One Suit, Two Suit, Red Suit, Blue Suit

By Caroline Baker (

Summary: A Lois and Clark poem written in the style of Dr. Suess.

A while ago on the IRC, we talked about assigning fanfic to be written in different genres for a summer reading program. When Morden suggested Dr. Suess, I thought that would mesh perfectly with my literary abilities. It's a really fun style to do, because when you run out of rhymes, you just make up a word :) It's very silly, but I liked writing it. So here it is:


"I don't sleep with people I work with" she said with a frown.
"This is *business*" continued the woman in brown.

But Clark was in love, had been at first sight.
Still he knew that he'd float alone that night.

He had to content himself being her partner and friend.
But she loved his disguise. Could it be the end?

Lois draped herself over the man wearing tights
while Clark had to suffer insults and slights.

Clark would visit her via her window. He wanted her as Supes.
It seemed like a sin though.

Clark couldn't tell where their relationship was going.
In fact he couldn't tell if it was raining or snowing.

He was bamboozled by villains, his job and Scardinos, Maysons and Zasons and unfair subpoenos.

Poor Clark, so confused his expression says "Huh?"
He wondered what to do Hey, Clark, no duh!

It was time for some action Not from Supes, but CK.
Why can't the reporter try to save the day?

He learned to dance from a princess.
He can't find the beat though.
It's up to Lois to put some snap in his Frito.

She grabbed Clark by the collar then caressed his cheek,
took off his glasses, and started to speak.

"I really love you, my darling, Clark.
I would love you in the dark.
I would love you in a train.
I would love you on a plane.
I would love you in black leather.
I would love you in rainy weather.
I would love you when I'm frozen.
I would love you in lederhosen.
I would love you in mid-air.
Clark, I'd love you anywhere!"

He picked her up and flew away.
Stories for the Planet would go unwritten that day.

They shut themselves in a nearby phone booth.
Perry just smiled and Jimmy said "Smooth."