night,
to those feelings?

"No," he whispered. "There hasn't been a day since I haven't
thought about that night and our time together. What we
shared... it just felt right. How is that possible? We were
kids."

"I know." Panic began to rise in Lois. She knew exactly what
Clark meant. So many times she'd argued with herself over her
feelings for that handsome black haired boy, finally convincing
herself that it was just infatuation.

And she believed it until she'd seen him again. When he'd smiled
that first full smile at her...

She had to break this tension... now. Almost jumping to her
feet, she declared, "You need to call your mom. She's worried
about you."

"My mom? How do you know?"

"She called here looking for you."

"Is that why you came out to that farmhouse?"

"I was actually going to your office when I saw the van. I
followed it on a hunch, like I always do. But it looks like I
wasn't the only one interested in what Trask was doing."

"Yeah. I'm just glad you didn't get hurt."

"Thanks to you." She smiled and handed him the phone.

Clark accepted the offer and called his mom to let her know he
was okay. He hung up and stood to go.

"I should go. I'm still not feeling the best."

"Sure." Lois followed him to the door.

He turned back to Lois. "Have you thought any more about seeing
Lane?"

"That's all I've thought about. Clark, I just don't know what to
do here."

"Just see him. Talk to him. We can take everything else from
there."

"What would I say to him? How do I explain where I've been? Why
I haven't come to see him?"

"You'd know what to say."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I'm not sure, Lois. I just know if you don't do this, you'll
regret it for the rest of your life." That was so true. Lois
could only hang her head. Clark lifted his hand and squeezed her
shoulder. "Just think about it. We're listed in the book."

She nodded and held the door while he left. Could she go see
Lane? Should she? One thing was for sure. Clark had been right.
If she didn't, she'd regret it for the rest of her life. And she
just didn't think she could heal again.

++

Clark smiled down at the paper before him the following morning.
A huge headline in the Daily Planet told of Colonel Jason
Trask's fall from grace. The by-line belonged to Lois Lane...
with special contributions from Clark Kent. He was overwhelmed
she would give him credit when he hadn't even helped write a
single line. He took it as one way she was trying to make up to
him for the lack of contact over the years. He quickly rethought
that. He wasn't sure yet just how he perceived Lois, but shallow
was not it.

"Watcha' smilin' at, Daddy?"

Clark looked over at Lane before he pushed the paper in front of
the boy. Lane read carefully before he looked up at his father.

"You've seen her?"

"Yeah."

"Where? When? Why didn't you tell me?"

"The last I saw her was yesterday. She was at the farmhouse
Trask had me in. I didn't tell you because I was hoping she'd
come see you."

"Is she going to?"

"Lane, I just don't know. She's really, really scared. Lois is
confused and ashamed of the things she's done. She wants to see
you but is scared of what you'll say or do."

Lane hung his head to look at his mother's name on the paper.
"Could you just take me to get a glimpse?"

Clark smiled and laid his hand over Lane's. "That's what she did
with you."

Lane's eyes f