Dear Kal-El

by Joe Dawis

Summary: Lois decides it's time to tell Superman she's dissatisfied with their relationship. She's found someone else.


Lois: "Superman, I think we should stop seeing each other."

Superman: "I don't understand…"

L: "I just don't think I can deal with this anymore."

S: "What do you mean? Deal with what?"

L: "Well, the secrecy, for one thing. I don't want to keep hiding our relationship. I feel like I'm dating a married man."

S: "But it's not the same thing. You know it's for your own good. If my enemies ever knew…"

L: "I *know*. I know. But — well you *are* a married man in a way. You're married to all of Metropolis — no, to the whole world. The world *needs* you, Superman, and I just don't think I have a right to make the demands on your time that our relationship needs…"

S: "(sigh) I know it's been rough. Preparing gourmet dinners for one,…"

L: "…watching the last hour of 'Sleepless in Seattle' alone,…"

S: "…flying back from Rome by plane,…"

L: "…and your disguises on our dates! Gawd you look AWFUL in glasses!"

(they both laugh nervously)

S: "I don't know what to say, Lois; but it's no different from being married to a doctor, or an FBI agent, or Jimmy Carter…"

L (shaking her head): "It's A LOT different! Anyway, I'm not sure even a Fox Mulder is what I'm looking for…"

S: "But there's no reason we can't work through this, is there?"

(pregnant pause as no response is forthcoming from Lois)

S: "There's something you're not telling me."

L: "It's, uh, just that, well, there's someone else…"

S: "NOT LUTHOR?!" (he's back by this time, of course)

L: "No! No, of course not! What kind of an idiot do you — don't answer that! (pause) It's, uh, well, you know, it's… Clark. I think I'm in love with Clark Kent."

(Superman is too stunned to reply.)

L: "But we can still be friends, can't we…?"