The Top Ten Martha’s Mommisms

By Lynn S. M. [ (Replace _at_with@)]

Rated G

Submitted May, 2010

Summary: Ten things Martha might have said to young Clark.

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I was thinking about “Mommisms” those things that it seems as though every mother says. Things like, “If everyone else jumped off a cliff, would you do so, too?” Or, “I’m cold. You put on a sweater.” Or, “Don’t cross your eyes or your face will freeze that way.” Well, the way I figure it, given the special nature of her little boy, Martha’s “Mommisms” would probably have been a little different than most. So without further ado and with tongue very much in cheek ...


10) You don’t need to eat your spinach or drink your milk. You have already grown quite big and strong enough as it is.

9) Don’t run with those scissors you might trip and damage them.

8) Always wear a clean pair of underwear over your pants.

7) This will hurt me a lot more than it hurts you.

6) Clark Jerome Kent, I’m going to give you until the count of one ...

5) When it comes to sports, never give it your all!

4) Don’t you DARE look through me like that, young man!

3) What? You can lift cars, but you can’t pick your jacket up off the floor and put it on a hanger?!?

2) You have to get up now. The school bus will be here in half a minute, and you still need to get changed and eat breakfast.

1) Just for that, young man, you are grounded. No flying for a month!